So this is the reaction I got the other day when I asked the director of this nice preschool dd goes to about specifics on trying her out in K next fall.
I think she said 3 or 4 times how young dd is. Right, yup, she's young. Almost 4 now. Will be about 4.5 in the fall. A whole 7 months early for K. This does not seem like an outrageous leap ahead to me. Dd is possibly HG, for sure MG.
Anyway, since that was the directors only argument, I figured I'd press ahead and ask if they could at least give her a couple weeks in the class as a trial, depending on what her current teachers say about her later in the spring. She said she'd look into, so that was all I wanted for now.
I was feeling pretty good about dd that day, so avoided being sidetracked. I'd just gotten back from a dr's appt with her where not 1 but 2 people asked if she was about 5, commenting on both her size and her speech. Later that day when I picked her up the teachers were just so excited to tell me she was helping everyone collect their things at the end of the day, giving hugs out and making sure they didn't forget anything.

I really do want to play the whole thing by ear, see if dd even likes it, but I do think she's moving along nicely towards a lot of k readiness, will be able to handle the work and most of all I think she'll enjoy it.

I guess I will update this thread with thoughts as this process goes along...any btdt thoughts from other folks would be appreciated.

Good luck!! Keep us informed.

This reminds me of my son's best friend in his daycare room when he was 3. He said that he hates how long he has to wait after naptime when the teachers have to tie the shoes on all the children before they could go outside. He is happy that he doesn't have to wait as long now, since his friend, N, is allowed to go around as part of the tie-up team. This little 3 year old girl not only could tie her own shoes, but she could tie everyone else's too.

Her mom told me later that N would insist on her Mom packing a extra snack for my son every night. No wonder she was my son's Best Friend!

I'd suggest that you keep smiling, and try to get a written agreement regarding how long the trial will be, and what the criteria will be for continuing or not.

If the school doesn't come up with a doc, you can. You can take notes at the next meeting, write them, up, and say, "Thank you for the meeting. I'm so pleased that you share my concern about finding the best placement for dc's social, emotional, and academic well being. My understanding is that we will have a six week trial..."

good luck!

chris1234 - I just want to say good for you and DC. It's so great you are aware of this at such a young age. I did not truely understand our stiutation until 2nd grade and it was like getting hit with a brick. You can certainly avoid lots of damage by starting early. I wish you continued success. keep us posted.

I love this little story. thanks for sharing.

My DD started K at 4. She was more than ready but sadly the teacher wasn't ready for her, it was her first year teaching K. It was the first of many challenges with the school district. I have absolutely no regrets with her starting earlier and think it was definatley the right choice for this child. If I went with hindsight, she should have had a skip somwhere around 2nd or 3rd grade to prevent some of the problems we had in 4th and 5th. Now it's moot since she homeschools at levels beyond another skip.

Go with your gut, and definately get as much as you can in writing, especially if it is a private school you are paying for.

I don't get this obsession with people being five. I have a girl in my kindergarten class who turned five last month and a new one coming who won't hit her fifth birthday until after school's out for the summer. They're both completely ready to be where they are and I'm lucky to have them!

That said, with that door open, I now have the pre-K teacher trying to fob a couple more 4-year-olds off on me who aren't in any way ready, just to give her a smaller group and make her life easier...you know what they say about "no good deed"....

I have no real advice to give except do what you need to do and go with what YOU know is right. I imagine the director gets a lot of parents who "think" their baby is "gifted" and wish to have them pushed ahead... so when people like us with really advanced kids come along... we're just another "one of those" parents. I know it's hard and I wish you luck. I'm grateful that I'm in a position to not have to worry over it. Since I'm homeschooling my kids... we can go at whatever level they need to be at without people telling me I'm wrong.

Even if she isn't allowed in... you can always supplement with interesting things that she's "in" to and hope they'll move her up later.

Thanks everyone for all the good wishes and support. I did vaguely think that in a couple of months I need to pin them down on length of trial period, but wasn't sure about what would make sense. 2 weeks seems too short, as it did take her at least a couple weeks to acclimate to preschool; at least the 'drop off' part.
Re: onthegomom's comment about being so aware of this early on; it is a LOT easier to see the second time around! We definitely had ' damage' with #1, though we've dug ourselves out of that hole finally!
Lorel - very good thought about having some actual criteria for continuing ~ I think I'm going to check out the county site for what they might have available for 'k' prerequisites and end of year goals...
still smiling

At first read, I thought you were saying that she should have been skipped later, but on second reading, I think you are saying that a skip, in addition to her early entrance, would have staved off the school problems. Is that right?

I was curious if anyone skipped or early entranced, and thought that their child needed it, but wished that they could have had the skip later instead of earlier. Just curious.

Love and More Love,
Grinity

yes, that's an interesting question Grinity, I'd love to hear any responses on that.

