Thank you, you have hit the point that is troubling DH: we're not in the US, and they happen not to be legally obliged to do anything to meet his needs but teach the same lockstep curriculum they teach to every other kid - but they are trying to be supportive, and DH worries about rocking the boat, as it were.
We do not need them in case we want DS to skip into fifth grade in middle school this fall, but right now I am leaning far away from that one. (Info night for fourth graders is on the 23rd, and I am planning to bring DS8 so he'll get an idea of what's out there). So we need their good will to keep DS as happy as possible for this year and the next.
The easy and unexcited way they have agreed to implement SSA in maths eve though they had that sorry excuse of a school psych insisting that DS must be an average kid hothoused into overachievement is one thing that we'd like to keep going just as it is! And if we want to implement something for next year,we may need even more good will. So,I'm treading carefully. I want to send a follow up email and I want to get it just right. No, I'm not a perfectionist or anything...
I have asked whether the teacher will help by giving DS extra "prompts" or reminders, but she refused,stating it would hurt his social standing too much being singled out like this. With the conference, she has explained that now she has agreed do clear targets with each kid, she has begun just to remind them of "your target!" And claims that so far with the others,it has worked wonders. Let's see what it does for DS...
For what to do at home: believe me,I've got the book, I've got all the books and I've read them too. It's all reward schemes, and they all completely backfire with my kids. They immediately start using it on us parents and the resulting arguments drive as all nuts. The one thing that works, a bit, is Kazdins method, and only if I do NOT implement it the consistent way you're supposed to, but keep introducing new stuff, letting go if one thing, starting another, to keep them interested and on their toes. I'll reread smart but scattered, and try to keep an open mind, but am not holding out great hopes...
And I do not think that she is conflating EF with mastery as far as language arts are concerned, only she does not believe greater challenge according to the latter might help with the former. It's just that with math and science, DS' gifts and needs are SO obvious, you need to WANT to overlook them and she didn't, which I think is great. I believe that with LA, it hurts DS that there are bright girls in class who are up to one year older and probably are much more obvious in showing their gifts than he is. So, she's thinking (I'm guessing) he's not "the best." Why would he need more?
