Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional HELP: constant singing talking moving

I just posted in another section that my DD's assessment was complete. It was done at 4 years 10 months. I am not getting full details until later this week.

The issues that compelled me to have her evaluated are that she had some ADHDish traits. So far the evaluator has told me that she did not diagnose her with anything, but that she is clearly gifted. She did note that she had some ADHD like traits and that we can keep a watch on things.

That sounds good on the surface, but how do I deal with the hurricane? Some days are better, but today was a major energy storm...

My DD often cannot stop talking, often with accents or strange voices, singing, often like a Broadway show tune, loves loud sounds for the sake of sound, is always moving, grabbing, doing sudden movements, etc. ALL DAY LONG. She NEVER stops. She is cranked to HIGH all the time. She also interrupts a lot and seems to need a ton of attention. She also insists on interacting with me a good portion of the day and cannot stop speaking to the point that my head will pound. I feel bad that I cannot handle this level of intensity that many hours, but I have my limits. If I ask her to back off or go in her room and busy herself so I can rest my head, she cannot seem to do it.

She is a sweet, creative, funny child with many good points, but can be overwhelming at times. People on here have given me great advice in the past about finding outside help, but I haven't found anyone. We also have not found a decent academic program so for now, I'd like ideas on how to live better together or at least hear from someone who has been in a similar situation.

Is anyone else experiencing this sort of thing with their child or have you in the past and if so, what helped???????

She goes to OT for sensory seeking, but I don't feel we are making that much progress in slowing down and quieting at various points in the day.

I think that many of the moms here have slowly taught their children to be more self-entertaining. I flunked this area of life and just hooked up the learning computer games when I couldn't take it - so that's one option.

Does she take Martial Arts? I think that might be a great way to burn up energy and learn self mastery. Yoga, Ti Chi and Meditation (for you or for her) both come to mind.

Is she nimble fingered enough to learn to crochet? Or even make potholders or beeswax figures? Clay?

I'm still hoping you'll find a bright highschooler to be a mentor for her.

It's hard to find 'service projects' for preschoolers, but if there are people who need cheering up, having a service project where she makes pictures or writes letters might give her an avenue to make a contribution...

Love and More Love,
Grinity

Hi Grinity,

Thanks for the chuckle. Maybe I need to get her hooked on computer games ;-)

We haven't tried martial arts, but she has done a little bit of yoga and likes it. I could use some meditation / yoga myself.

Your service project idea was interesting. I hadn't thought of that. She could write letters and make cards!

I mostly just needed to post something after a day where she was a tornado in pigtails.

Too Funny - there's my chuckle for the day!
Martial arts is great because they don't care how old the child is and because they develop focus and self control. They might even have some meditation classes at the local studio. I've seen some very serious little peanuts out on the floor and I'm always very thrilled.

Well, that's exactly how my FOUR kids act! Imagine them all singing/humming/talking at once! I've found the key to having them act 'normal' is to tire them out. They're all in sports (swimming, basketball, baseball, soccer), but when there's no sport or they're more hyped than usual, I have them run around in circles for a while. It usually calms them down enough to focus for a while. Also, chewing gum seems to help a lot. I read an article somewhere about a study with high school kids, how it helped them concentrate. Now, I distribute sugarless gum along with school books and pencils (we homeschool). The gum has the double effect of helping them focus and keeping them quiet. Meditation helped me a lot with my oldest, but now I can't get the four of them to relax at the same time. You may be able to get your daughter to, though. I hope some of these ideas help you.

I feel for you Twinkle Toes. My only child is a constant hummer/talker/mover. Books on tape have been suggested before on this forum. That might help for a bit? Good luck!

That's my eldest to a T. Diet helps us enormously, it's a lot of work, but less work than she is off the diet :-). She's still very full on but it's somehow more manageable, so the effort of the diet is SO worth it. I am on my phone and can't post a link easily, so google RPAH elimination diet and / or sue dengate.

I found keeping her busy with lots of play dates and out door time was key at that age. Before she was in school we had a major outing every morning (zoo, museum, swimming, aquarium all happened every week) and then errands and play ground or play dates every afternoon.

Twinkle Toes

My DS10 has been like this his whole life. He is actually now on ADHD meds but we did not go that route until he was actually having peer issues last year due to his intensity.

I will say that a LOT of physical activity works great also but DS is more of a computer/video game kind of guy.

My son was like that at 4 1/2 to around 8. At 4 1/2 I decided to enroll him in a musical theater class and his first musical was Babes in Arms. It was a little embarrassing to hear him singing "That's why the lady is a tramp" while waiting to pay for our groceries. He was a happy kid and the happier he was the more he sang.

He never went to daycare or preschool. He was with me all day long, but I enjoyed it most of the time although I did get tired sometimes, but the tiredness was nothing like I am dealing with now. I didn't realize how good I had it.

In kindergarten he sang in the bathroom and had to be reminded to be quiet because people could hear him outside. He just sang without thinking. I have noticed several other young kids in the musical theater group doing the same thing and it always makes me smile when I remember those days. I miss them. My son is almost 13 now.

I recently found a video of my son at almost 5 when he was rehearsing with the rest of his group and he was constantly bouncing around and fidgeting like he couldn't stand still and I knew it had to be before we discovered his problem with Red Dye #40. He also had some sensory issues but no real behavioral problems. At seven a doctor said some people might think he has ADHD but he doesn't.

At home my son used to follow me to the bathroom and talk to me outside the door. He just loved to talk. When my husband was at work I was the only one for him to talk to.

We found that computer games and video games were the only things that would keep him busy and give me a little bit of time to do other things, for a little while anyway, but when he saw me he always had to tell me what he had been doing on the games and what he had learned and how nice it would be if I would play with him, etc.

My son is so different now and all it took was getting older. He is so calm and seems so mature. People guess that he is older than he is. New people in his musical theater group and at his homeschool co-op describe him as shy and he is now, especially around girls.

His creativity shows up more in his writing now where he uses his wit and humor. He still sings and acts and gets lead roles. He liked to do different accents when he was younger and is very good at doing them now. He can do some really good imitations now.

I did not have the level of intensity with either of my children that you are describing, but I thought I'd share just a little, anyway.

There were times when it seemed like dd's "attention cup" would never be full. That she always wanted more, and it would always be more than I could give her. It was exhausting, even anticipating the amount of energy it was going to take. Honestly, I found myself shrinking away. On the phone, or on the computer or talking to a friend just to get away for a bit. And I think that's normal. But I also found that the days where I would fight that tendency were the days that went better. If I could match her intensity level for a bit... "let's read this story. No, wait, first let's bake something so we can read while the cake is cooking!" If I could maintain the attention and intensity for an extended amount of time, then when it was time for "me time" she would happily comply. It's as if I had to overfill that attention cup before it was "enough".