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    Joined: Jan 2012
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    Hi. I'm new to this forum and am looking for a bit of advice and support. My son started reading when he was 26 months old (or 2 years, 2 months). I did not push this on him; he mostly taught himself. Before he turned three (a couple of weeks ago), he was reading Frog and Toad books and Beatrix Potter books (such as The Tale of Squirrel Nutkin) on his own rather fluently. I'm writing this here because I don't really know what this means. He's my only son and it's hard for me to gauge where he's at. Like another poster here, I've looked at the Ruf Estimates and I really think it's much too early to tell. I also don't feel that I can talk to many of my friends about this because it may make them feel inadequate, competitive, or judgmental, etc. Who wants to hear someone whine about their smart kid?

    I suppose the main reason I'm writing is because I'm really concerned about education. My very bright husband got kicked out of a gifted program in the 80s and ended up becoming a high school drop out. So, I want to do whatever I can to help my son succeed, as I recognize that high intelligence comes with many problems, anxieties, etc. (speaking of which, is it possible that my 3-year-old already has an anxiety disorder? We joke that he's going to grow up to become Woody Allen...).

    Does anyone out there have any insight on very early readers? Are there any good educational options out there (noting that I'm currently in southern California)?

    Thank you!

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    Hi. DS (just 4) is exactly the same. We worry too about how the fit with school will happen. I have doing lots of reading about gifted Ed and started approaching local schools. In the meantime we have spent time encouraging gross motor skills as well as writing, as I know that we will be looking at acceleration and figure it all helps.
    DS has anxiety/perfectionism issues also!

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    I can't say I have any answers, but I share your concerns. My son isn't quiet as advanced as yours, but he taught himself to read a little before three and is now reading at about a second grade level (at 3 years 10 months). I find myself making excuses for my son's reading ("we didn't push him," "I didn't use Hooked on Phonics or Your Baby Can Read," etc.)

    I've done some reading around early readers. What I've found is that some early readers end up being labeled "gifted" (but not all) and not all gifted kids are early readers. For early readers, often times they do not got the support they need in school to continue to grow. (I have a reference, but I can't find it at the moment. I'll post again when I find it!) Gifted Child Today had an article in 2008 that addresses similar issues called "Reading Instruction with Gifted and Talented Readers: A Series of Unfortunate Events or a Sequence of Auspicious Results" that addresses similar issues.

    As for schooling, we're moving our son from a traditional age-graded preschool to a multi-age Montesori preschool because the "letter of the day" format for reading (B says "b." Let's list the words that begin with b.) was not supporting him. We also found he was beyond his same-age peers in mathematics.

    Some posters have noted that their gifted children have "outgrown" the Montessori program quickly, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

    As for schooling, we live in a upper-middle class community where their is a lot of emphasis on doing well in school. We are planning on having our child tested before kindergarten so we will have some evidence to bring to discuss an appropriate placement. I'm not sure grade skipping will be an option, but we may advocate that he be allowed to do reading and/or math with another grade, should it be warranted. I think the formal test results will be necessary to combat the "all parents think their child is gifted" mentality.

    I think a three year old can definitely have anxieties. Our son went through a period around age 3 1/2 when he was very anxious about not being at home. While stopping preschool was not an option, we made a concerted effort to pull back on both the extra-curriculars and the amount of time we were away from home. Even the "fun" things like the children's museum seemed to overwhelm him. (I think he has some sensory integration things going on, so it makes sense.)

    Hope this helps...and good luck!
    Kathie

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    Originally Posted by mcswones
    Hi. I'm new to this forum and am looking for a bit of advice and support. .. (speaking of which, is it possible that my 3-year-old already has an anxiety disorder? We joke that he's going to grow up to become Woody Allen...).
    Thank you!
    My son wasn't an early reader, but did turn out to be gifted, was an early worrier. By 4 he was thinking and talking about death quite a bit. Learn some calming breathing practices,and practice them yourself. Then teach him. Try to develop that 'life is a journey, and who know what riches of experience lie just beyond the horizon' life philosophy, and then teach him.

    It's ok to make a family motto or credo that highlights this, and repeat it a lot. Even a gifted, reading 3 year old is susceptible to conditioning.

    As for school, is homeschooling a 'fall back option?' If you have it in your 'back pocket' you'll sleep easier. Usually half day kindergarten programs are ok even with a terrible fit. So you have some time. Don't rush into preschool - unless the family needs it. Join your state gifted association and start hanging out with other families of gifted kids.

    BTW - my 'home IQ test' is this: If you kid is advanced enough that you don't want to share his highlights with your friends, chances are he's gifted. Notice that other parents are only too happy to brag away, regardless of the effect on other parents.

    So glad you found us - relax, enjoy, tell us some cute stories. These are the golden days.
    Smiles,
    Grinity


    Coaching available, at SchoolSuccessSolutions.com
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    Originally Posted by Grinity
    BTW - my 'home IQ test' is this: If you kid is advanced enough that you don't want to share his highlights with your friends, chances are he's gifted. Notice that other parents are only too happy to brag away, regardless of the effect on other parents.


    Love this "test"...I've found myself wondering why I'd be more than happy to brag if my son scored a goal at soccer, but I make excuses for his academic gifts!

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    My DD, i don't know to call her early reader, she spend basically first 3 yeras with grandparents, came back after 3rd birthday. First 6 months or so in montessori, I can say she barely understood a thing. (grandparents do not speak English).then within a year she was reading very fluently. she spent a total of 2 years in montessori (which caters age 3-6, including K) and based on teachers suggestions and our own observation, we approached school and was tested and advised to skip K. It worked beautifully to her. Couple of points favourable for her though- DD mom was handwriting fanatic and tought her beautiful handwriting, looking at her handwriting, principal and other teachers beleived that she is well rounded and they never hesitated..
    2nd point is her height and weight are 85th percentile and unless we tell, it is difficult to know she is a year younger. she is june birthday and now 6 and in 2nd grade.
    As Bobbie pointed out, one can work on motor skills and handwriting---just a suggestion...
    for montessori, DD was 'student helper', when teacher needed to solve 2 students issues at the same time, teacher used to deal one and sent DD to deal with the other student. Other parents after watching DD doing this, they never complained and kinda liked DD a lot..

