How does one foster pride in special talents without fostering elitism? And how young were your kids when you started to discuss this stuff with them?
We started at age 3 in preschool talking about how everyone develops at different rate - some are taller early, and some taller later - in regard to 'mouth speakers' since some of the kids there 'wouldn't talk to him' and he was taking to totally personally - but the teachers explained to me that they just didn't talk to anyone yet. I carfully avoided the question that some people eventually grow to be taller than other. I don't think intelligence is the kind of thing that you can line people up 'shortest to tallest' so maybe that's a bad analogy anyway.
Later I read books about parenting gifted children and tried to praise effort and interest, rather than the natual abilities, which don't grow character when being used. I think character development is the key challenge for all parents, and that a child's readiness has to be provided for out of decency. Two totally different things, but ignoring the readiness level will certianly mess up the Character Development!
While I was growing up, one of my favorite expressions was - "You play the hand you are dealt." To me it allowed me to make a positive judgement about anyone if I could respect how they made us of the opportunities that did come their way. The 'cards' of life are just not distributed fairly, although in real card games, one can usually have about equal 'lucky' and 'unlucky' hands. So I would suggest playing lots of card games and teaching your child to judge themselves on how they played, rather on the luck aspect. I think this takes a while to develop, but I love games like 'Set-back' for that reason.
Best Wishes,
Grinity
