I wanted to second the idea that it helps for parents to really get involved with other parents. I have a very shy, introverted DS14 and we've worked hard to get him into an environment (smaller school) where he feels confident and competent. He tried sports, but they weren't for him, so he kind of fell out of the social scene. And, since it was a new school for him and I didn't know any of the parents, we didn't ever get together with other families. But, when I started really making an effort to talk to the other parents (and I, myself, am shy and introverted), those parents started suggesting to their kids that my DS be included in social acitivities outside of school. And, when we were hanging out with parents, they tended to be of like-mind, so their kids tended to be more of like-mind with my son. And, because it was families hanging out with families, the kids were kind of forced to spend time together and get to know one another. Now, I'm not going to say that my son is now uberpopular and involved in a huge group of friends (he is introverted, afterall), but he is occasionally trying new things outside of school and feels like he has friends in school.
