Just want to say thanks to all the folks on this website that have kindly offered me homeschooling advice. After a horrible meeting with the school last week, we have finally decided to file a homeschooling notice with the county (giving them their required 15 day notice).

Warning! The following is pure venting:

We wanted our DS6 to stay in school and tried to work with the school to make the principal, teachers, etc. happy. However, it became very clear to us that keeping them happy meant sacrificing our son's happiness.

We went to our meeting with the following ideas: teach the hardest idea first and then go backwards if necessary, present material quickly and then allow longer periods to concentrate on work, and recognize that he can concentrate on many things at once so while it may appear that he is distracted...he is actually engaged.

The principal's response was to say she was taking away his recess until he buckles down and completes his work in the allotted time. This would continue for 8 weeks, or the end of the school year. No special work would be given until he proved he could do the easy work. And, he needed to learn to play the school game to be successful in life.

When we asserted that this would crush any hope that he has left about being happy at school, we were told that wasn't their problem. They were there to teach academics, not worry about the social implications.

We let him go to the school the next day (my volunteer day), and when I saw him, he had just received the news about his new no recess rule. As we suspected, he was devastated. I asked him if he thought that would make him want to do the work, he said no. He was so sad and helpless.

This is a kid who studies immunology for fun and can sketch out the process of mitosis while explaining how DNA is transferred/replicated. And, intuitively started exploring the laws of motion yesterday after considering how a wheel rotates. Needless to say, we (mostly I) couldn't take it anymore and pulled the plug on school.

We are going to see how the next couple of months go and then decide if he goes back next year. Since we have two other children in the school, we will remain connected and that should make any necessary transitions easier for us.

Sorry for the long venting...perhaps there's someone else out there who will benefit.

M6,

Just remeber that the first 8 weeks don't count. You have to give yourself time to get over the "I can't do this" and the "what was I thinking" parts first!

Once you get past that, it's awesome. You get to watch your amazing little person grow right before your eyes and you can stop for a snuggle anytime you want! Nothing better.... Enjoy

I feel your pain and have children in different places with the public school to not attending public school at all, based on the needs of that child. I'm glad to hear that you didn't give in to the pressure and keep him in school. It can be a scary decision to make. It sounds like you have one very smart little guy, and having been there, it would be devistating to allow him to loose that love of learning.

We had a similar response with my DD9 about completing simple assigments before she was allowed higher ones. She gave up and wouldn't even complete the simple ones in the end. I don't understand how a teacher could think that this would motivate a GT kid over time?

Hang in there. Your situation is pretty much exactly what we went through--including missed recesses and taking too long to finish easy work, which (wrongly!) became the thing the teacher focused on. Homeschooling has been hugely successful for us. DS7 is so much happier and healthier (mentally speaking).

I'm sorry the school wouldn't work with you, but I suspect homeschooling will be a success for your son.

Vent away! And if there's anything we can do to help you beyond just listening, please say so. Many of us have been where you are...

melmichigan, I don't understand how the teachers/principals can think this is motivating either. I think their main objective (in our case) is to mold him into being compliant. He has already tested out of the third grade on our state standardized tests, so it is hard to believe that they don't know he is beyond the basic first grade work.

Shari, thanks for the encouragement! I am meeting with a homeschool counselor tomorrow to talk about how I can get some support for the remainder of the school year. I am hoping that having a shoulder to lean on will help me through these first few weeks.

Kriston, thanks for being so nice! I'm already starting to get some unrequested advice from friends.

They are not concerned with his mental health? Then that is no place for him.

HS even under these situations can have an adjustment period. Also, your son may need some time to deschool. THere is even a formula for it....something like a month off for every year in school. I've even read up to 6months off. Other kids need to jump into challenge right away. I would start off by asking him what he wants to learn about and then add in each other thing slowly.

The one argument I had with someone about homeschooling came right after we decided to do it, when I was at my most nervous and insecure.

