Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy How gifted is she?

My youngest daughter is 8 and since the beginning this year she has stopped thriving. She's recently told us she doesn't want to go to school as she is afraid of the work. They get behavior warnings for not finishing. She has a processing issue and is borderline ADD. We are having toilet issues such as holding her poop in and not letting us wipe . I saw the pediatrician today and she wants us to see a child therapist. Maddy is so anxious it's affecting her whole life. She is very smart but school has been very difficult.
She often gets bullied and the girls are rather mean. We have had two meetings with the school and now we are demanding an IEP. She has frequent migraines due to stress and she is always worried. As her mom I am very worried about her and praying all will go well. It is nice to see I am not alone and I hope to learn some things here.

Grinity, do you remember where you read about the cortical thickening delay? Very interesting.

We can't really afford testing, so I'm sort of hoping before long DD's sensory thing of picking at her face will be enough to trigger an eval and then we'll get an IQ in there too, to give us some idea... I go back and forth between thinking she's getting what she needs and thinking they are way under challenging her.

I've heard this also. I recall reading something about it (can't remember where) and I also had an email discussion with someone at SENG who said that gifted kids are similar to ADHD kids in this regard (delayed meta cognition and cortex development... or something like that... I should pull up the email so I can quote it correctly). Anyway... she said that gifted kids shouldn't be tested before the age of 8 years because behaviours can get in the way of results.

Here's a link with a pretty good discussion of the gifted/cortical thickness concept:
http://www.sagepub.com/upm-data/32712_Sousa_(Gifted_Brain)__Ch1.pdf

Lnl48 - I would recommend you don't go to "any old" therapist. I'm leary of those big-box type practices that churn out the diagnosis. When you interview them (as you should) try and get a feel for their understanding or respect of the sensory processing issues. Someone like an art therapist might be more likely to understand and work from this perspective. They often work with children who have been through trauma. At first i thought this didn't fit my DD but i called to ask about my DD and what the art therapist thought. The one my DD started seeing said that a child who has had a history of getting picked on and constant anxiety in school should be viewed as someone who has lived to learn with trauma - especially when these experiences are so fixed in early schooling and schools are not supportive (like punishment for not finishing etc.)

She also doesn't believe that thing you'll hear some school personnel say, "There is no bullying at our school".

Good luck.

Thanks, Zen Scanner!

There's an awesome therapist in our town that works with gifted kids. And doesn't take insurance hoping to get the school/district to step up or to find at least a grad student.

mayreeh~
May I ask what is "the one subtest" that you were told to look at and upon that one subtest base PG on ?
I only ask b/c I am going to be testing my DS and I want to make sure that this particular subtest is included.

One tester told me she does just 4subtests (out of the 15avail) and another told me she does 10 and the other 5subtests are just for alternative testing if one of the other 10 are not appropriate *how does Tester know that? idk*

Anyhow, thanks

Cc6 - 10 is standard, and there is a particular 10 that are usually used, if one of those is spoiled then they can substitute another. For example my 2nd DD started misbehaving during the last subtest of her first testing session (the tester routinely tested across two appts), testing stopped, that subtest was discarded and an allowable alternative added to the next session (which she ceilinged, perfect score).

Be aware this is an ancient thread.

I am for telling the children exactly what's going on and I will share my story as an explanation.

I hated school and had no friends; I never found out why or had any help from teachers or parents. It was not until in my late 30s that I happened upon a special book- "Miss-diagnosis and dual-diagnosis of Gifted and Talented Children and Adults." As I read the book I said, "That's me and that's me and that's me!!!"

That was the first time I had an explanation for my troubles!!

I still do not know what my IQ score is though I know I fit the highly gifted category in terms of school experiences. Now I have two children: a girl age 8 and a boy age 6. Because we homeschooled for two years the school put my 8 year-old in 2nd which was a good idea because she needed time to adjust to school versus home. But now the school staff are not doing what I think is best for her which is advancing her to third.

I have open and frank discussions with her and this morning she told me she still has some trouble but things have been better, overall, for her than they were for me and I think it is directly from our discussions and the help I am able to provide her. She is very similar to me, though different in some ways, so in many situations I can help her a lot. I never had help; either others had no experiences similar enough to relate to me or I felt I understood my problem better and had tried every idea they could offer, with little success.

Besides, gifted kids are unusually insightful and they know when things are not right. Why not talk frankly with them as soon as they show they can understand the conversation- no matter what age-range that happens to fall in. For one thing, it will give them a tool to help them deal with difficulties as they arise, which is a given. At least they will understand why they are different and possibly accept those facts instead of continually trying and failing to fit in.