Hi! I've wondered if anyone has tried neurofeedback on a highly gifted adult to deal with poor self esteem and generally being stuck in old patterns. Does it work for you? What I'm worried about is the possibly that it doesn't take into account the positive aspects of HEPG ability and as a result I will lose some of my gifted traits when it makes me more "normal".

I have never tried neurofeedback and don't know much about it, but I have spent some time in my life thinking about and consciously going through behavioural changes (and am also finishing a degree in psychology).

I don't believe that any fundamental traits can get irreversibly lost with any kind of therapy or strategy for behavioural change; a lot of your behaviour is also genetically co-determined, so I don't think that there is a real risk of losing basic traits of who you are, or more specifically in your case, your gifted abilities.

Certain specific perceptions, views on the world and behaviours can get lost or change, at least that seems to be a reason why some people don't do psychotherapy. A cliché example would be, being an artist and believing that a lot of creativity stems from "old patterns" as you mention them, or from low self-esteem. So your abilities will never disappear, but maybe you will end up expressing them in another way.

Having made the experience myself, letting go of rather fundamental behavioural patterns and learning new ones can be awkward, unusual, discomfortable at times... but it can also open up possibilities you would never even have dreamt of in the past.

In the end, my opinion is that one needs to make the choice, whether the specific goal, in your case apparently gain in self-esteem, is worth the time and effort, and the potential discomfort of actually letting go of behavioural patterns that one has gotten used to and therefore getting into unknown territory.

Personally, I believe that a good portion of our inner world is changing with time anyway. Modern personality research tends to show that personality is continually changing throughout adult life, for example. The real question is more which direction you wish to steer the ship towards.

Specifically about neurofeedback, you can also think about to which extent you wish to have detailed knowledge about how your EEG readings, or cortical potentials (I don't know which kind of neurofeedback you are thinking about) are changing when you are behaving in that way or another.

Some might find it strange to make the experience of oneself as a biological being whose behaviour is mostly the result of electric currents beneath the skull. Others will find it insightful and interesting.

I haven’t used formal neurofeedback techniques, but I used to have poor self esteem which stemmed from domineering parents, so I thought I’d share my experience addressing this. As background, during childhood and adolescence, I was always acquiescent and even allowed myself to be shepherded into a profession to which I had no inclination, so I passively ended up juggling a busy career and parenthood, feeling that my life was just an endless series of external crises and demands from others.

Then one day, on my usual long daily commute (habitually spent stressing about how late I would arrive at the child care centre to pick up my eldest), I reflected back on my day and had an epiphany - I had accomplished a lot in a much broader range of activities than anyone else and whilst many were well versed in their area of expertise, I was actually a Jill of many trades and my role was integral to the work of a lot of people. I was always quick on the uptake and that’s why a high workload was always directed at me from different directions (a ‘go to’ person by default) and my struggles to keep up with the demands had made me feel inadequate when the reality was that others were, perhaps unconsciously, taking advantage of me. This led me to start a new habit of reflecting, with gratitude at the end of work each day, on my accomplishments, which has given me a better sense of self worth and from this, stronger self esteem.

My husband who has been practising deep meditation for years is interested in neurofeedback and recently bought an EEG headset to monitor his patterns during different activities. He also tried his new toy out on a range of family and friends and the results were interesting. The patterns of members of our immediate family are qualitatively quite different to others who were observed by the same gadget.