I wish I had realized it was best to walk away from that unsolicited advice until I was more confident about what we were doing. Now unsolicited advice doesn't bother me at all. I KNOW we're doing the best thing we could under the circumstances for DS7, and I can hear the advice without taking it personally. (Though actually, now that I feel good about homeschooling, my confidence keeps a lot of that advice from even being said. People don't give advice to confident people! Go figure! )

In other words, I think that if you can listen to the advice and let it roll off you if it doesn't help you, then great. If you feel the urge to defend your choice, then learn to change the subject fast and/or walk away. It will save you headaches. Eventually, the comments won't bug you so much.

M6, Do you live in our district? Hehe We pulled our DS6 in Jan and have been unschooling. He has finally started to show some signs of my idea of "school readiness". It took me a while to figure out where he was in his subjects as far as curriculum. It was very scary at first but getting better. Good luck fellow 'homeschool plunger'.

M6, it sounds like your son was in a horrible situation. It's so hard when the school's priority is not the best interest of the kids. I don't homeschool (though I think about it often) but I wanted send along my well-wishes!

Hi Movingup6!

Coming from someone who has battled within the school for proper accomodations and is still working with them(ME!) it sounds like you don't have a lot to work with here.


I'm concerned about this attitude, it sounds awfully *punishing*. There are many ways to assess the child within the brick and mortar school. Many ways to do this without having the child feel that something valuable is being taken away from him.



Honestly, I do believe that this is a sincere concern on the part of the teachers/administrators, they really do believe this.

It's not a huge concern, however, as much of life takes place outside of the microcosm that is the grade school teacher's perspective. I wouldn't try argueing that point with them, though. I'd just disregard the comment.

It really sounds like you have made the right decision. There are some things you can do in the future if you decide that you want to take advantage of the opportunities at a brick and mortar school, I'd give it some time though.

Enjoy the learning journey with your child. There really is nothing better than watching them make those connections and become invigorated with real learning.

Neato

When the PS did this to me as a child just a year older than your DS, I got up and walked out of school to home. The school went nuts looking for me. I am sure your DS can come up with an even more imaginative way to act out. Its best to not let that happen.

The compromise reached was that I got to spend first and last hour in the library and read on my own in the back of class. I had to take tests with the class. (Not all schools were that accomodating.)

Good Luck Moving Up!!
Isn't it a horrible feeling to know your kid is at school all day and not learning. I dk if you feel as I do that it is wasted time. Math has been a waste this year w/my DS6, and I didn't have time to work on it with him. I am going to try harder to fit some time in to actually teach him something!

M6 - your story also sounds like ours...my DS6 is in K this year - we began unschooling him and it was the BEST decision we ever made...it did take a few weeks or a month or so of just allowing him some time to deflate from all the stress of dealing with school life and then we started to see a glimmer of our old child come shining through again after being squashed flat by school! You will do fine and there are SO many resources on the net and possibly near you concerning homeschooling.

How terrible. Good luck with homeschool.

Be careful with homeschooling. I know many,( one was my best friend) that were home schooled and when it came to college they did not have the social skills to survive the college life. I know a lot of schools where I live are willing to working with you and your child to get them the best education possible. If I were you I would also look at Montessori school so that your child can get the social aspect of life too.

Actually, there are a number of studies that have shown that homeschooled kids tend to be very well adjusted. Personally, I have known a number of public-schooled kids who ended up having horrible socialization problems in college (some of whom ended up dropping out). So unless you have something other than anecdotes to support your statement, I will stick with what the research shows. See, e.g., http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1999/03/19/ED71809.DTL

The research I have are kids. The real ones. Ones that were home schooled and have dropped out of college, committed suicide, or have just tried to drop off the face of the plant. Your studies and research you have are not of children from NM, TX, CA or AZ. These are the states I work with on run ways and "lost children" Right now 74 percent of them were home schooled.

