Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Aspergers and Boy Scouts

My son has been diagnosed with Aspergers. He recently moved over from cub scouts to boy scouts. He enjoyed cubs, but is very reluctant to go to meetings and go on the campout outings or any activities with scouts. I go with him as a leader, and plan on going to summer camp, but it is a constant argument and struggle to get him to participate. Once there, he works well with the older boys. Neither one of us is competitive, sports minded or rugged outdoorsmen. I want him to try the activities for the next year, but if it continues to be a struggle, maybe this troop or program is not for him. Does anyone else have experiences with this transition from cubs to scouts?

Welcome Dad1144. You stated that it is a struggle to get him to participate and that he works well with older boys. Does he enjoy himself once he is participating?

Hello. My question is also about whether or not he's enjoying it. There are so many activities out there. If he's given this a good try and it isn't working maybe it would be better to try something he's more enthusiastic about.

Although I have daughters, both were Girl Scouts. My younger one (gifted, borderline Aspergers) never really got into scouts. She did it for several years, but it never really "caught fire". Her older sister (smart, but not highly gifted, and definitely not Aspie) stuck with it all the way through high school and her Gold Award, but the younger one was never that enthused.

Really, my younger one did not truly find activities that she loved until she got to high school. She tried quite a few things over the years, and has finally happily settled into Quiz Bowl, fencing, and Future Problem Solvers for her main extracurriculars. I have to say, she has found more kids like herself (Aspie-like) in those activities that in scouts (or 4H, which she still does, but only projects for the fair... she hates the meetings). I agree with the suggestion that if he has given it a good try and it isn't fitting, let him move to something else.

One suggestion is to give him a list of other things to pick from. When younger daughter wanted to quit her school sport at the end of 9th grade (which I could see was not a great fit for her anyway), I told her she had to do something active, and gave her a list of options. Told her she could come up with things not on the list. Fencing was on my list, and she decided to try that. As mentioned above, it has been a GREAT fit and she really likes it. But as an Aspie kid, it is unlikely she would have come up with the idea on her own.

The main thing that changes in Boy Scouts as the boys progress is the type of activities they're allowed to do based on age. Some trips might have age cut-offs of 12, 13, or 14 years based on how "adventurous" they are. "High adventures" like Philmont and Sea Base have high age cutoffs. If your son doesn't enjoy those "rugged" outdoor activities I'm not sure what difference another year would make. There will just be more of the stuff he doesn't like and not much else will change in terms of content.

A kid with Asperger's often has such a narrow range of interests that letting them choose isn't a good idea; and they need structured social activities to develop the ability to connect with others. Our experience with DS8 is that often things we "make" him do become things he enjoys after some time has gone by.

My feeling is to insist that he do one social group (scouts, 4H, something analogous) and one other activity (in our family it's music, could be a team sport or something else). If he wants to quit scouts, make sure something else is in the mix to keep him socially active with peers.

DeeDee