I had the funniest chat with another Mom at a preschool birthday party that dd3 attended the other night. There is a boy who just literally has been 'in like' with dd since she walked into the classroom on the first day, he is sooo sweet and funny and nice and forthright that the fact that he has attached himself this way is not the least bit bothersome. He is just so cute. Day 1 when I picked up dd, he is holding her arm and saying he really likes her and wants to know (from me) if she likes him.

Anyway, of course his mom has been getting an earful about dd from him, lol!, and when she met me we just had to laugh about the whole thing.
She asked me why I picked the school and I explained how I appreciated that they would at least leave a bit of a possibility of early admittance to k open for dd (and that I think she's really smart, from what I can tell). The other mom asked a ton of questions about how is that done, does K cost more, her ds4 is already ready for k in a lot of ways (and he would only be about 2 weeks 'extra early'). She knew our county wouldn't accept any child before age 5 to k, and so on, so I knew she'd been looking into it already. Well I was happy to fill her in on the little I knew on the subject, and we agreed it would be really nice if they could do this together! It is a long shot for dd, much more so than for her own son; it would be really nice for them both to have a familiar face...
And I do think this boy is really very smart too, after speaking with this mom, and getting a chance to check out the kids running around, it seemed to me that out of the 15 or so kids at this party just a very few had this same serious 'spark' that I am used to from dd; maybe it is just 'outgoing' personality vs. introvert, but there seems to be more to it.
In any case, dd and her ds seem like kindred spirits, so that, in and of itself is cool.

Hey Grinity,

You probably know our story by now so I wont rehash it but... here's what I've come to appreciate:

* grade skipping has been better for us to do in the early years. Yes, there's some "HOW old is she?" stuff to deal with, but it's all pretty minor. If your child can already read, sitting through a letter a week in kindy/pre-primary/year 1 is pretty torturous.

* grade skipping is pretty treacherous in the tween/upper primary years because of socialisation/sexualisation issues. It was hard for DD 8 to have any street cred among 10-13 year olds when she wasn't allowed to watch M rated movies, watch video hits and generally wasn't up with all the latest goss on TV shows.

So... I reckon skip early during lower primary and then find an alternate path later on (sideways moves, homeschooling, etc.) The caveat to all this though is that I now have come to believe that early entry isn't preferable. All things being perfect, I now appreciate that it may be best to delay entry to school as long as possible...

jojo

Yup - DS13 got a skip during 5th to 6th and it was a lifesaver. Now DS13 is in High School (9th grade) and I'm seriously looking for a way for him to do 9th grade again next year. He really needs that extra years worth of growth now that the grades here in the US are so 'high stakes' - not sure how I'll figure it out, but I have a few ideas. My poor DH can barely keep up!

Grinity

So, are you saying that in hindsight you wish that you had found some other solution to the problems in 5th grade, other than acceleration?

No, I don't regret grade-skipping at all even though we've had to find alternative solutions higher up the ladder. For me, it's important just to find a solution to the here and now and then worry about next year/term when it arrives!!!!!! jojo

I'm pretty sure that all of us could imagine 'better/other' solutions - I would have loved for my son to have the option of a school for PG kids so that he could be with children his own age and readiness level. Unfortunately, the nearest 'gifted' school was 1 hour from our home. Working full time I just didn't feel like I had it to give. I also wish the imaginary nearby school was affordable, and could have started in 1st grade.

I would also have loved to be able to homeschool, or have a local coop that 'got' gifted kids. I wish that I lived near family members who were willing to homeschool my son while I worked.

In hindsight, I wish I had had more of a sense of who I am as a gifted person when I was choosing career path and where to live so that my son wouldn't have been so much of an outlier in our local public school system. LOL@me! But then, I wouldn't be here!

I looked and looked for other solutions to my son's situation, and the acceleration was definitly the 'least worst' option at the time. I don't regret it for a moment. There was no other way given the resources we had.

Love and More Love,
Grinity

Well, had a couple of good/quick chats with the teachers in dd3's classroom. I just took a moment to ask one of them about the idea of dd going to K in the fall, and that I had spoken with the director about considering the matter. I didn't want the director to just ask them out of the blue, I wanted the teachers to have a chance to form an opinion (one way or the other). Teacher 1 seemed ok with the idea, but I think it surprised her a bit so we'll see. I just asked her to observe dd and let me and/or the director know what she thought later in the spring.
When I was picking up dd later that week, teacher 2 was there and complimenting dd on all the things she knows, colors, numbers, letters, etc., and I just figured I would ask if she'd chatted with the other teacher about considering dd for k in the fall. She sounded very enthusiastic once the idea was explained; she said above all, socially dd seems very very confident and ready, so that was good to hear. I know that 'social' aspect can be a big hindrance in a lot of people's minds and can be rather subjective.