In "Homeschooling- A Family's Journey" there are several studies sited that say that homeschooled children are perfectly well adjusted for college. They are so well adjusted that some colleges specifically recruit homeschooled students because they are self-motivated and understand the goal of college isn't to party and make friends. I believe Brown is one that has a homeschool admissions counselor to make the transition easier.

As a teacher, the hardest transitions I have seen though are homeschooled students who are dropped into a public 8th grade for some unknown family reason. These kids have a hard time adjusting to the terrible world of public middle school. It's not their fault that they have expectations of decency, kindness and civility!

I'm lost. You are saying that you are actually a researcher who works with formerly-homeschooled kids? Frankly, I don't buy it. If you were an actual scientist you would need to publish your research, instead of just spouting off random "facts" in an internet forum. Again, anecdotes are not a reliable way to judge the efficacy of homeschooling. I know plenty of kids with plenty of problems who were not homeschooled. I also know several kids who were homeschooled and have no significant issues. (And I don't know any homeschooled kids with significant issues.)

And they're not "my" studies. They are the only studies that I am aware of that deal with homeschooled kids and how strong their social skills are. Again, if you are aware of actual studies that conclude otherwise, I'd love to see them.

I'm in NM. I know several h/s kids and it's just like anything else. Good teachers are the key. Some parents are not committed, some are. Just like the PS!
When you have a child that requires elementary school for some subjects, middle school for others and high school for still another it becomes impossible to keep them in PS. Even the district agrees, it's just not feasible.

Maybe you are speaking of ND kids that you know, but I still don't buy it. Give us cold, hard published facts please, not rhetoric.

Thank you Shari. Don't stereotype a population you don't even know. My own son was on a very bad path in public school and as a parent I took action and am now homeschooling. He honestly gets more positive social interaction now than he ever did at school. I agree, there are bad homeschoolers out there. But I've seen plenty of public school kids fail academically and socially at college. That is not a problem purely related to homeschooling by any means. I don't think that is an issue on this board at all from what I can see.

Good luck! I really wish we could go to homeschooling. Instead I'm filing due process soon.... For many of the same reasons you are going to homeschooling.

How distressing! You mentioned in your other post that you work with gifted kids in high school and middle school. I'm wondering what proportion of those children seemed to be 'well challenged by school and enjoying themselves.'

Please keep in mind that the majority of families who post here, are the facing the most extreme needs. I'm glad that Montessori schools, for example, have worked well in your situation, but keep in mind that the kids here have very individual needs, and although many have enjoyed the Montessori program, many have been through very difficult experiences in that type of program. In fact, what is really needed for the families here, is flexibility. There isn't any 'one size fits all' combination for kids at this level of 'deviation from the norm.'

One thing that I value about this forum is that there is a deep understanding and respect for families who have walked all the various possible paths, trying to figure out what is best for our children. Sadly, most of the folks here don't have the luxury of following 'what works for most kids.' So, even if 74% of missing children in your states were homeschooled, the general situation for homeschoolers in general, and those statistics have very little to do with the reality of our children's lives. ((BTW - in some locations, a child who is having a lot of trouble may be classified as 'homeschooled' once they refuse to go to school, so my hunch is that the homeschooling may be a result of the difficulties, not the cause, but that's neither here nor there. Like so many Gifties - I couldn't resist!))

BTW It's normal for Gifties to want to argue and warn - my DS got in trouble for 'antisocially' yelling at his agemate in kindergarden because the friend was chewing on the computer's cord, and my DS was afraid for him. So if you want to start a seperate topic called 'Dangers of homeschooling' then go ahead and use the General Discussion area (or another Forum all together - Gifties tend to worry about everything, so that may be the kind thing.)

Love and More Love,
Grinity

The paper is being written as you speak. It has been a work in progress for a five year span. You don't have to "buy it". I'm talking college level students. There are many studies out there, most are for doctors and different types of social workers.

