If anyone has experienced something similar and has advice for me, please share. Thanks!!!
We considered a grade skip for DS10 (Asperger's), and didn't do it. We have accelerated him in math, and are considering a significant science acceleration, but he will enter middle school as a regular young-for-grade 6th grader next year.
We have found that the 7th graders with whom he takes math (2-3 years ahead in age) are kind to him, but do not consider him a friend in any sense. He does contribute meaningfully to that class, and I think that it's been very good for him to have intellectual peers. At the same time, their topics of before-school and between-classes conversation are not always understandable to or appropriate to him (we have had to have discussions about why you cannot call girls "hot," for example). I'm glad he's still spending a lot of his time with age-peers for that reason.
We also battle DS's relatively young social skills in thinking about his placement-- he is now doing a lot of thinking about how he relates to other people, but he doesn't always see that being smarter than many doesn't necessarily make you socially successful. I don't want his academic acceleration ("I'm smarter than other people and years ahead in every subject") to be a foundation of his identity.
At the same time, there is no doubt that he behaves better, is happier, and is more tuned in when the material is at the right level (which is still rare for him).
There is no one easy answer for this.
DeeDee
