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    Joined: Jun 2008
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    Do you see this as an issue due to giftedness (your ds)? In that case, connecting with other kids in general is something that might be difficult across the board. Are there issues at school as well?

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    Originally Posted by kcab
    I would talk to him about it and try to figure out what is going through his head. For my son, the problem was basically a mismatch between what he thought was fun and interesting and what the typical Sunday school teacher of early elementary kids thinks. In other words, coloring was NOT a fun activity. I tried keeping him in adult services and that sometimes worked, though it brought its own set of issues. There wasn't an easy solution though. In our church, the material in older grades is much more interesting.

    Agreed with the above, we experienced the same thing with our eldest DS. He always looked at the coloring and "fun" activities as busy work (the same as word searches at public school)

    In his 5th-8th grade years I volunteered as a SS teacher. I found that the way the material was presented was on average boring and simplistic for the majority of the students. I spoke with the SS Superintendent (a former public school teacher) about looking into using different curriculum, though I don't think that ever came about.

    The problem extended into confirmation classes in the middle school years. The breadth and depth just wasn't there, especially after the first year. I spoke with the Pastor who taught the class about differentiation, he quickly dismissed the idea. I understand that God's word is appropriate education for all, however, the Pastor failed to understand that breadth and depth in teaching it needs to change in order to keep different abilities engaged just as it needs to with adults. Eventually both our sons moved to the Youth Group (HS Bible Study) and when they became bored there I gave them the option of attending adult Bible study with me.

    I think the lesson here is that we have a difficult enough time trying to get institutions that have teachers and administrations with degrees or advanced degrees in education to understand the needs of gifted / highly gifted children, it stands to reason then that hoping that an institution with a mostly volunteer staff and few or no degrees in education isn't going to either.

    As parents who both understand the special needs of our children best and wish them to be educated in the religion of our choice, it's up to us to ensure that education is provided, even if that means unconventional means (children in adult Bible study, home study, etc.) Just like with other aspects of a GT child's education, we do what we have to in order to keep them engaged and learning, that often means special accommodations few understand, perhaps including clergy.

    Last edited by Old Dad; 01/14/14 06:52 AM.
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    In response to the other thread, I locked this one because I have had to shut down 90% of the threads in the past that veered off into religion/politics and probably jumped the gun a bit. I am re-opening it, but will delete posts that get off topic and will not hesitate to ban members if they get disrespectful.

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    Mark

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    My kids are lucky that through a quirk of fate about half the kids in their Sunday School class are hg at least.

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    Thank you, Mark. smile


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    Originally Posted by Old Dad
    I think the lesson here is that we have a difficult enough time trying to get institutions that have teachers and administrations with degrees or advanced degrees in education to understand the needs of gifted / highly gifted children, it stands to reason then that hoping that an institution with a mostly volunteer staff and few or no degrees in education isn't going to either.

    Well said, Old Dad.

    Our DS very much disliked the Sunday School projects, songs, the jolly chaos, and the sweet, happy messages. He happily joined adult worship at age 5 and has been enjoying it in the years since.

    mumofone, good luck finding a way to share your religion and religious community with your son. Let us know how it goes!

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    Also LDS here and in South Africa. My 7 year old has learnt to just deal with the classes and then saves all his tricky conversations/questions up and books interviews with various other adult ward members who will sit and talk to him.

    My 5 year old (November) has this exact same problem as yours. Last year it got so bad he asked to homeschool Primary. He was coming into my classes to find me up to 20 times each week. Eventually I sat with him and I could see the problem immediately. The Primary President suggested putting him into the next class up - but it didn't work as the kids there and the teacher made him feel even worse with snarky comments etc.

    This year he has a lovely teacher (his regular class) and I sat in the first lesson and then chatted to her. I was just open and honest with her and she expressed excitement in having him in her class and asked for recommendations on how to help him feel more connected with the class and more included. I gave her some and am preparing some printed out stuff to take to her this coming Sunday.

    I have already spoken to the Bishop and mentioned that I am happy to be called as a teacher to teach him (and I said that I would gladly teach any other kids currently unwilling to attend their classes).

    I have the January issue with Dylan, who will be 3 on the 21st Jan. He is expected to remain in Nursery till next year, but he is starting to read and write now already. He is enjoying being the big kid for now, but I am not sure how long this will be a viable solution for.

    I have to say that we have started taking the Primary lessons and building it into our homeschooling and Family Home Evening lessons for more in-depth discussions. It seems to work well for now and it means that if they just want to see Sunday as a big jolly social event then that is fine too.

    I don't really have solutions to offer - just wanted to share our story and say that I hear you and understand.


    Mom to 3 gorgeous boys: Aiden (8), Nathan (7) and Dylan (4)
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    I guess my big thing here is... is he getting anything out of the class? I mean, if he already knew the material but was enjoying the happy-fun-crafty-chaos aspect (I can see my 5 y/o reacting this way), then he'd be getting something out of it. If he weren't exactly having fun, but was learning something new, then he'd be getting something out of it. If he's just going to go, not to learn anything new and not to enjoy himself, then I guess it's a parental decision as to whether it's worth it on a spiritual/religious requirement level.

    Granted, I don't know much about the LDS faith or religious structure, but it seems like religious education should up a child's (a) knowledge, (b) faith, or (c) happiness (preferably all three). If it's not doing any of the three for a given child, and it's just a requirement because it's a requirement, then I'd probably be more swayed by the kid's argument and find some kind of alternate arrangement for the year (assuming that's "allowed," again I have no knowledge of the bureaucratic processes involved). What does the church do when a child is cognitively delayed to a point where regular religious education classes aren't working? There has to be some kind of precedent...

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