You children must attend the Moriarty School district. Most of Moriarty's Gifted students are the one's are I started the study with. Followed one all the way to Yale. ( He was home schooled)He left 2nd year. I'm a mom of "many". I'm didn't tell them not to home school I just said be careful. I am a very big child advocate for children in New Mexico. Trust me Santa Fe runs when they see me. Funny I didn't see many "Gifted" parents fighting the Funding bill(well except for me) that took Gifted out the formula. And yes I won and Gifted is still in the formula. Homeschooling is great. And when my paper is published I will get the "COLD HARD FACTS". I left Moriarty for that reason. It's every parents right to do what ever they want. Me the only war I have is under educated "Gifted" students.

By the way I help parents in New Mexico find the right schools for their children. I have over 350 students this year that I helped place in to different schools or environments to meet their needs. I have 250 more to work with, I am but one person, who is a parent as well.

Me thinks I smell a troll....

Me too, I was just about to post "Please don't feed the Trolls!"

At least people who were concerned about homeschooling and social interaction got to read about the real studies and all the real and useful comments posted from the regulars. It might have been a useful discussion after all

No, I don't think this person is a troll. She is not talking about the same sample represented here, and she's entitled to her opinion - and to respect everyone else's opinion as well. Not worth getting mad about a difference of opinion.

I meant more on the 4 posts, jumping into a conversation with an antagonistic tone, lacking specifics on anything... not the opinion expressed.

Sorry, CAMom, I "know" you better than that. I know what you were referring to. We're lucky to enjoy a civil and supportive tone on this board and let's hope it stays. I think we're all saying the same thing. Hope things are good with you and yours!

I do respect others opinion's. And I have no idea what a troll is, except for a fairy type person that lives in make believe land. Funny how others don't. Difference's is what makes the world go round. Nothing to get mad about.

Hello, new here, I was just wondering do you guys always gang up on someone and their opinion? Sounds like this person my have thoughts of their own on this subject. Homeschooling is not for everyone. Out of eight children, four gifted. Home schooling was not the best suited for us. And as a student it is a lot harder to figure things out when you get older. I have several younger bothers who are gifted who I work with so that they get the best of the best. I know parents always think they know best, but when they get older it might be best to talk to the children. (btw NMMOMTECH, I didn't feel like you were "jumping into a conversation with an antagonistic tone" in your words like others thought here. But I would like to get in touch with you on that study your talking about it. I attend College in TX, ( btw this is my third time trying this, understand a lot of what you said, more then these parents would care to hear) email me if you can, have not figured this thing out yet.
DrewTX

Hey Drew, thanks for showing me this forum. Now I understand where you were coming from. If this other person get's in touch with you, send them the schools way would love to chat.I would say something on home school but would hate to get everyone on my tail on here. Everyone has their opinions for their own reasons. If they only knew yours.

This conversation reminds me of something I read on another board, I think on Julie Bogart's Bravewriter board. It was about a woman showing off her new dress to her DH and his first response is "Oh, well, wouldn't the other necklace or shoes go better with that?" While his comment was well-intentioned, it was not properly timed. We've all had that happen. "Hi mom and dad. This is the man I'm going to marry!" "Well, you gotta watch out for men, like him" ha ha ha. My point is, the OP has made her decision, she was following up to another thread letting us know where she is now in her decision making process. She was not asking for pros/cons of HSing and socialization and college. She is making the best decision she can for her child at this moment. The presence of a troll in another thread undoubtedly made folks a bit jumpy.

This is THE most supportive board I know of for differing opinions. If someone wants to debate the pros/cons of socialization and college wrt to HSing - start another thread. those who want to engage in the conversation will, those who don't will ignore - everyone will be happy.

Most mishaps on forums I've been on are due to misunderstandings in the written word.

NMMOM,

I think the issue here is that the kids discussed here are at the extreme end of the spectrum. There is a big difference between a kid that qualifies for a GT program at school and these kids. Extreme kids require extreme measures. Because your statement was made in "blanket" fashion, it made a lot of hackles stand up. We as parents advocating for these kids get the standard blanket answer all too often by school admins etc.
"Oh we have a wonderful pullout 2 hrs a week which will expose your DD/DS to next years material" When the truth is DD/DS need to be accelerated 3-4 years.