    Last edited by yannam; 01/06/12 06:49 PM.
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    I had the same worries as you - my dd started reading around her 2nd birthday, and just took off like a rocket. At 2.5, she started pausing before reading each sentence aloud, to take a moment to sort out the inflection. She had that mastered in a week. By age 4, she no longer wanted dh or I to read aloud to her, because we were too slow :-( Her silent reading speed shot past dh's and mine after a couple more years.

    I remember freaking out with worry about schooling when she was 2yo, but then thinking that maybe the early reading was a fluke and that it was really just that, early reading. Well, it turned out not to be a fluke. And from what I've learned since, I think it is very likely that most very early readers turn out to be extremely bright children.

    I am responding to this in part because we've had a very good experience, and while YMMV, I know I really appreciated hearing success stories when dd was little. My dd just turned 12yo, and she is still a voracious and lightening fast reader. She is "globally gifted" but does have some weakness in nonverbal/social areas. She is in 6th grade and has never been skipped. We've been blessed with very flexible public schools that *most* of the time have come through with accommodations. She currently has subject acceleration (3 years) in math and her middle school offers math classes that should meet her needs until high school. Her other core subjects are reasonably demanding in a good way (lots of writing and critical analysis). The science is weak for now but we make up for it in other ways.

    But the main thing is that she is a happy and well adjusted kid. Even though her EXPLORE (out of level achievement test) scores in 4th grade put her at the 99th percentile for 8th graders, she still gets a lot out of school and is very comfortable in her own skin despite being so different. She is well-liked and her social life has blossomed since starting middle school last fall.

    Prepare yourself for a wild ride and enjoy each amazing milestone along the way.

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    One more reference:

    "Reading Instruction for Talented Readers: Case Studies Documenting Few Opportunities for Continuous Progress"

    From the Gifted Child Quarterly (2004): Volume 48 Issue 315

    The "n" is small (12 teachers) and the findings are probably not surprising to any parent who has had to fight for services for a gifted child, but an interesting read nonetheless.

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    What a wonderful, supportive environment! Thanks so much everyone! I've just checked out a few library books on gifted children, parenting and education (covertly, I might add. Sigh.), and am finding them helpful. I will check out the other resources listed above as well. Thank you so much. I suspect I will be back here often!

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    Hello mcswones,

    Welcome! I was in your position a few years ago, and I was so happy to have found this community. It's hard not to talk about your kiddos, and you shouldn't have to feel guilty about doing something as natural as talking about your child's development.

    I also remember the worries about school, because I remembered how unchallenging my school experience was and I didn't want my kiddo to suffer from the same fate. My DH (dear husband) was also concerned, but when we talked of early entrance to school he worried about our kiddo not being as competitive in sports. (DH was very sporty.) We decided to see a psychologist for testing when DS was 4, so if she recommended early entrance we would have time to get that in place. Even though the recommendation in our case was go to kindy with age-mates and then skip 1st, the early testing was helpful because we were able to bring those scores to the gifted coordinator and principal in our school district the spring before kindy started, and they handpicked a teacher who was good at differentiation. (I'm not saying this is good advice for everyone; I'm just sharing our story as to what worked for us early on.)

    I'm not from CA, so I can't give specifics on options, but knowing what you're dealing with before school starts can give you a better idea of what you're looking for in a school setting. What I have found is that the most important features for success for GT kids are flexibility in the school and good teachers. Parents need to be prepared to advocate as partners with the schools. Here's Davidson's Guidebook: Advocacy Guidebook Homeschooling is something you should think about as a back-up plan. (Thanks Grinity for pointing that out somewhere.) - although we haven't traditionally homeschooled yet, it is true that just having the knowledge that we could do this, and it could also be a positive experience, saved us a lot of stress while dealing with the schools. We knew we had a back-up plan, and it made a huge difference in negotiations. If you think you only have one option, you can quickly fall into frustration, even despair, when you come across unreasonable people. Other things to keep in mind, which I believe were mentioned already, are that sometimes you have a fabulous school situation, but it works out well for a year or two. It helps to know that there is a possibility that you could be switching school situations a few times or more in your child's school years. The elementary years are esp. tough because of the focus on the basics, some of which have been mastered by some GT kids prior to starting school. Check out all the options for full-time GT programs near you. It's wonderful for GT kids to learn alongside intellectual peers.

    As for the very early reading, when you're talking about reading before age 3, I say the likelihood of GT is high, and there is a strong chance at highly gifted, especially with a history of GTness in the family. Continue to read with your kiddo and encourage his reading passions. I remember that when my kiddo was 3 or 4, I was so happy because the books I could read to him were so much more interesting than the books that we read over and over when he was 1 or 2; we started reading Narnia books, The Hobbit, the first Harry Potter. There are lists of early reading books for your kiddo on this site too - do a google search and include Davidson Gifted Issues in your search (i've found i've gotten results quicker that way than using the search engine here). Here's one list: Favorite books for early readers

    As for the anxieties, is it possible they're related to perfectionism? My kiddo showed signs VERY early when he would try to do something that didn't turn out how he wanted. Thomas Greespon has some good books on dealing with perfectionism. I have heard him speak and he has some wonderful advice. Here is one of his books:
    Freeing Our Families From Perfectionism

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