I went on a field trip with DS10's class recently, and was sad to see that DS wasn't mixing with the other kids. Most were ignoring him, actively avoiding him, or rolling eyes/ walking away when he was trying to join in. No one sat next to him on the bus and he stated that when he was sitting in the back, some of the other boys took his souvenir from the field trip and broke it. Apparently, during another class trip, a few of the other boys took his items and wouldn't give them back.
DS has ADHD and some social language impairments + he's gifted and has the different interests and academic achievements. All of this is serving to make him seem odd to other kids. The social skills are a big issue because I know DS doesn't read cues well- he doesn't know when things aren't funny or what topics might interest typical ten year old boys. Not blaming him for the bullying obviously, but I do understand why most kids might be turned off by him.
We need some help- at the very least, I need some ideas of how to talk with DS. I was treated similarly at his age--my responses are not as encouraging because I think it is very hard to change or stop social exclusion. I tend to tell him to ignore it, and tell the teacher when it crosses the line to taking or breaking his things. It also becomes a big tangle of his word against the word of other children, and DS doesn't articulate well. He's not quick with comebacks and makes it worse by "overtalking" or saying something to bring on further derision.
Teachers will eventually decide that the excluded child is the problem because quite honestly, they can't force other kids to like or include that child. I went to the school previously and little is done.
Thoughts on what to say or how to deal? His self esteem is suffering and it's obvious that he is trying to avoid other kids because he feels rejected.
Last edited by cammom; 04/29/17 10:09 AM.
