I would let it all go and not stress about any of this. Attend or not attend - it doesn't matter that much. I have gone to many award ceremonies and also skipped many others over the years. Just communicate with your DS so he is on board with your decision and what you believe.
Assuming that your DS is in elementary, keep in mind that these ceremonies are a great way for the parents to chat with each other.
At the same time, I do get what you are feeling. I mentally cringed every time I was invited to and attended a "Scholars Reception" for my oldest DS when he made the "Honor Roll" in high school. He is disabled (has significant brain damage, etc.) and only got those grades because I helped him. The "honor" was meaningless and rather ironic but the applause (nice students) made him happy so I attended.
