DS7 in 1st grade is in a public charter school. He just got tested WISC IV with a GAI of 146. We are going to do an achievement test in April. His current school may or may not work out for next year so we are looking around.

DS has about 6/7 grade reading level, math at least around 3rd grade. The public school in our area is supposed to be very good with high API. This can be our option, but we probably need to advocate for his education. This public school does not do subject acceleration, but they have ability grouping within the same classroom. The also have a gifted coordinator who oversees the GATE program (which doesn't start until 3rd grade) and provide materials for differentiation.

How is your experience dealing with public school for HG kids?

My kids are in public school. I have been pleased with my oldest dd's education this far. She has had some awesome teacher's that have encouraged and empowered her. She is extrememly bright (she is in the gifted program) but prefers social and art activities to academics.

My 7 year old ds on the other hand, enjoys the academic pursuits first then everything else is like icing on a cake for him. The principal had been very open to meeting his academic needs but the teacher is extremely resistant. I have advocated for him but I am embarrased to admit I got lost and hesitant when I have needed to take a stand. I was looking at the big picture instead of what his needs are at this very moment.

I have always advocated for my kids in the school. But with dd it was much more one on one with the teacher's. They were open to her needs and in her instance a grade skip would have been devastating to her. When I advocate for ds it is on a much broader scale because I have to talk with the principal, gate coordinator, his current teacher, future teacher etc. I am a more effective advocate one on one than when I need to coordinate with a large group.

I am hearing the same w/public schools by me, they don't do subject acceleration. So then what is a kid who can read the NY Times going to do in a Kindergaten class reading Cat in the Hat etc...

Do you have a good relationship with the principal? If so, I would do most of my advocating through that office. After all, this school year is almost over and next year is a new teacher. Maybe you could speak to the principal about the possibility of having input into next years teacher?

My son's principal actually gave me a list of the various grade teachers available to my son for next year. I've been doing classroom observations to determine which ones would be the best fit. Also, take the time to ask the teachers how they feel about having DS in their class. Some teachers love it, some not so much.

BWBShari, That is great advice.
We might be in public 1st in Sept.
Right now my DS is in Montessori.
I never thought to ask the teachers how they would feel about having DS in their class.
Although I might not have a choice since he would be in a gifted program and I believe they place your child, there might only be one gifted class even. We will find out in April.
Once I find out I will make an apt to speak to the principal.

In reading tons of material regarding grade skipping there is one theme that is continious... The receiving teacher needs to be on board and in favor of having your child. Seems to me even if you're not talking about a skip, the teacher is the most important element in your child's day.

Thanks for all your input!

I spoke to the principal in the public school because I was trying to talk to a 2nd grade teacher to see how they differentiate. He said because of the budget cut, he has no idea who is going to stay and who is going to leave. It sounds horrible!

Yep I would agree 100%.
Last year his montessori teacher was amazing, she was a perfect fit. If she was the elementary teacher would would stay for sure. So yep no matter what the teacher is the most important factor.

Didn't even think how the budget cuts will affect us all.
Something else to worry about.

We have had good luck with our school, ds just moved to a new one, I have only briefly met the principle. She is very nice. They have sort of distanced themselves from the families, at least that is the feeling I have and heard among other parents. But other than that things are good, ds8's teacher is great. Without announcing it as a plan, they have clustered the gt kids in a couple of classrooms, not to overwhelm one teacher with all of them, but not to keep them completely separate during the day. It really helps. And the same group in class A gets called at the same time to do the pull out so it's not just one lone kids wandering down the hall. At this age, that does help a lot, I think.
The teacher is a young, dynamic person who seems gifted herself, but I am not entirely sure. She just gets stuff really quickly, and gets ds without hesitation, she 'sees' his good side. I might just cry here.

I guess ds is one of the moderately gifted kids who just blossoms in these pullouts, because that is what is happening for him. It is just so nice to watch it unfold.

That is wonderful. My dd has had a very similar experience. She thrives with the extras that the school has provided along with her after school activites. I think that is why I have found my ds's situation so discouraging. I wanted him to have the same sort of experience, not realizing he may need a different solution.

I'm glad a number of people had good luck with public schools.

Unfortunately, we did not have such good luck with DS7 and public school. Given my personality and my HG+ DS7's, we chose to homeschool him instead of fight with a "We're a good school! How dare you suggest your child needs more?!" school system. It has been a good choice in his specific case, FWIW.

OTOH, DS4 will start public K next year. This is partly because he is a very different child than DS7 in terms of personality and learning needs, partly because all the K teachers are good and K is not a highly academic year, and partly because I want to request that the school test him so I don't have to pay for it.

1st grade is when we will decide what to do with DS4 for the long(ish) term. If public school will work well for him, that's where he'll go. If not, we'll homeschool or try private school.

DH and I are all about serving the individual child's needs to the best of our ability, whatever that may mean. No decision is final for us. I think that's true for many people on this forum.

YMMV...

This year, after much advocating, we are having a good second half of the year. My DD9 attends public school for ELA, music, spanish, and speech and language therapy. This gives her almost a half day in public school. She homeschools all math, science, history, art, gym. It seems to be working for her. Sadly it took four long years to get here and I feel bad for the time and opportunity that she lost while stuck in a bad situation. Those were my denial years I'm afraid. I didn't realize how much we were holding her back.

