That's not really dissing a family that does right by their kids like this... it's just... if the media came knocking and asked US what our secret sauce recipe was? (And.. um-- sometimes they have, actually)
We politely demur and thank them for their positive interest, but it's idiosyncratic and private-- and about OUR KID, not our "method."
Is it so idiosyncratic or mysterious? The average IQ of the children of two PhDs is probably in the 120s, and they are much more likely to have children with IQs >= 145 than parents with average IQ of 100.
Right, but there's not a good self-help book or national news story in THAT...
And this goes to Colinsmum's notation here-- a sense of agency might lead one to frame the experience of raising an HG child as "it could happen to anyone" and "perfectly normative... kinda, anyway" when that's actually not so.
I've seen my daughter's classmates. Even the bright ones had NO business in college level material
in general at 10-12yo. At 15 or 16, in their areas of passion? Of course. Those kids are mostly MG and some higher LOG.
There's a difference, though, and I think that these parents in particular probably live in a bit of a bubble to see their kids (and their parenting experiences) as "anyone could do this."
Someone else here once shared the experience of thinking that
all preschoolers could (naturally!) learn to read quite readily, and attempted to teach a friend's seemingly quite bright and interested child (upon the parent's request). Eye opening, that was the ultimate assessment.
Moments like that are what lead me to say that NOPE, not all kids can do this.
The better question (and what I asked before, even) is why on earth parents would want them to. They aren't attending high-powered colleges... not even what I'd call "excellent" ones. Parents have admitted that they are "decent" rather than "excellent" students at those colleges. We discussed average ACT/SAT ranges at those institutions-- they are low enough that none of them is a place I'd send my DD14 into, for the simple reason that she would hate it because it would be "high school, part two."
I think that they get to decide what is right for their family, but honestly-- my DD has enough trouble with people she makes feel insecure thinking (and saying) that if THEY were homeschooled... THEY could be (or their kids could)
just like her. Okay-- that always comes across as a slam on
her-- that she's weird BECAUSE of what we've done to her, or that we chose to put her in an educational Bonsai pot or something, and that ALL children are of course capable of advanced algebra, organic chemistry, ripping into Alice Walker's rhetorical devices, or writing a well-researched paper that examines the role of the British patriarchy in civil unrest in 18th century India...
several years before they are legally of age to operate a motor vehicle in the U.S.;
but my experience suggests quite strongly that this is simply not true.
I don't know, my experience on this one might be colored quite strongly by the fact that we live in a bubble of high-ish IQ kids, and a LOT of parents who are seriously invested in those kids' accomplishments. I have no doubt that a good 3-5% of the kids in our town could be MADE to do all that these siblings have done. It squicks me out to think that there could be some pressure to do things that way, in addition to the already-pronounced trend toward TigerParenting with an eye toward HIGH achievement. I have already seen how that kind of mentality in parents
can edge toward what I consider damaging/abusive. High standards are great.
Realistic ones are far better, though.
