My DS5 started school in Australia when he was three, but when we moved back to the States six months ago the school refused to put him in first grade saying the transition would be too great and that he was only just five (June birthday). I argued that he would be bored, disruptive, disengaged if made to "repeat" kindergarten. The school held firm and I caved. Now I am regretting that. He is being labeled a "behavior" problem because he can't keep his hands to himself, is disrespectful to teachers and other students, makes noises at inappropriate times, etc. He's been on four different behavior modification plans with limited success on the last one. He now says he hates school, has nightmares, chews his nails until they bleed, and has tantrums indiscriminately. This is all new behavior. I have been in constant contact with the teacher, counselor and principal and have even started taking him to a therapist to deal with the anxiety. I'm thinking about pushing for a mid-year acceleration. Does anyone have any experience with that or thoughts/suggestions for alternatives? They do do some in class differentiation, but it really isn't enough.

Welcome.

I'm so sorry your DS and your family are going through this ordeal. Is the therapist knowledgeable about gifted? Is s/he able to schedule an advocacy meeting with you and the school, to advise the school that the behavior may a "symptom", not the "root problem" and that higher academics which respect his intelligence and give him new things to learn as well as intellectual peers to discuss ideas with... may be the Rx? If not, could the therapist recommend someone?

The situation sounds sufficiently detrimental that it may be wise to pull your child from the school. Is kindergarten attendance required in your area? Could he homeschool/unschool/de-school for the remainder of this academic year, while things are sorted out with the school for possible reintroduction at a future point?

Reviewing academic reports from a prior school, sharing a portfolio of his works, a reading list of books he's enjoyed, taking end-of-year tests, seeing the school's end-of-year outcomes and checking off the ones you have observed that he has mastered... are some of the ways parents have opened a discussion for acceleration.

The Iowa Acceleration Scale (IAS) is the gold-standard for acceleration and you may wish to open a discussion on that with the school.

A few ideas on successful advocacy here.

Wishing you all the best with this - trust your mom intuition - you know your child best.

That situation sounds awful! While he is most likely to be bored and therefore rightfully hates schol, are you sure that boredom is driving the behaviors at school? Perhaps there is also an element of stress in relocating from the other side of the globe and difficulties making new friends and adjusting to a new environment? It sounds like some professional medical help would be beneficial both for your DS and perhaps as support to convince the school to change their minds about acceleration.

Have the teachers looked at it the other way - what would happen if the first graders were moved somewhere and told "here all 3rd graders do this (work 2 years ahead) so just get on with it and cope?

I'd want a meeting with everyone who was involved in the original decision to make him repeat K, tell them that you tried it their way, and now that they've established that they don't know what they're talking about, it's time they give listening to you a try, because you had predicted the exact outcome they're now experiencing, this is a problem they created, and now they need to fix it.

Fallback position... homeschool.

I prefer to put the teacher in the place of the student, "How would you like it?", because like the student, the teacher should be well past the material, too.

I had the experience a few years ago of being in that situation. It was awful. It was awful.as a child too but I wasn't aware it could be different.

Thank you for all your responses. I left a lot out in my original post, so I'll amend here. DS has been talking (full sentences, etc.) since he was 16m; been reading since he was 3; testing in Australia put him in the 99th percentile of first graders when he was 4.5. I tried to provide all of that information to the school, but they didn't want to listen. I guess I caved initially because I was concerned about the transition from there to here, but he is very well adjusted socially. Has lots of friends in school and here in our neighborhood. He does great on his teams (soccer, bowling, tball) and actually relates best to the older kids (2nd and 4th graders) in the neighborhood. So, we are seeing a play-based therapist to deal with the anxiety and bad-kid scenario related to school, but he doesn't exhibit any issues in any other aspect of his life (that I can tell). We are scheduled to do a full (and very expensive) psycho-educational battery of tests that I will use to determine placement for next year. I'm unfortunately not in a position to home school, and while kindergarten is not required I don't want to pull him out of school now as that will be even more disruptive. I've succeeded in getting him pulled out twice a week with a specialist for advanced math and language and lo and behold behavior on those days have improved. I can't tell you how much I appreciate the support from this group and I'm so glad I've found you.

Thank you for your response - the links you included are fabulous. I've got lots of reading and thinking to do!!! Heather