My DD6's homeschool exclusively.

My DD3 goes to an early childhood program through our school district and then learns at home. I say learns because we are just following his lead at this time.

We have the same approach, everything is subject to change, it depends on that particular childs needs at a given time.

I hear you. I definitely have some moments of kicking myself, too. I think it's normal to feel that way.

But forgive yourself. You did the best you could at the time, given what you knew. You learned, you adapted, and things are better now.

After all, bruises on your backside from all the kicking don't help your kids.

I agree with Kriston.

We all do the best we can on every given day. It's impossible to know if the choices you make today will do any good tomorrow.

Flexibility is king! For the school AND for the parents. Many great things CAN be done, but that doesn't always mean they are.

We have recently had great success for our kids through flexibility at school. It took a long time to get here, a whole lot of patience, a sprinkling of forgiving and a couple of fake smiles.

In the thick of things with DS6 school. They won't accept private testing (highly reknowned doctor ID son as gifted & needing academic accomodations) & insist we wait till the end of next year for their group ability testing. So basically my son will have been subjected to at least 3 years of remedial education - really, isn't that what it is?
Teacher is passive-aggressive & now is skipping spelling all together rather than differentiate - in her words she's sure he knows it all. . Sent home a print out from a science website that I had a hard time reading - because my son complained he was not learning science. The purpose - for my fluent reader to underline long vowel sounds??? What???
I'm planning to homeschool.

You crack me up, neato. Was it really only a couple?

That is exactly what it is "remedial education".
It it really aggravating.
Why should a child have to waste time learning what they learned years ago, what a waste!
Good luck if you do homeschool.

Wow, doesn't sound like a good experience at all. I am curious, is the principal saying that they won't accept private testing? Also, even if they won't accept the testing you are able to schedule a meeting with support staff (psychologist, social worker, principal, teacher, etc.) to discuss your child and what is or is not working in the classroom. That is your right, and they can't deny that. We call the Child Study Team meetings (CST's) every place/state is different. I would talk to them there about your concerns. I would also be persistent about scheduling one and asking when the date is instead of waiting for them to get back with you and schedule something. I don't know if the psychologist you used could help advocate for you (attend a meeting or suggest someone that could) to help support you...but that would be helpful. Also they seem completely uneducated about gifted children and may need some gentle help with learning. Or you could always try homeschooling, but I personally would be more apt to try it if the school still wasn't working with me by the end of the school year and if they hadn't made any changes yet.

Hi,
Yes, the principal specifically said that they won't accept private testing. Tried meeting with support staff, CST is only available to kids with medical diagnosis. Plus support staff are all siding with the teacher.
Recently, after much pursuit they did agree to have the gifted teacher look at him and make some recommendations to his classroom teacher. The teacher hasn't bought into any of this and doesn't feel he's entitled to anything different than any of the other kids. She's offended that he wants to learn more than she's offering. She actually stated she was offended because he said he wanted to go to a private school where he would be with more kids like him who want to learn (now this is the perception of a then 6yr old - not saying that his thinking is right but his 50 year old teacher is holding this against him).
The folks we are dealing with THINK they are highly knowledgable about gifted education, but clearly they are clueless. To quote the brilliant principal "gifted kids who are bored always finish their seatwork before the other kids and then they just sit still and look bored". Whatever...
What's really scary now is that even though they have a report stating my son is gifted and does not have a disorder, they are suggesting that he's not gifted (but he's been tested twice at age 4 & 6 and the second time his IQ score jumped higher by a significant amount) and that he has a disorder that we are failing to treat!!!! I've heard of schools reporting parents to child services for not medicating them! I'm starting to think with the little hints they are dropping that they are trying to scare us off by suggesting that we are negligent.
I'm hoping to make it to June and then we are done with our public school system. I wish I had the money to sue them. Not for damages but to change the law. My child has no rights to an appropriate education in NJ! I know there's a 2005 mandate but it's not funded or enforced. And the mandate does not support the parent's right to private assessment. Basically the school can use whatever method it wants to determine a child's ability as long as it uses more than one measure.
I may move to Pennsylvannia. I hear they have IEPs for gifted kids which would at least give us a bit more legal footing.
Thanks for the suggestions.

Oh FrustratedNJMom - ICK ICK ICK. I don't even know what to say to your post but just to offer huge hugs.


oh my - well that might be true for most gifted kids, but certainly not mine.

Thanks Dazed&Confuzed. I sure need a hug. :-)

FrustratedMom,

Before you look into changing states, you might just need to speak to a few other districts in your state. The PS that my DS6 is in is not mandated to do anything for him, yet they have gone out of their way to get him what he needs. The secret is to find a principal who understands PG kids. Look around, make phone calls, you might get lucky.

Wish we were having the same luck. Principal seems to have completely ignored our request to carefully consider which K teacher to give DS6 last August. Don't think he took it the least bit serioulsy - even though I had a county counsellor with me too. Have planned to asked about next year next week - because I figure hey will have some totally lame excuse about not knowing who's staying and which teacher's are getting cut here too .With all the cuts - all the mroe reason to homeschool -but while they still try to help DS6 this year, I give them a chance and don't outright mention it. No point burning bridges. Just wish were in a better neighborhood - and yet this school pulls from neighborhoods better than this one - it just pulls from a few that a slightly worse too. No clusters....no teachers ...no money soon I expect ...just sucks.