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Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 145
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Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 145 |
It is such a relief to see that others are also in the same situation. This has been such a good source of ideas for me. I think we'll start off by enforcing more limits (DS also has a horrible habit of interrupting as well), incentives, audiobooks, chores, and possibly instruments as well. We're still working on reading, and I'm even starting to leave the house to exercise when DH comes home (mommy time!). Most structured out of the home activities will probably have to wait until summer though. These are great! I think I'll order story of the world soon to start off. I was going to use it for car rides, but why not at home too?
Life is the hardest teacher. It gives the test first and then teaches the lesson.
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Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 669
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Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 669 |
It is such a relief to see that others are also in the same situation. This has been such a good source of ideas for me. I think we'll start off by enforcing more limits (DS also has a horrible habit of interrupting as well), incentives, audiobooks, chores, and possibly instruments as well. We're still working on reading, and I'm even starting to leave the house to exercise when DH comes home (mommy time!). Most structured out of the home activities will probably have to wait until summer though. These are great! I think I'll order story of the world soon to start off. I was going to use it for car rides, but why not at home too? I used to not wait until their dad got home and would put the kids n the kid care at the gym (free) and then go into the locker room and read a book or take a shower in peace....sometimes I even worked out. 
...reading is pleasure, not just something teachers make you do in school.~B. Cleary
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Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 448
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Joined: Aug 2013
Posts: 448 |
DS is now 7.5 and I totally get what you're saying. We did many of the ideas above and we also bought a tablet at Christmas which DH loaded up with educational stuff (Quirks and Quarks podcasts, Vi Hart videos, Numberphile videos, and many more that I'm forgetting). We don't use it often but when his intense questioning can't be immediately handled we bring it out to keep him occupied. Being bombarded by Vi Hart for 15 min helps fulfill his need for learning  The Cosmos series is a weekly highlight in our house and is a nice break for everyone. I second the mommy time! I'm an introvert and I find I have to make sure that I make the time to get out and go for a run or do something similar so I can be at my best for him. When I don't take care of myself, it makes everything much more challenging. ETA - Love it sweetie!!!
Last edited by chay; 04/17/14 07:19 AM.
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Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 337
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Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 337 |
Like Val and MumOfThree, we too enforced limits to the endless talking and questioning. My view is that while clearly this is caused in part by her LOG, it's also inappropriate, rude, and annoying. When she was tiny we'd play 'the quiet game' or 'telephone' (which involved us talking on an imaginary phone about some elaborate imaginative scenario of her devising). Telephone was practice in taking turns, waiting (I'd let my "phone" ring a long time before answering), and conversational norms.
As she got older we were more direct. At one point, in desperation, I sat her down and told her outright that DH and I needed uninterrupted time to communicate for the ongoing health of our marriage. We've also reminded her that not everything is her business and that everyone has the right to speak and be heard. Currently (at age 11) we are working on pausing when you enter the room to see if a conversation is in progress before launching into whatever she's come in to say.
Honestly, I'm a huge talker (look how long this short reply is) and prone to interrupting others. It's a kind of conversational over-intensity that I've had since I was young. It's also very off-putting to others and can cause issues with both social and professional relationships. I've worked hard to overcome this tendency through my teenage years and into adulthood and I'd like her to have a head start on it.
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Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 3,299 Likes: 2
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Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 3,299 Likes: 2 |
Honestly, I'm a huge talker (look how long this short reply is) and prone to interrupting others. It's a kind of conversational over-intensity that I've had since I was young. It's also very off-putting to others and can cause issues with both social and professional relationships. I've worked hard to overcome this tendency through my teenage years and into adulthood and I'd like her to have a head start on it. Yes, this. Emphatically.
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Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 5,181
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Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 5,181 |
As Val and Ivy both stated. This is a life skill for those with this particular facet of giftedness.
(I'm told that I was an insufferable child in this respect-- and my mother deeply enjoyed the child that I was blessed with... I think her exact words may have been a gleeful "I've waited over thirty years for this moment!")
It can (and most emphatically SHOULD) be tamed. I have excellent social skills now. But boy howdy did I ever have to learn (the hard way) not to let my mouth get ahead of my impulse control.
Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,007
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Joined: Jul 2011
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It can (and most emphatically SHOULD) be tamed. I have excellent social skills now. But boy howdy did I ever have to learn (the hard way) not to let my mouth get ahead of my impulse control. I went with the not talking whenever possible option. It's much safer for me that way.
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Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 71 Likes: 1
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Joined: Feb 2014
Posts: 71 Likes: 1 |
I see I'm not the only one with a chatter monkey! I totally understand the mental exhaustion. My son is Gerald McBoing Boing most days and it drives me insane. What I do is frankly tell him he's bothering me. It sounds mean, but he doesn't really understand that it IS annoying and distracting. I'm an introvert myself and need my quiet time too. He's learned that if I have a book cracked, he should not be disturbing me. I tell him just because he thinks it in his brain doesn't mean it has to come out of his mouth  I can't find a reference, but I either recently read or heard on TV that kids who chatter and make noises can have an OCD thing going on. Meaning the humming, chatterboxing, and other noises are a way they self-soothe. If I can ferret out a link, I'll post.
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Joined: Jul 2013
Posts: 157
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Joined: Jul 2013
Posts: 157 |
This is hard to explain, but you have to (if you can) go with it, see all the positives, keep focusing on the positives, force yourself into high energy mode and know and remember that it is temporary.
The child will grow and mature. At some point not too far away, the students' maturity level will take a large jump and the child will self-direct even more and probably won't need you (and that might sting in another way).
Think short-term if that makes you feel better. Think long-term if that makes you feel better. It is a really weird and interesting experience because no one else can really tell what is happening, what you are going through, what you are experiencing.
It is like an extra-long marathon, you know you have to keep running, you can't find the other runners. You don't see the finish line, news cameras, water aides or officials. You might not even have any friends or family there supporting you. You just have to keep running.
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 2,035
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If they are driving you crazy take them to the park. That is why I get annoyed sometimes by comments about how sad/bad it is that parents are playing with their phones at the park instead of interacting with their kids. I am all interacted out - this is the closest thing I am going to get to a break today. When I was a child I don't remember needing an adult to go to the playground and they certainly didn't feel they needed to entertain me all the time.
Oops. Guesss I hit my own sensitive spot.
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