I can't be of any help b/c now I'm just as confused as you are. Yesterday DS2 cried for 30 minutes hysterically until he fell asleep on the carpet against the wall b/c he didn't want his shoes on. I assumed it was just b/c he's 2. I'm not sure if there is a hard line that distinguishes "normal" age-related behavior from OE.
I've been a lurker for awhile the last few feeks, because we haven't had our son tested yet. But reading through everything, I can relate so much to everyone's posts, I'm getting nervous. But re: this topic, I'm wondering if anyone had the experience I've had. DS4 never had tantrums until he was about 3.5 years. I was thinking it was because he was verbal so early, he never got frustrated about anything - he could just ask for what he wanted. But after 3.5, things have gone crazy! If DS4 doesn't get whatever he wants, he is a terror. I'm having to learn a little late about discipline, I guess, because he was so sweet when younger. I don't know if this is a type of OE or just lack of discipline by me. Either way, it's no fun at all.
Although, on the sensory side, we did have to cut out every tag on every shirt, and make sure the seams in his socks weren't bugging him since he was 1. He still will only wear long sleeve shirts and long pants, even if it's over 90 degrees out!
