My dd was finally tested. She's always had a unique, different presence. Not in an aspie way, just unique. Intense, sensitive and just different. She supposedly doesn't have learning disabilities, though she has slow processing and poor executive functioning. Her personality is INFP. We're awaiting the full report, but the psychologist said she tests around 140 iq in various tests (2 1/2 full days testing). I find myself doubting it and wondering if he's wrong. While she "seems" possibly gifted, in the WAY she is, her accomplishments do not sound like others here. Our psychologist is private. Do they tend to skew high compared to school based? I've read a little about gifted 2e, but the reality is I find myself doubting. Are there other doubters here? How do you reconcile that? Thank you!!

I think this is pretty common. When I play chess with DS4 I have to be careful not to win too fast. This makes me think "Is he really gifted?" then I realize that he is a 4 year old playing chess!

So we trust, but verify by checking regularly with his teachers. We even did private achievement testing at the end of the school year as another check.

On one hand... the 140 could be the highest subtest score(s), possibly not indicative of a composite Full Scale IQ (FSIQ) or General Ability Index (GAI)?

On the other hand...
Early reading, and insightful observations may be among the most widely shared anecdotes. The Davidson database also has lists of early milestones, including this article, Parenting gifted preschoolers.

You may have read this elsewhere in the forums...
With regard to accomplishments, there are widespread myths about gifted kids. For example, the definition of child prodigy is a child "under the age of ten who produces meaningful output in some domain to the level of an adult expert performer" and a genius is recognized by creativity and eminent achievement... new advances in a domain of knowledge. A gifted child may show unusually high potential and ability, and be driven by curiosity, but may not have eminent achievement at this phase of life.

A child may be gifted without being a prodigy or a genius. Gifted children are often known for their intensity, and parents often follow the child's lead in finding enrichment opportunities.

Soon you'll have your report and results, and know much more about YOUR child.

All. The. Time.

I think a lot of us wonder if our kids are really gifted and then they go and do something that you just know other kids their age are not doing, like begging for math at night to help them relax.

Thanks, that puts into to some perspective. I mainly just wondered if other's felt the same. It's a funny position to be in.

We have test results that confirm the giftedness and still wonder if our child is really gifted most of the time. The slow processing speed, deriving weird answers to ordinary questions due to unusual thinking processes, illogical fears etc makes us wonder if our child is gifted or if the tester made a mistake with the results.
And then suddenly, there is a spark of brilliance which again convinces us that there should be giftedness behind it - that and the ability to imbibe vast amounts of knowledge in a short period of time and the ability to do certain things that are too advanced for a typical child of similar age.

Yup.

I think we aren't surprised that DS is gifted, but rather more surprised that he is considered highly gifted, if tests are to be believed.

Something that aeh said (both in this thread and elsewhere) now makes me doubt his LOG. He was tested on the WISC-IV in the winter for no reason other than that's what the private psychologist used. We had no idea the norms were so old, so now I'm wondering how accurate his FSIQ and GAI really are and if it's possible he's closer to MG than HG.

Then again, he finished K this year with some assessments that indicated he should be working on an enumerated list of reading skills that are "5th grade level," so now I'm having doubts about my doubts.

Ah, parenting!

Sounds familiar!

Yes, sometimes I feel that way about my 2nd child, who also scored 140+ on some composites. But he also had comparatively slow processing speed--compared to both his high subtests, and also to my very-obviously-PG older child (whose processing speed was her lowest composite, but still well into the gifted range). Age, gender, and personality probably also feed this for me, as the 2nd child also has very different interests and is much more well-rounded overall, whereas my older, PG child "looks" that way in part because her interests are narrow but deep, and she has no interest in pretending otherwise for social reasons.

Also, keep in mind that a relatively slow processing speed is extremely common amongst gifted kids...so much so that it's one of the reasons GAI is considered a better measure of intelligence than FSIQ for them.

For me, it's a surreal life. Your child is "normal" to you, but not a typical child so of course you'll have doubts. I haven't doubted as much since we got his full report, a lot of my emotional struggles have settled down. Grateful for that, it's been an intense four years. I do still think, "what if the next test results are much lower? Then we were wrong!" But my DS 4 has been obsessively, excitedly doing multiplication verbally all day. I did think, "I bet a lot of four year olds do this." See? That's not a rational thought, but a reconciliation of a surreal experience. It's just surreal and you think there is no way your child can be that different.

Well said.

I had a different but related experience years ago--when I kept thinking a relative's child must have a learning problem or low IQ, bc my only early/young child experience was with my first born son, who did pretty typical HG stuff, though nothing prodigious.

Turned out, the child is likely high average-moderately gifted. Guess which child has enjoyed school, done very well academically, is athletic, musically talented, popular with peers and teachers, and generally well-adjusted? (rhetorical)

I feel this way but also feel that I don't even know what "typical" is since both of my kids seem to have similar ability levels. There are a few areas where the other "e's" (2e) really come out with both of them.

DS comes across as delayed in some areas and very advanced in other areas and this difference is VERY obvious. He could probably be the poster child for 2e.

DD does not come across as obviously gifted, she comes across as average because the giftedness masks the disability and vice versa (the giftedness was more obvious when she was younger) but there are those moments where she can run circles around even me, like solving spatial puzzles or navigating a computer. Of she will say something that sounds very articulate or insightful for her age. I was not expecting her PRI score on the WISC to be 147 and often wonder if there could have been an error.

The day before yesterday, I gave DD4 a sand painting kit and she was pouring sand onto the paper and did not realize that she needed to peel off the paper. Maybe there was another applicant with the same birthday as hers at both of the schools where she was tested and their scores got mixed up.

