I suppose this is a rhetorical question and a bit of a rant, but what DO YOU DO when it's not ADHD/ODD/ASD or any of those other "misdiagnoses" and it IS JUST gifted behavior? That's what frustrates me about vidoes like this. I don't understand what else to DO.
I've heard Dr. Webb speak about this before. In his book, for example, he talks about power struggles. His advice? Just avoid them! Huh!
Sorry to get off track. It is a good lecture and very informative.
Gee, clearly, then, I've been doing it all wrong...
I guess this is where the British ultimately erred with Mahatma Ghandi, as well, then. They should have just "avoided" making that one a power struggle. Simple!
Laughing at the notion that one
could manage to avoid all power struggles with a highly manipulative, highly intelligent, intrinsically motivated and self-deterministic child.
Trust me when I say that even conflict-avoidant
doormat-like parents have trouble avoiding power struggles with such children.
Er... don't ask, actually.
In all seriousness, I'm glad that there are people carrying this banner and railing against the over-pathologizing of every quirk and idiosynchrony, of course. This is a really important message.
I just don't think that the clinical perspective necessarily captures some of the-- um-- more
interesting aspects of life with a PG kiddo with a challenging disposition. I also wish that there were clearer answers to those moments of parental panic that we all have-- you know, the ones where you think "OMG! Is this
normal?? Er-- I mean, is it something that I should try to DO something about?? Er-- I mean,
what the heck CAN I DO here?"
So what
do you do with a child who has mulishly decided that the SAT just "isn't something that I plan to make a big deal over" when that child is 12 or 13 and truly lacks some ability to see the ramifications in the big picture?? Accept a score in the 80th percentile just because they don't feel like going to the trouble of doing better? Or push as hard as necessary until the child performs at potential (or closer to it, anyway)?
