NanRos,
Sorry to hear that your son had such a tough time at school. That's really difficult
Reading your post reminded me of a book I read earlier this year (fiction). The title is
Anything But Typical and the narrative is told from the perspective of a student with autism. I mention it because if you read it and see it as similar to your son's experiences, it might be a good teacher gift. Perhaps it would increase understanding/empathy.
Regarding manifestation hearings: I assume you're referring to the manifestation determination process. If so, that kicks in if a student accumulates 10 days of suspension in a school year. Some behavior challenges can be addressed through a behavior intervention plan written into the IEP. However, depending on your Board of Education Policy, there are behaviors that cannot be covered by that plan except through change of placement (which I'm assuming you don't want). If you don't already have a Behavior Intervention Plan in the IEP, you might want to request that the IEP be ammended to include one, with a focus on how behavior will be addressed before it gets to the point of flipping a desk over. You're unlikely to end up with a plan that doesn't require a lengthy removal from the classroom for something like flipping a desk, but often there are supports/responses that can be used before frustration escalates to that point.
A couple of links you might find helpful in talking with the school about how they can better support your son (keeping in mind that these articles address a range of students with autism, they are still full of good info):
http://paulakluth.com/articles/hangingin.htmlhttp://paulakluth.com/articles/calmincrisis.htmlHTH!