As far as NM goes, I'll be the first to admit that NM isn't known for it's gifted programs. At first glance there aren't any. When we first looked into school I was told by NMATAG that I should move to a differrent state. But the fact is our school has been fabulous, our district super supportive. In spite of this, at some point I will have to homeschool. My DS6 is learning at the rate of 3 grade levels per year. Next year he will need math at the high school level. Sending a 7-8 year old to high school isn't something I'm willing to contemplate.

It's really easy to say what someone else should do with a kid like this, but until you live through it, it's impossible to know what the best choices are. Even as we make our choices, we all second guess ourselves. Maybe your comments weren't meant in an antagonistic way but it certainly came across that way. The parents on this forum are people that care, are looking for answers and support each other. We pay attention to the research and I for one haven't seen anything to support your claims.You are entitled to take a stand against homeschooling for yourself and your children but don't disparage others for choosing differently. No one will ever "attack" you for stating your opinion on this board, only for trying to put your views on us.

Right on, Shari! Nicely (and not "attackingly") put!

I'm practicing Diplomacy!

Well, I think you can relax the practice because you did very well!

Best wishes on your new adventure, Movingup6! I hope you get your happy little guy back, and that you will soon be hearing all about DNA and Newton's laws and whatever else strikes his fancy! Homeschooling has been a great educational option for us--I'm so grateful that we can do this--and I hope it will be for you, too.

I'm sure it feels a lot better even to have made the decision--and now the fun starts! Enjoy your time together.

peace
minnie

My thoughts exactly.

I hope homeschooling will work for their child. As a child and Gifted, I am the other end of the spectrum. After high school I used some college money and played the stock market in less then a year I had a million. This money is helping my brothers now. I was sometimes called "rain man" and for that reason my mom pulled me. (Wrong reason) I have found TX schools to have great Gifted programs. And by the way Los Almos and Rio Rancho are on the high end of New Mexico seating chart for Gifted Programs. I just wish PARENTS know how much power they had in their hands to "Change" the school districts way of thinking and work outside the box. I was looking for some great support on here, but what I have seen has been an attack on one's person. Not very nice, even if it looks like you tried later to be nice. This is the reason why others do not help "our" cause. For high, intriguing and well educated education for "Gifted" children.
Very Disappointed
Drew

Sorry about the disappointment Drew. You reap what you sow and so on and so forth. ((shrugging shoulders))

Hope you stick around and find something worthwhile.


Neato

If anyone has any doubts about Movingup6's motivation for homeschooling, or how hard she worked with the school to get what her child needs in a public school setting, or how much thought she has apparently put into this decision, then go back and read the first post in this thread. Her child is at risk if left in the public schools, and she doesn't have time to change things for the next child or generation -- her child is suffering NOW!

Good luck Movingup6!

OH Drew, I understand your sadness. From all that I read, I feel that the NMTECH mom was just trying to warn. (remember food taste different to everyone.) I know, what home schooling did for you and why you sponsor programs you do( work with Drew on change in Pubic Schools) Drew don't give up an all parents yet. You know with all the work that you have done to help your brothers and yourself, that not everyone is right and must have their own down falls in life to learn life lessons. Keep up your fight so that our tax money does not get wasted in the public school system. There are many of us that believe in you. I do think this place is a good support, if everyone is open minded.
P.S. Emailed that other person for you, hoping for a respond. Could be your biggest Advocate yet.

Indeed!

Our priority is not "tax money;" it's our own children. We are all very supportive of whatever solutions work for each family. Homeschooling is not for everyone, and that's fine. Every family, every child, every school option is different. We're not homeschool pushers here, just people trying to find workable solutions for our children. Second-guessing the solutions that others are trying--whatever those solutions may be--is pretty much never appreciated here. We're all about the support!

