W - Gifted Issues Discussion Forum

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Originally Posted by moomin

Today is the 165th day of school for DD. Just three weeks left! I'm kind of flabbergasted by the degree of success that she's had this year. We're finally in the process of ending the last of the services that the neuropsych recommended last year (some of them we continued because DD liked them... not because we actually believed that they were doing any real good).

It's good to hear a mostly good report. Keep in mind that no child even the ones that seem that way are perfect. And it's good to hear that the school is mostly working with you.

Originally Posted by moomin

Also worrying is the degree to which DD has bought into the notion that teachers are "mean." Some of that comes from her specific experiences, and some comes from her consumption of tween level literature. Suffice it to say, her teacher is NOT mean, and her insistence on that interpretation is the basis for the abdication of a certain amount of personal responsibility.

Have you talked with her about why she thinks her teacher is mean. While it could be an abdication of responsibility. There also might be something particular that gives her that idea. Remember a child's perception is different than yours. And if she is a highly anxious child, it could be something quite small that sets her off. While her teacher can seem nice to adults she is probably interpreting things differently than you. You might get a lot further overcoming her attitude if you really take her concerns seriously, listen to her reasons and try to put yourself in her shoes. One of the key things I see in preteen literature is the feeling of not being understood and adherence to what seems like unnecessary rules.

DS has always considered nearly all of his teachers (and some he barely even saw, such as the one whose classroom they used for DI practice, who is now DD's teacher) to be mean. No amount of persuading will convince him otherwise. He simply sees the world differently, and once he gets an opinion set in his brain, it's stuck for good.

Glad to hear you've had a mostly good year, though -- how well I know the value of a year without discipline reports from the principal!