Other background for him - he is a sweet kid, but one who has never made a real friend. He has no "special connections" with anyone, but has lots of "acquaintances". He is 8 and is just learning to swim and refuses to try to ride a bike. He is very anxious about failing, gets frustrated extremely easily, and seems very "angry" a lot of the time.
When asked to do simple tasks such as brush his teeth, he will throw himself on the floor and whine and moan. When asked again, he will slowly crawl his way toward where he needs to be. When given a firm tone and consequences for not doing what was asked, he will then get angry, yell at us, and storm away (and go do what we asked!). We have no idea what is setting him off or why he can't seem to do simple things such as get dressed in the morning....
...If anyone has any ideas for us as to whether or not he sounds like a "typical" mild Aspergers child or Inattentive ADD child or whether it seems like something else, and what to do for him, we are all ears!
Hi, Roonil, welcome.
Pretty typical Aspergers. (The "mild" designation isn't in the DSM-- and for most families, the challenges that come with Aspergers are serious, no matter how smart the kid is. Sometimes doctors say "mild" to make families feel better and to recognize that the child's IQ is unaffected.) Asperger's kids have attention issues: I've never found it that significant to add in ADHD as a diagnosis for ours, but we do treat attention as part of the Asperger's.
You asked about medication. Meds have done wonders for our DS9-- but only in tandem with fairly intensive ABA (behavior therapy). I'd suggest finding someone in your area to help you with this: it was absolutely life-changing for us. People with Asperger's can learn to be compliant with instructions, and it's a great gift to them, because it helps them fit in much better and makes them more independent. But it's a lot of work (as you have noticed).
If you want to find a specialist, there's a list of resources and a good parent forum at
http://www.aspergersyndrome.org . (The link to the list of docs is in the upper left corner of the home page.)
We found that the teacher in our gifted program was very tolerant of the behavioral quirks and disorganization that come with AS, and the smaller class size has been great for DS. However, some people have found it goes the other way-- in places where the gifted teacher isn't prepared to deal with a difficult child, these kids either don't get identified, or get pushed out of the program, which is a terrible experience and deprives them of appropriate work. So IMO it's important to use behavior therapy to change his behavior so that he can participate fully and take advantage of what school is offering.
Feel free to send me a private message with more questions.
DeeDee