I'm sorry you think your parents made a mistake with homeschooling, Drew. I hope you do well in your life in spite of their error. You seem like a pretty resiliant person, so I have high hopes!

I have posted in the past of my experience with my now teen son and I had wished homeschooling would have been an option for me. Since I am the sole provider for my son, this was not a possibility. I cannot tell you what grief a parent and the child feels when a school district cannot open it's eyes and things get mixed up in politics high achievers and truely gifted and of small minds who have no idea how to entice a gifted and or gifted/adhd child to thrive.

Having a child left to their own devices because he/she will not follow the norm is very neglectful IMO.

I was a bit hesitant to respond to this post because there are many people who cannot understand that giftedness has it's own mixed set of blessings as successful people sometimes find themselves feeling quite alone.

Dear Just a mom,
I understand your level of frustration. Not everyone has that option, and like in my case that was not the best option. My mom thought that it would be and it hurt me more then helped me.
So in my case I help fight the "BIG WIGS" on what a Gifted Child needs. A REAL EDUCATION. I have made a lot of progress. But as you see in earlier post a lot of parents of "Gifted" get upset about the wrong stuff. I just made contact with the other person on this forum, ( the one they bit her head off)(flew to meet her and your committee even) and WOW. This mom goes out of her way to help hundreds of parents "FREE OF CHARGE" to find the right place for their child. Some times that did mean "homeschooling" but they were in combined settings with other parents.
I don't mean to offend people on here, but Home schooling is not always the best option. And like you, for some that could not be the option, unless they want to live on welfare or make a lot of money early in life like I did. If you tell me what state you live in I could send you many contacts on who could be right for your child in education. Also I'm here in New Mexico meeting with that mom, and finding out a lot more information.
P>S> Thanks 2more2go for sticking up for me and that mom. You know I don't like being around mean.

You seem to be pretty upset about that choice your mom made, Drew. Can you offer some specifics? Why was it a problem? What went so wrong?

What kind of homeschooling did your family practice? What sort of curriculum did you use?

Maybe you can help others to avoid making the same mistakes your family made by telling us more specifics about your experience.

Sorry it took me so long to respond but I was working with the women from NM on funding a project to help gifted children in New Mexico. For all the knifes that were thrown on here to her, I wonder why a women like that would keep defending parents on here like she does.
Ok on homeschooling a gifted child at home. In my case unless you were highly educated, home school is a waste of energy on both party's. ( yes my mother had a masters and I was out thinking her at 8) ( I doubt most parents on here have PHD in Gifted Education.) They called me "rain man" for a reason. I work well with numbers and that is how I made my wealth, but now I am working on continuing my education. I have tested out of the first three years of college.( And not by the help of homeschooling) I don't know if most parents know but if you keep reteaching the same information to a gifted "highly" child you will have them start to erase what you are teaching. Our brains do not work with a lot of repetitive information.
Difference with me, reading 2nd grade level at 3 years of age.
Knew my times tables by 3.5 years of age.
Was taught Algebra by my kindergarten teacher. I would have continued with this high level of education, but my mother thought home school was best. WRONG.
I think children should be involved with the process if that is what the parents decide. But that is why I feel so strongly against home schooling.
By the way I met with some of those students that "MS" had talked about. We were all on the same agreement about what our issues where with homeschooling. And everyone of our IQ's were OUT THE DOOR.
Drew

A kindergarten teacher doing algebra with a student!? Wow! Clone her! That's fantastic!

You know, one of the reasons many of us are homeschooling is so that our children don't have to repeat material they already know, as was happening to them when they were in traditional schools. So that's covered.

But for those of who aren't fortunate enough to have a K teacher leading algebra lessons, what else went wrong with homeschooling for you?

