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Posted By: Ellipses Young Love - 01/28/14 04:57 PM
My daughter, who is one year younger than her peers, has always had social problems. I have posted here about her being an introvert and just very behind socially. I have often worried about her being so alone.

Well as of a few weeks ago, she has a boyfriend. And he is gifted also. They text all the time and have gone out on dates.

I fear her grades will suffer, but so far they haven't. She is a junior taking mostly college courses with tons of writing in them.

I'd like to hear from others about social concerns.

Posted By: bluemagic Re: Young Love - 01/28/14 05:30 PM
That is wonderful news, I hope it goes well. I really don't expect my DS to have a girlfriend before college. My older daughter who is a lot more social, never managed a boyfriend in H.S.

My DS14 (freshman in H.S.) is also an introvert. When he was a kid he has a few friends, but he hasn't really had any peers as friends since his bf moved to the east coast after 5th grade. He had huge social problems in 6th grade, that have gotten better but he did alienate a few kids that year. I sent him to group therapy for a while at the end of 6th grade. And we do have some slightly older family friends whom he gets along with. He never sees other kids his age out of school activities. But I am always surprised how friendly the other kids are with him the few occasions I do see him at school activities. I was very worried in jr. high he was beign bullied as I was bullied at that age, and I desperately wanted friends. But from what I can tell he just wanted to be alone.

I got a lot of push from the councilor at his junior high, that I needed to find more social groups for my son. But after doing some introspect & talking with him I decided not to push. I came to the realization that as an introvert, being forced to spend 6 hours a day around people was enough and I should just let him have some alone time after school. The two things that have helped him the most are marching band at school, and the wilderness summer camp he has attended the past 3 years.
Posted By: Ellipses Re: Young Love - 01/28/14 05:58 PM
I expect my daughter to be in a few clubs for college purposes, but I know that she needs her alone time. I didn't expect her to have a boyfriend at this age either. She surprised me.

I am an extrovert and try not to share my experiences too much. They seem to invalidate her. Thanks for replying.
Posted By: Ellipses Re: Young Love - 01/28/14 09:07 PM
Thanks MoN. So far, she's been true to herself and gotten her work done. But thanks for the idea!
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