Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Hi I'm new :)

I found this site through a link on Psych Today. I feel I am a gifted/2e individual (college level) struggling with what to do regarding education, work, emotional issues and struggling with home life. I am in college right now but don't really want to go anymore, because it's too much of a high-pressure environment for me. Unfortunately, my family has very little money and is deeply in debt, and can't afford to pay out-of-pocket for what's considered "personal enrichment" courses, and are pushing me to get a bachelor's in the hopes of me finding "a good job." I know I don't want a college degree or whatever's considered "a good job" because it'd likely be something "secure" but dull like office work or business. I feel I truly am an artist, which is probably why I'm so up/down moody all the time, not to mention I'm so frustrated with school... and my old-fashioned family

I wish there had been programs like this when I was growing up, and am disappointed that this school doesn't offer post-secondary education (a Davidson U of sorts). But I am looking to network with other people who seem to have an understanding of what it means to be GT/2e and struggling with the constraints of modern society. Hopefully we can share/pool resources and advocate for the best and brightest who are sadly falling through the cracks. Thanks in advance, and I hope I can offer some of my own seeds of prior experiential learning ;D and help someone else out too

Well, you do need to make enough money to do things like eat and pay rent/mortgage.

A college degree in something like accounting will serve that purpose.

College degrees are like high school degrees used to be.

Getting a degree doesn't automatically consign you to a life of drudgery. The opposite of "good job" is not "the ability to pursue my artistic interests without financial worry," but rather "bad job / no job."

I personally find that brainstorming every option available to me, without regard to whether I'd actually exercise that option, makes me better able to tolerate the option I eventually choose. But I need to put *every* option on the table - I could get up from my desk, get in my car, go down to the bank and clear out whatever money's there, and start life over somewhere else, unencumbered by family or responsibilities, for instance. That I don't, means that that I freely choose to remain encumbered, not that I'm trapped by the encumbrances. And an encumbrance you choose is a lot easier to tolerate than a trap, you know?

Hi Simple gifts - welcome.
Many college's have centers that provide services for multiexceptional people. If you are finding college to be 'high-pressure' and are gifted, then it's likely that your '2e' issues need to be handled more strategically. Find a mentor. Find adult support.

Don't convinse yourself that 'you don't really want a college degree because you are to artistic' - that's a convient excuse. (We gifties are almost all guilty of thinking too much inside the privacy of our minds and getting a little off course, so please don't take this personally.) Get the support you need to handle your challenges and win a little, then the world will look very different.

Lots of gifted people have tons of experience 'floating through'life, and the minute it's time to 'work hard' they feel as though something is terribly wrong. Actually something might be terribly right - you may be on the cusp of discovering/developing strengths you never knew you had.

Working has it's disadvantages, but I don't know any other way to get the presonal choice and freedom that comes with it.

Good for you for posting!
Grinity

Somebody mentioned accounting, and that reminded me of a woman who was shopping for neckties when I was working in a department store on a leave from college. She said, "My boyfriend's an accountant. Do you have anything...dull?"

First let me tell you that people who graduate from college are more likely to find their work "very interesting" than people with some college. People with graduate degrees are significantly more likely to find their work "very interesting," according to the same Pew Research poll:

http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/files/2011/05/2011-higher-ed-03-04.png

Then let me tell you a bit of my own story.

I took a leave from college because I was on academic probation, my mom hadn't done my financial aid paperwork on time, and I was not really sure I wanted to keep working in college. So I spent a summer and a fall semester waiting tables and selling menswear. At the age of 20, I really needed to see what life outside of school was. I also needed to grow up a bit. By Christmas, I had convinced myself that studying really was the easy way out. I got the paperwork done and came back to school.

When I returned to college, my goals were more about learning as much as I could than making the best grades. I wasn't an honor student, but I did make good enough grades to stay in school.

I graduated into a recession, which isn't the best time to figure out what you want to do by process of elimination. When you're not in school you have to pay for your own existence, and you do what you gotta do. I door-to-door canvassed for an environmental organization. I remember one night in a college town on the night of a basketball game when people wouldn't even come to the door. I numbered pages for a nuclear plant. I ran the cash register at driver's license station, entered data for home health care and manufacturing firms, or for a state agency. I answered phones at the IRS, I worked at Blockbuster Video.

After four years of that kind of job, I was so bored, my friends took up a collection and bought me a one-way bus ticket out of town. I cashed in my retirement and took my first plane rides to Taiwan, where I taught English in a small town for two years. This was my first job that actually required a college degree.

My experience abroad (and GRE scores when I properly prepared for the exam) helped me get a fellowship and a master's degree. My work since then has included some contract research for the CIA, illustrating a college manual, surveying fraternity members about alcohol use, and drawing maps for a major newspaper.

Eventually, though, I became a middle school teacher. I get a little frustrated with students who do not take responsibility for their own learning and can't seem to bring a sharpened pencil to class. But there are always hairy problems to solve, always challenges.

In my own experience, the most interesting jobs I have had--by far--are the ones that require a college degree.

Heehee! I'm an accountant (a CPA, but not a degreed accountant - my degree's in psych, and I became a CPA later in life), and it's not dull at all! Something different every day, you get to meet a bunch of people, always something to learn. There are accountants who sit in a cubicle and do the same boring thing day after day, but that's just a bad job, not something inherent to the profession.

For the first time, its YOU who gets to decide what you should do.

If you like art, then get involved in art. Don't wait for someone to tell you its ok. Come up with a plan and do it.

But, hedge your bets, not only for you but to please your family, ie get a hard degree, add in some art, pay off your debt - or do not take any on, and then do what YOU want to do.

There are lots of design firms, web firms, industrial design firms, and so on. Go to a design conference. If you cannot pay, then sneak in - crash it. Browse the U and public libraries.

Its ok to live ambiguously. Life does not have to be 100% programmed.

There are a ton of artsy folks who have no hard skills.

And on second thought, an MFA will open as many doors for you as an MBA. Google MFA and business demand.

Check this out.

http://art-design.umich.edu/programs/graduate/mfa_mba

Reminds me of an ongoing conversation I had with a superior in the Navy. This guy had a bad habit of telling me what I "had to" do, so I'd ask him "What happens if I don't?" I was mostly doing it to needle him a little, but finally one day he challenged me on it, and after an impromptu debate, he never told me what I "had to" do again. Once he realized that ignoring his bluster, packing my stuff, and taking the next plane home was a viable option, he came around to the idea that I could choose to do what he asks or not, and he became a little less insistent.