Drew - I'd love to hear your response to Kriston's inquiry. If you are comfortable sharing more details - I'd also like to know how old you were when you began & finished home schooling? How much time did you spend in the ps school system? Can you tell us more about what your daily routine was as a child being hs?
I am considering hs but right now we are planning on private Friends school next year at a very hefty price tag on top of our taxes - which in NJ are out of control But as another parent on this thread said - it's not about taxes it's about our kids. We did the Montessori thing for preschool and that was a terrible experience. My son, who was 3-4 at the time, was self-initiating learning at home about black holes, super novas & topics way beyond his age - was bored to tears literally at the Montessori. PS has been a struggle, and all though I first took the approach that the system needs to change (and it does big time) I soon realized that my son was suffering now and that those changes would not come soon enough for him. He's asking to go to another school or be homeschooled so he can finally learn something he doesn't already know.
That said, I would love to find out more info on groups that are organizing to fight for change in our ps system. It's long overdue. Was it not in the 70's when the Marland report came out and called for changes to gifted education that still have not been fully accepted or enacted? Government moves very slowly. Who can fault the parent that acts in the best interest of their child? I'm certain many parents would love to organize & advocate for changes to gifted public education. Drew - maybe you could start a thread on this matter - you may find many allies here.

Drew I had the same exact experience as you, except replace "Public School" with "Homeschool". I can really relate to your feelings on the issues and I feel as if I missed out by not having the opportunity to learn at home, at my own pace and level. Trust me, I felt very *abused* by the public school system. It was just as tragic for me as homeschooling seemed to be for you.

I guess we should think long and hard about how very different these children are, even though they have extremely high cognitive abilities in common........something to think about.....


Neato

I had the same experience with my elementary school years. I was at a small private school that didn't acknowledge GT needs. I felt like a fish out of water for 9 years.

I'm sorry Drew had a bad homeschooling experience. If you had a kindergarten teacher at a public school working with you on Algebra, that is amazing! My child would still be at public school if that were our experience. If you asked my 8 year old if he wanted to return to traditional school you would get a resounding no. I literally think it would be damaging to him to throw him back in right now. Every child and situation is different.

If we had a teacher able to teach Algebra to a K student my children would be in public school right now. I spent four long years fighting our school district. I am only making marginal progress. It has taken that long for them to even aknowledge that they cannot meet my DD9's needs. And they did admit it since we are not in a state with any GT laws. My DD9 attends for a partial day, homeschools all but ELA. My younger children homeschool exclusively right now.

I attended the same district when we moved in for my high school years. I went from a expensive GT private school in Ohio (gifted laws) to public school in Michigan (no gifted laws). What a complete waste of four years. I do not wish to see the same thing for my children. I would love to be able to change things so that gifted children in this district get what they need, and definately beginning in elementary years. Many have fought in previous years, few of us have gotten anywhere. I cannot continue to wait for them to figure it out at my children's expense. My DD9 finally asked to be homeschooled last summer. For now a partial day is working. Still hoping to work something out for her to attend some higher classes in the future but not holding my breath in the mean time.

Sent you a PM, melmichigan!

Yes! Which is why I'm HSing. These kids are so very different. What works for some here won't work for others. We have kids in schools working 3 grade levels ahead in their age-grade, others that have been grade-skipped many grade levels, some which spend some time 4 grades up for math, 3 grades up for science, 2 grades up for LA ... and those that are HSed. All of these are the right or best choices at the time for some kid somewhere. We can't say that PS is the only way, or grade skips are the only way, or HSing is the only way....no such animal.....it's a case by case basis.

Unfortunately, the internet as many things, is self-selecting. You'll happen upon a board where grade skips are horrible. Everyone has a horrible story to post about being grade-skipped or about having a child grade-skipped. Then you'll find a page where grade-skipping is the answer to all prayers.

I think for most here, our kids were BEGGING (and for some of us, dying before our eyes) to HS. Today there are SOOOOO many avenues out there for advanced kids w/ distance learning courses, early college, that their needs can be met.

I'm sorry Drew that you had such a rough time of it. Depending on the nature of your PS, there is no guarantee you would have fared any better or worse in PS. All we can do is make a decision based on current knowledge and reassess on a regularly basis on whether what we're trying is working.

