We have been on a long road with 2 of my 3 children. They are smart but struggle severely with executive function.
Examples: They have completed homework in their folders that they forget to turn in. They do not do basic tasks like put their plates in the sink or brush their teeth without multiple prompts. When I tell them to go put on a shirt and pants it can take 15+ minutes because they stare off into space or twiddle a bit of thread or a Lego they found on the floor. My son stares off into space a lot and forgets where he is walking to while walking. They do not pay attention in class. My daughter can be severely scolded for behavior and 5 minutes later will be sitting alone singing happy Broadway songs. ADHD and Autism spectrum have been ruled out by the psychologist.
On a recent WISC-V test, my son scored in the 99.5% for verbal and 99% for visual/spatial. His processing speed, however, was THIRTEENTH PERCENTILE.
During the same time period, my daughter was assed by the psychologist and she gave false answers. For example, she said she was bullied in Kindergarten. When I asked her about it, she did not seem like she had been caught in a lie. She seemed more like "Well, I was supposed to put something on the paper so I did?" Like as if she understood it to be a creative writing assignment, but she is in the 6th grade so it is unclear to me how she couldn't have understood the intent of the testing.
A thought occurred to me today that perhaps what we are experiencing is extreme imaginative overexcitability. Since my husband and I both work full time, the children have many extracurricular activities, and they struggle with executive function, we have resorted living a very structured, routine based lifestyle. Everything is scheduled and planned in advance to keep us afloat. But, it hasn't "fixed" anything. We are somewhere just over "survival" mode.
My kids seem to live in their own heads. They seem unaware of what is going on around them. I have tried to get tasks accomplished with to do lists and organization. But, if their behavior is a result of imaginative overexcitability, have I been using the wrong tools? If you can't manage to put your dirty dishes in the sink because you keep getting derailed by visions of a robot you are going to build, should I instead try to make putting away dishes more engaging to keep them tuned in? And how on earth is that even possible because doing dishes is just... mundane. And so are many essential tasks.
Should we reduce extracurricular activities (dance, music lessons, and musical theatre) so they have more time to spend in La La Land? Would that give them more energy and focus needed to complete the essential tasks?
Any advice is welcomed. Is there a way I could find a specialized therapist who could help us with this?
Thank you.
