Some field trips sites would also be no-no's, gyms and some other after-school activities, etc. Most of the time, it's places where adults would never even know about the prohibition (adults having significantly better judgment than to pull out a phone in a locker room, KWIM?) So, sort of like school.
It's also particularly important to emphasize to kids with camera phones that what they send is pretty much PUBLIC at that point... and that anything inappropriate is a violation of federal statutes and that there HAVE been cases of kids being prosecuted for what they thought were "joke" photos.
"Look, it's my butt" is "child porn" in the wrong perspective, KWIM?
I don't know of any software-- but I agree that Aspies in particular may have trouble with the medium of texting, socially speaking. DD's ex-boyfriend STILL occasionally texts her and it's been well over a year. He absolutely inundated her with texts for a long time-- as many as 50-60 DAILY until she specifically told him "do not text me any more." (Even that was apparently a "suggestion" rather than a prohibition... so while this is an N of one, other parents of Aspie boys have definitely identified with that particular story and used it to talk to their sons about appropriate social boundaries, which are pretty undefined surrounding texting.)
Like Cricket, our rule is that we can ALWAYS read DD's messages. (This also applies to Skype, e-mail and Facebook.) We don't, always-- but we CAN. Without notice.
We did keep tabs on her for a while. Basically, I still do if something makes my radar twinge.
(This is how I determined that she was being reeled in by a peer who was/is indubitably a person with classic NPD. Heaven knows that kid was not showing ME what he was up to with HER. There are definitely some peers even in young adolescents who are bad, bad news.)
I know of no tracking software for Android or Windows phones, certainly. Not sure if iPhone has something.
Our rule there was "you have to hand ME your phone if you need to delete messages." If you delete messages (and we CAN see that indirectly through Verizon) then you'll lose the privileges associated with having your phone. (This is carefully phrased because the bottom line is that when she isn't with us, she HAS to have a working cell phone.)
Some excellent advice here.
