Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional our special ed preschool visit today

I did wonder about if the school has been so efficient in getting the kids to follow the rules in just the few weeks since the beginning of the class? But then I was also thinking ... Could they really manage in 6 weeks what therapists and family has not been able to do in 3 years? But you might be right. I hope!

Indepedent of other factors, I'd imagine many gifted kids just aren't sheep. We didn't have a special ed school, but DS had all the behaviors that you mentioned in pre-school. I think they'll happen in any context when the kid is wired that way. Biggest things we looked for were if the school was tolerant and supportive of his unique ways. Sometimes he would sit with the group, follow directions, etc. when he didn't, as long as he was safe they allowed him to drift and used gentle redirection.

I think I may have to stress to the school that our main reason why we are putting him in (after fighting a lot to even get the spot) is to learn social interaction. To not shy away from the kids when there are too many ... and to be able to join in rather than do everything else to be able to stay away from them. He has this huge drive to be WITH kids, yet he only really needs to be next to them. Unless they are completely into what he's doing and he can explain it to them and have them follow him, he has zero interest in what the other kids are doing.

There is another class that's a morning class at another school in our district where our friends' daughter goes and as much as at first I did NOT want them together for many reasons, now I'm wondering if DS being in the class with his "friend" would help him learn the rules and learn some following? She has been in that class for about 6 months so has the ins and outs down pretty well.

Agree with Geofizz here. You can't expect all the kids in a special needs preschool to have your son's blend of autism and giftedness (that combination is rare). Most will have other challenges they are working on. It's great that they will serve as peer models for the skills he needs to learn.


20 minutes is a lot. It's also what they did in our kindergarten for circle time, so it's the standard that needs to be reached.

For a bright kid with autism, the skill of checking in mentally and getting interested in something not of his choosing is a hard one. That skill can be learned, and should be learned. It is absolutely a key, not only for school success, but also for employability. (Imagine an adult who will only do work tasks that interest him... that won't go well.)

Over time a person can learn to be more flexible and develop new interests.


Probably not in 6 weeks. It takes a long time to remediate these social deficits. But I think putting him in an environment where he can practice the skills of tuning in, following instructions, and sitting still is very much worth doing.

They will probably want to rewrite the IEP after they get to know him a little. You can work with them to make a plan that fits what he needs to learn. Remember that while he will be more interested in differentiated materials, they may not be the thing that will help him engage in group instruction, which is the point of his participation there. Some daily work on learning to tolerate boredom is okay.

If he were mine, I would absolutely not want him to learn that he's exempt from instructions and can drift around the classroom away from what other people are doing; that would be a step back. He should be rewarded positively for keeping his head in the game, so that he learns to feel that it's worthwhile to engage with others, both in formal instruction and infomal play.

DeeDee

One big problem he has with Story time ... he's scared. He's gotten extremely sensitive to stories, he can't watch many of the shows on PBS because he starts screaming that he's scared and jumps and hide behind the couch.

on Monday at the story time in the library, they were reading some simple kids book that had a picture of grass growing and the roots and all that and he ran out saying it scares him. Yesterday during the school story time, again he was scared of the Thomas book story line and I think that's why he wanted to make up his own story that he wouldn't be afraid of.

So maybe when he outgrows this fearful stage, it will be easier for him to focus on the circle time? I just hope it doesn't take him as me! I used to hide behind the couch watching kids shows till I was about 10! Even now watching movies with my husband I put my hand in front of my eyes and watch between two fingers! ... Maybe that's a strategy I should teach my son???

What does he think of being with his "friend"? Maybe you could do a visit there and see if the environment is different there and also observe any changes in ds with knowing a child in class.

I agree with Zen Scanner...I think you're looking for a difficult-to-find balance of flexibility with an encouragement to be plugged in to what the class is doing and follow someone else's agenda (the teacher's).

It may be too much to expect more than parallel play for him right now...but I do think there is great value in gently challenging his 'zen' - since you know that he will be challenged increasingly as he gets older.

I think there's also merit in having someone else do the challenging...sometimes kids are more receptive to this than with their own parents.