Anyway, the more 'traditional' one of the two seemed less enthusiastic, but in the end it sounds like it is probably up to me to just say 'try it'... very interesting!

So OF COURSE the second I have any kind of hopeful feeling about this whole thing, the director shuts me down.
This morning, like clockwork, she tells me dd is just too young. I asked if she talked to the teachers for Paja, she said she talked to the kindergarten teacher. I asked if the K teacher talked to dd. She said no but the teacher just can't have a 3 year old in Kindergarten. (She would be 4.5)

You don't even know how old my dd is and you are telling me she's too young?
And what age did you tell the k teacher she was?

So, anyway, I left the building rather than start freaking out, and called back a bit later to arrange a more formal discussion. She is pretty nice but I am sorely disappointed; being not really sure how much dd needs this makes is harder, for sure.
I just don't know; when it was just going to be an easy trial period of a few weeks I figured it was definitely worth giving it a go. (Now I don't even want to keep her there if that is their attitude - it's just a bad way to look at kids, imo. )

Things I am going to ask about -
when was the age policy created, because I asked about it specifically when we reviewed the school.
what is the curriculum for K vs. Preschool 2
what can they do for dd if she is (wildly) bored in preschool

and, just maybe, I'll ask who I can contact at the HQ to discuss this.

please let me know if anyone else has ideas on this one...
thanks

Sorry you've hit a bump in the road!

Would the kindergarten teacher let your daughter visit her classroom for a day?

My DS5 started kindergarten at age 4.5 last fall, at a school where "early" enrollment is the norm, and it has been wildly successful. The school didn't require IQ or achievement testing as part of the acceptance process, but they did require that DS spend a full day with the kindergarten class. The visit gave the kindergarten teacher a chance to informally assess his social, behavioral and academic readiness. DS was just 3.5 and in preschool at the time, so the day-long visit to a class that included 6-year-olds seemed a little crazy, even to me, but all went well. At this point, nearly a full year in, I can't imagine having done anything else.

That's exactly what I was hoping would happen! Maybe more ideally for a few weeks, but at least give dd a few hours in the classroom, or at least an interview for heavens sake.

Thanks for the encouragement, maybe a visit to the class at this point in time would be something they would at least try; I will probably bring that up. Was your ds reading already at that point? Dd says she can't but then sometimes she does...

I found one other place which is a little more expensive, but if it's only for a year I think we could do it (though don't like the idea of moving her here there and everywhere). They are 100% ok with 4's in K, thats what they do, so I have at least got that as a back up.

The more I think about it the more I think dd will be completely BORED, not just a little, with another year of Pschool.

On the dh front, at least I can say he is completely with me on this, I think he is more surprised by the things dd is capable than I am. He was immediately all over the idea that I really was told something entirely different when I asked specifically about Kindergarten to begin with!

DS was reading fluently at that point, but that's not what the teacher was interested in during the visit. She wanted to see how he would fit in with other kids, behave in a classroom, follow directions, etc. DS actually wasn't able to do the math the kindergarteners were doing that day (he was 3.5 at the time!), but the teacher was really impressed with how he handled that (he flipped the paper over and came up with something else to do). If your school is fixated on age, I'm sure it's the behavioral/social kinds of things they'll be most concerned about as well.


Although my son is the youngest in his class, because he's at a school that does accept 4-year-olds, there are others in his class that are close to his age. I like that that makes his age less of an issue.

One other nice thing about sending him to a school where kindergarten is ages 4-6: when people ask me why he started so young (skipping past friends, neighbors and cousins), I just explain that his school's enrollment policies are different from the public school's. It takes all the focus off me and my son and puts it on the school!

I'm following your journey, because I'm trying to early Entrance DS4 into k in the fall also. We haven't heard back on th yes or no yet though.

MsFriz, thanks for the perspective, I go back and forth on her log, though certainly she is at least mg; looking at a place that actually tests may be a good step since she is not fully reading yet. It's funny in a way; I think skipping would be great for her, most of the time, and that a kid who *is* reading well at 3 probably needs way more than an 8 month skip!

Jenafur, Hi, I wish you better luck than I'm having (this week at least). I am supposed to meet with the Director again next week. Will post back 'results'. Not too hopeful, but who knows? I did send her a note covering most of my questions so she doesn't feel ambushed - hoping to get her in a good mood.

