My 8yo was identified with a GAI of 135 earlier this year with low coding scores. We are in a small village with only one school, which doesn't have a gifted program so I was concerned about how to best serve her needs. When we initially met with the school they would only focus on the negatives, like her organizational skills and social skills, but said that once we had worked those out we could look at what else she needs.

We did a lot of work with her and towards the end of the school year it was clear that she was doing much better. I asked for a follow up meeting to discuss what we were going to do for the next school year and finally got one on the last day of school, only to have them tell me she is doing better and has been placed with some of her friends for 3rd grade.

I'm frustrated because while I need to get them to do more, I don't want to rock the boat - we can't move to another school, and we can't homeschool so this is our only option. But I can't seem to get them to understand that they aren't doing enough for her.

I had considered asking for a grade skip, since she has already done a lot of 3rd grade work, but I'm not sure how to approach it. I thought about maybe waiting to see how she does then ask for it mid-year. How can I ask for more without burning any bridges?

A grade skip is a reasonable request although they may not see it as such. If you can, I'd get a copy of an Iowa Acceleration Scale and fill it in as best as you can with supporting documentation attached and either submit a letter with a formal request for a skip with the documentation and IAS attached or set up a meeting to discuss with it in hand.

Another option would be to request subject acceleration in her strongest subjects if all of the grades have reading or math at the same time for instance. Subject acceleration can be a good segue into a grade skip in later years as well.

You may have to realize that you cannot advocate for more without getting some people irritated. It is easier for the school to provide the same to everyone than it is to do something special for your child. However, there is a difference btwn advocating assertively and being accusatory or aggressive and it sounds like they aren't planning to do anything for her to accommodate her different needs at this point, which just isn't good enough.

Do you know the 3rd grade teacher she has? Would s/he be a good ally or someone who is likely to stand in your way?

You may be caught in a very tough situation. One thing I'd want to have an idea of - do you think that the situation is just that the school staff doesn't want to provide differentiation/accelerated work for your dd... or is what you're running into more "global" - i.e. - the school staff doesn't want to do anything different for any student (not just for high ability kids)? If the case is the latter, you may be running head on into a brick wall that isn't going to budge. If it's not the latter, there may be some things you can do, but it may take awhile.

I'd also recommend getting a copy of the Iowa Acceleration Scales, as well as gathering up all the evidence you have of your dd's abilities - report cards, exceptional classroom work, work she's done outside of school, any and all testing she's had. You might want to consider having her take a talent search test this year if she hasn't participated in one previously.

The next thing I'd do is think through the low coding issue - is it impacting her at all in her ability to show her knowledge at school? Does she have any accommodations? If she doesn't have any accommodations in place, I'd really think that through and advocate for those accommodations this year. My ds has a low coding score relative to his other subtests and it absolutely impacts his ability to show the full breadth of his knowledge in school and in testing without accommodations in place. Did you have any input re why the coding score is low? If not, having a small amount of follow-up testing or input from a neuropsychologist might really help - there can be different reasons for a low coding score, and some of them (visual processing for instance) can be remediated.

You may not get anything from the school at this point in time. If you don't, and if your dd is ok with it, I'd forge ahead with subject acceleration at home looking to where she'll land in middle school. We had a tough time advocating for acceleration for our ds at his original elementary school due to his lack of organizational skills and low processing speed *and* due to the school staff simply not being willing to consider it. We had ds work independently in math at home using a program where we could track his progress relative to state standards, and when he went into middle school he was able to subject accelerate easily when we showed the school the work he'd done at home plus his state testing results.

Last thing I'll add - your post really resonates with me because we so often heard about how disorganized our ds was in elementary school (and he was, and continues to be organizationally challenged). He also had a tough time fitting in socially. Getting him an appropriate challenge at school made a *huge* difference in his social world, and his organizational skills did improve somewhat simply with age - how many 8 year olds do you know who are truly well organized? Throw in a bit of a challenge with processing speed and/or organizational skills etc combined with a child who isn't happy in school because they are bored and the organizational challenges are just going to be more challenging!

Good luck to you as you advocate for your dd -

polarbear

ps - one other thing I'd add - how unusual do you think your dd's ability is at her school? Is she completely exceptional or are there a lot of other bright kids? If there are a few other peers (ability) another approach to consider is offering to volunteer to work with a small group of high achieving / high ability students yourself on a regular basis in one subject area such as math or writing etc. We have had parents do that with some minor success at my children's elementary school. In our school it worked best starting at the classroom level with a willing teacher rather than having a parent approach the principal first.

I did this with my dd13 when she was in 4th grade and would have some feedback if you wind up going this route. First, like polarbear mentions, make sure that she won't be way beyond the highest group. We found that it was less successful when our child needed more than most or all of the other kids in her class. Secondly, make sure that the material they are giving you to work on with the kids is related to the curriculum she'd be learning at school but more advanced such that it leads to higher achievement test scores which tends to be what she'll need to show consistently in order to be offered more acceleration later. My dd's pull out math, while fun, consisted of me doing things like suduko puzzles with the kids which created very little, if any, gains in math achievement scores and made it less likely that she was going to be offered acceleration the following year b/c she had learned very little that year in math and her achievement scores had, accordingly, pretty much stagnated.

I found a copy of the IAS online and I'm pretty sure she'd score in one of the top 2 tiers. Hopefully I can meet with the principal before school starts. I know they have done it at least once before, because my daughter is friends with an older kid who skipped 3rd. Most of her friends are in older grades actually (another plus in my favor hopefully!).

I know of at least a few kids in her grade who are given the same math and reading level work as her, I don't know if any of them have been for testing. They do have an 'enrichment' program, but it's basically keeping the upper half of the class entertained while they work with those who need a little more time. I've seen the gifted programs that are in place in other nearby, larger school districts and this pales in comparison.

In terms of accommodating the coding, she hasn't needed any. She got 96-98th percentile scores on MAP testing, so they don't think she needs help. The psychologist we worked with didn't have an answer for the cause, and our insurance denied coverage for the therapy they recommended.

At this point we are working on additional math and reading at home, and she does a lot of the online programs that they allow her to do in the classroom when she's done with her work at home too - Renzulli learning is the main one, and Brainpop. But she's there 7 hours a day, I want her to be happy and to be learning. I don't think waiting for middle school will make a difference because it will only be more of the same there. It's an even smaller school, with even less funding. The only other alternative is waiting for 4th grade, where we have the opportunity to have her in a 4th/5th grade mixed class, with the hope that they'll let her 'skip' then and go to middle school a year early.

I actually had considered asking for a grade skip in kindergarten because she was so bored but her teacher said it wasn't a good idea because she was so emotionally immature. I wish I'd have known more back then because I think being with older kids would have been exactly what she needed to come out of her shell. But they say hindsight is 20/20...