Schools today are very different w/ NCLB, increased class sizes....there is much less time for teaching a Ker Algebra. I wish more teachers were so open.

Some good news to report since we made the decision to homeschool...

DS6 made the decision to go back to his own Sunday School class at church on Sunday and had a blast. The teacher pulled me aside afterwards and told me she didn't know what had happened to DS6, but he was a different child. She said he was relaxed and happy to participate in all the activities that he previously found "boring" or below his level. I think she was more happy than he was because she had been feeling like a failure with him!

He has also been much more compliant with his normal home chores. That may seem like a small victory, but it has been huge for me. I had gotten to the point where I didn't even want to bug him about his chores, because it was like starting a war. Now, he is doing them without complaining. This morning, he even proudly showed me how hard he worked on his bed.

I have to admit that I do feel a little lost, but I am going to meet with a local cirriculum planner to help me get organized. In the meantime, we are exploring whatever comes to mind and seems fun.

DS6 is enjoying this new approach, but when I try to introduce something challenging (writing), he is very resistant and has a lot of negativity. I am hoping (and praying!) that this negativity will pass with more time at home.

Congratulations! I noticed a similar attitude shift with my son when we pulled him out of school. He gets so much more out of these additional activities now too.

My DS8 isn't a big fan of writing either, but we consistently journal every day, if only for a few minutes. I typically try to pick writing topics he's interested in - the books he's reading, how to play a video game, write a story about a crazed alien taking over our city and then underline all the nouns, etc etc. Typing can help too. Be creative and consistent when you start. But you may want to continue to give him a break until he seems ready.

Movingup6 - I was soo hoping you'd drop by with an update! And what a great one it is!!!! I have 2 friends who saw similar turn arounds in their kids after removing them from school.

I think they get resentful about lack of challenge that it permeates other aspects of their lives, such as your child's Sunday school. Now that he is happy, his mind is open to these activities.

You have a a local curriculum planner? WOW! I would definitely seek his input about things he wants to learn and take it slow. Advice I read and followed, was I added one new thing every few weeks after the previous thing was routine.

As far as writing, I would have him narrate to you - stories he's made up, narrate about books he's reading, about movies you're watching. When you get a moment, check out www.bravewriter.com about the importance of copywork and dictation and freewriting in helping people break through that writing phobia.

Hey, Movingup6, that's great news! I'm so pleased for you and your little guy. Congratulations!

Narration has been a good tool here, too.

peace
minnie

M6,

I'm glad you came back for an update! It sounds like things are going well. Have you had any resentment from the others?

To deal with weaker areas effectively, a leading GT expert recommended that our family a) make sure DS7 does something that he LOVES every day, and b) spend 3x more time on his strengths than we spend on the weaker areas.

Both these approaches help keep the focus on loving learning without neglecting the weakness(es). Since the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, and many of us have our own perfectionism issues to wrestle with ( ), I think it becomes easy to look at what they need help with and forget that NO ONE likes to spend a lot of time on stuff they're not good at!

Just a thought...

P.S. Glad to hear that things are already improving! Yay!

Thank you all for your support and helpful suggestions. I will definately check out the bravewriter site. Even the title sounds encouraging! And, I like the idea of dictation as a breakthrough method.

Shari, generally the other children are supportive of our decision to homeschool DS6 (thanks for asking!). The 21 yr old thinks it's kind of crazy (I think in a cool way), the 12 and 14 yr olds are just glad it isn't them (they love their friends at school), and our other 6 yr old hasn't really thought about it much. The only issue has been with our 8 yr old daughter. She has made a few comments that indicate some jealousy. This is pretty typical for her. I think she's in the right place (at school) for now, because she needs the special support she gets there and she needs social skills in some ways more than book knowledge. But who knows...maybe if this works out, I'll bring her home too. Never say never!

I wouldn't in my wildest dreams ever have though that I would be homeschooling my children. Definately never say never!