You earned a literal LOL with that one. Yesterday I told DS12 to get dressed so we could run errands-- he emerged in sweat pants and long sleeved shirt. It was 90 degrees outside. I hadn't even considered the "switched at birth" angle. :P

How does that country song go?

"Once a day, everyday, all day long"

Until she then does something completely, make you fall off your chair unexpected!

All joking aside, I have noticed that my DD will often regress just before another developmental leap right past a milestone - happens less now she is 10 obviously.

She often does absent mindedly dumb stuff but she gets that from me so I cannot complain :-)

Yes! In my case I think it's because DS _does_ act younger with me than with other people. My MIL often sends me emails of clever things he said when he's with her, and I always think - why doesn't he say that when I'm around??? LOL

With me I think he feels free to 'let go' and so what I get to see is all the sensory-seeking behaviour that appears very juvenile.

Also, when we did the vision testing recently I was made aware of just how much he must be compensating intellectually on a minute-by-minute basis for his visual and DCD issues. I think it uses up a lot of his mental capacity and so the good stuff is hidden.

Don't usually have doubts when it comes to his ability to navigate academic material. The asynchrony causes doubts or frustrations, though, when it comes to things like having to tell him 20 times (in a row) to position his face over his plate, so crumbs get on it rather than the floor. Or in things like still not tying shoes.

There are many children on this board who are extremely driven and achieving extraordinary things. I've met - virtually and in real life - many gifted children with voracious appetites for academics at home, for competitive athletics, for musical achievements. Anyone who meets them can easily see what an extraordinary child they are. I don't have one of those.

DS11 gets mediocre grades, isn't interested in sports, and finds piano practice a chore. He'd love to do high school math in elementary (but alas, acceleration is taboo around here). Once out of school, however, he resents spending time on "homework no one else has to do". He easily took on AoPS Algebra - after getting Bs and Cs in grade 4 math. He has slow processing speed, and significant executive function challenges. Few teachers view him as gifted. He's very far from the stereotypical view of gifted as a high-performing, independent, self-motivated achiever.

But living with him, since the day he was born (literally!) - no moment of it made any sense until I discovered Hoagies (8 years later - I'm a little slow). And if you talk to him, really talk, holy cow. The things happening inside that head blow me away. I find it gets more and more shocking every day, as he's starting to get enough math and science knowledge - his passions - to put together ideas that make my head spin. So yes, this board used to make me feel like a pretender, but I think I'm getting over that .

We're horrible, but this is actually a joke in our family (as in, when the kids push a "PULL" door, we may say, "Okay, gifted children, try again.")

Note that the kids both go to a "gifted" school that is specifically named as such, so the "g" word is completely out of the closet here.

Yes, like those times where DS4 will roll around on the bed snorting like a warthog, laughing uncontrollably, and repeating over and over, "You mean butt butt?" while attempting to head butt me.

Or when he mouths the bathroom counter (?!?!) after having just told me in great detail about natural killer cells fighting pathogens. Arrrrgh! Sometimes knowing and doing are two entirely different animals.

Or the sample group music class we attended, where DS sullenly refused to participate, loudly announced that he was "bored out of his mind" 5 minutes in, and only spoke to correct the teachers when they mis-named dinosaurs. Oy.

Or another lack of filter example: sitting down to lunch at some friends' house for lunch, and DS glares icily at their 2 year old son eating with his mouth open. DS mutters under his breath, "what a revolting child."

As you can see, frustration tolerance, using a mental filter, and sensory seeking are extra tidbits we're working on.

Short answer yes.

DS was tested a couple years ago and we slowly came to terms with his gifted label. He's 2e and highly asynchronous so there are definitely times that he doesn't seem it. He wasn't an early reader (although when it did eventually click he went from behind to above level in no time) and he isn't particularly interested in performing at school.

We had to retest him this year to confirm the LD stuff. I have PMs that can prove that I was secretly nervous that his first scores would be shown to be incorrect. Well I guess in a way that did happen - his earlier scores weren't completely accurate, just in the opposite direction than what I had feared. The psych gave me a quick summary of his WISC scores before starting the second day and I quickly emailed them to DH. DH's response - so >99.9, so he's average? He completely missed the line stating that everything was percentiles (that's how they report them up here).... Yup. Just a bit above average.

Sure..

My DS looked very gifted as a preschooler. What made it stand out even more was DS is 4.5 years younger than his sister and she has LD's. Therefore the fact that he was reading & 3 and talked like a much older kid was astonishing when I was struggling with getting a grip on DD's LD's in early elementary. I still see a huge gap in what he can do and what she is capable of and they are 16 & 20. So I've always wondered if I just 'thought' DS was so amazing because he wasn't his sister.

But as he has progressed over the years his obvious 'giftedness' has faltered. The extremely motivated students have been able to overtake him in terms of grades & honors. We finally had him tested last summer at 15 and he is now labeled 2E. He really has a much higher GAI than FSIQ. The low processing & working memory scores really do translate into it taking a lot longer for him to do homework and causes him a lot of anxiety. At this time it's hard to see his giftedness because he doesn't really stand out any more. Parents who knew him in early education will stop me and wonder how he is doing and I honestly don't know what to say because he is no longer in classes with the kids from his gifted program in elementary.

I'm OK with where he is at right now and understand that trying to push him to keep up with all the highly motivated kids isn't the right path for him. But I do question that he is really gifted at times these days.

MichelleC, your description creates a picture that I share and I am happy to see that it is not so isolated. I share with you the "since the day he was born", yes literally. Mine had a stare that was unbelievable, and a little unsettling!. That intensity never wanes. It is so helpful to hear that it can still be a struggle. I have to figure out how to educate her. Drill remedial stuff in which she is behind, or just give it a cursory nod while we pursue more interesting and exciting things... Still so many questions, but thank you everyone who chimed in to offer perspective. We're going it alone besides Davidson/Hogies.