DS8 is in his sixth year at a gem of a school here. He started at age 3 at a private Montessori and in now in the 1-3rd level class. There are so many things I love about this school- and the director and teachers. But we are still struggling with how to get him (and keep him) motivated in the environment.
At this point he is working above grade level and is making academic progress, but all while keeping up a pretty lackadaisical pace and having a work ethic that leaves much to be desired. His teachers and I all know he could really soar if he could just get to work. He seems to walk a pretty narrow path between works that he finds too easy and therefore not worth doing with any speed and works that he finds too hard and therefore procrastinates starting (he's one of those perfectionists that fears works that he may not be able to conquer with ease).
In the past year, we'd tried explaining to him that he couldn't progress a grade level without showing age appropriate work habits. This was fine because the academic level of the work he gets is not tied to the "grade" he's in. It didn't work though- he got "held back" and continued on his way, a little pouty. They've offered him chances to direct his own week (led to a week of no work), have exciting projects as carrots at the end of the week (led to amazing work for one week and then a decision that it wasn't worth it the next week), and more. The director is at a loss. He CAN work hard. He just often chooses not to.
DH is annoyed and thinks we ought to just let him fail. But how does a gifted kid fail in the Montessori environment?!? There are no grades. The director has admitted that even if he stood on his head for the rest of the year she'd want to send him to the 4-6 grade class next year because he *needs* that curriculum. If he keeps up his frankly lazy work habits he wont get behind- he just wont meet his potential. The only option they've come up with is having him stay late one day a week to finish up work that was on his plan that he didn't do. This doesn't seem to have a huge effect but it seems fair to me- although DH is opposed to it because he thinks it's just another safety net DS is abusing.
I wondered if anyone else had dealt with a kid like this and had any ideas. He is a great kid- and he doesn't have any issues that are making it hard for him to work hard (as evidenced by the spectacular performances he turns in when he's in the mood.) But I am exhausted with trying to get him to understand that playing with a pencil all day is not ok!
