I don't know if I have anything helpful or not, because DS6 is still a perfectionist and always will be, and so am I, but there are a few things I do to try and help.
I remind him over and over of things that he has gotten stuck on before and had to keep practicing and now does better. For example, most any of his Nintendo or PlayStation games were frustrating to him when he got them--now he's at the high levels. So I remind him that he didn't know how to do that game and now he plays it like a pro, and whatever he's trying to do will be the same once he gets the hang of it. Most of the time that will keep him going on something instead of giving up because he isn't perfect at it.
I remind him that the point of school/class/lessons is to be educated coming out, not going in. He gets so mad that he doesn't know something when he first starts on it, and just gives up. We've been having trials and tribulations on a free month's worth of Aleks. He wants me to show him how to do every problem on the assessment so that he won't miss any. I have to keep telling him that it needs to know what he doesn't know yet, so it can teach him.
It's so hard to raise a perfectionist, understanding from the bottom of my heart how he feels because I am the same way. I know how he feels, but I have no idea what to do about it. My mother was the best, but one thing she never managed was to stop me from being the way I am, and I can't seem to stop him from being the way he is either, even knowing how it hurts.