BTW, I better start referring to dd as 4 now...wanted to update this thread to state that I did have a somewhat productive conversation with the director. She is a nice person, well meaning to be sure.
I brought my list of questions, and said I thought that I had some valid questions and a request that dd be observed but that those questions hadn't been addressed and that all I heard was that 3 yr olds can't be in K (trying to be nice, I swear! )
She stated they don't really have a written policy but Dec 31 has been a traditional cut off for kids in K. She said they'd made only 1 exception for a girl who was fully reading (at least they didn't just stop even that child, and in fact said that girl probably should really have gone to first, so that seemed like a ray of hope)
Further 'good-ish' news, she did say a couple things, one that dd is 'very articulate and clearly gifted in language' although I don't know if she was just stroking my ego/understands what I think of when I hear 'gifted'. Anyway, I agreed that I think dd does have great verbal language skills, the way she picks up words in every language she hears, and really pays attention is wonderful. But I said I know there are other aspects to look at and those are where I hoped someone could take a look, have a chat with her, etc.
She said they don't do formal assessments, which I figured on, but they would have the K teacher chat with her, after all. I thought this would be a good point at which to discuss whether if they were feeling ok about dd but still unsure in principal/based on experience, if some outside testing would make sense or help. She did agree that it would probably make sense to have some testing before getting to K, if the rest of the family is id'd as gt...kind of makes my stomach hurt thinking about "testing a 4 year old", but I am considering it.
She is definitely making no promises, but at least I can get an opinion from the K teacher that might be helpful to me.
Feeling ok about this chat, I think she is not bs'ing me, and did say she'd give me some curriculum info, and that preschool '2' would be different than '1', if dd sticks with that route.
Visiting the other school maybe tuesday...

ps, Jenafur, when do you find out? What is the process there, so far?

Posting back that despite what I thought was a lukewarm chat previously, we did get some ok testing results for dd4 and I asked the school director about if she would like to have that info.
She said yes, and that she is looking into something called a "developmental placement", which sounds like a way to move a child up due to developmental need (or presumably leave them at the same level if they are not ready to move up). This has something to do with their teacher-student ratios being in balance, I really don't get it all yet, but I was very pleased to hear she wasn't completely blowing me off.
She said the best thing I could do is try to get a statement from the tester as to their recommendation for placement, so I will see what they are able to do in that regard.

I hope things work out. I know how hard it can be. I was just told by a K teacher that DD was ahead of all of her end of the year K students, and even if DD started K in the fall when she is 3.5, there would be no way she could differintiate enough for her...and of course she can't start K hear till she is 5.5. HUGS to you.

my son is only 2.6 and i am getting him admitted in a preschool.
is it early????
my son is very smart. knows many rhymes alphabets and what they stand for i mean a-apple and also recognises their pics.
he knows counting till 30 is it early for him???
he is very keen to going to school.

I am not sure that is too early, of course it depends on the child and the school/teacher. Many preschools are less age oriented than the older grades, we are in a program which mixes from age 3-5 (supposedly, although I just found out they weight one classroom with more younger kids and the other with more older kids).

The language stuff seems to be less clear/more varied with kids than the math; I do think counting that high at 2 is very unusual!

Welcome to the board, I hope you find some good info.

I am still working on my dd4's possible admission to K, will post more when I get some feedback from the school.

Posting back, I was very pleased to find out that today dd4 was taken over to the k classroom to look around and be observed. I heard this only from the preschool teacher when I picked her up; she said the K teacher thought she did really well!
Then she said the k teacher would probably come into the preschool room as well and see how dd is doing there, not exactly sure what is up with that, but it sounds like the whole k thing might be a possibility after all, so I am very hopeful (although obviously not a done-deal!) yikes!
I am still on pins and needles waiting to hear back from the math/science magnet school for my ds10; he was accepted for the program but they are very short on room, so if just a couple kids are not returning to the school, he still has a shot. Keeping all my fingers crossed.

Well, it's possible (just possible) that they have finally decided to take dd4 into the K classroom. I asked the second preschool teacher if she'd heard anything and she said, as of today, the K teacher had mentioned to teacher#1 that dd was going to kindergarten and to prepare her things for the big 'move'...
I will find out soon for 'real', I guess. Second guessing myself of course, but I think we will give it a try if it really is going to happen.
Ds10 did not get a space in the elementary math/science program for 5th grade, however we are ok with that as he ended up with what appears to be a fantastic teacher for the year at his regular ps and it is very nice that he won't be starting from scratch making friends.

Yea on the possibility! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you and DD!

What a relief! Yippee!
Grinity

Yeah, even yesterday it was still 'up in the air' apparently(!), but I actually got an email today indicating she is ok'd by some coordinator or other to go forward. There will be some kind of revisit around the first month or so. I am taking someone's earlier advice and asking if they would like to talk now about what 'success' criteria would be.

Dang, I really can NOT believe this was ok'd (11 days before the start of the school year! )

Thanks to everyone for good thoughts/info and ideas! Dd4 is really excited

Yippee! Love the idea to ask for success criteria in advance. Will really focus the staff.
Yippee!

Great news Chris. I hope it works out for you and your DD!