I have to hypothesize, however-- (based upon my experience of parenting a kid who is a social prodigy)-- that it is entirely possible that motivation becomes less overt as one moves up in IQ. In other words, the higher someone's IQ, the more probable that they can HIDE a lack of intrinsic motivation or cooperation.
Wow, it sounds like you are parenting my younger dd -- lol! I often find myself thinking that her interpersonal skills and significant extraversion are not all positive. She's so aware of what she perceives from others that she'll appear to be whatever it is she feels others want her to be. I, too, see a checked out child b/c I know what she looks like when she's engaged, but to most people she appears cooperative, polite, and on task.
