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Howler! Are you sure my son isn't related?? Although he does the screeching, not me. He has to complain about his homework, every day for at least a 1/2 hr before he gives up and just does it. Often, his tantrum takes longer than the work!

The funny part is, that he'll complain mightily about his geometry, then be seen playing math game on the computer an hour later. For him, I swear it's the lack of control that pisses him off. He's more than happy to do it, he just doesn't want anyone telling him he has to!

You have described my 5 yr old! I know its all about control but how do I get him to have an attitude adjustment? He loves to read. He loves numbers.. wemakes up addition and subtraction "games" for me to see if I know the answers lol...I change them to multiplication games. He loves science as well. But to get him to sit down and practice writing or to read to me (he reads to himself and can tell me what the book was about) is a chore

Frannieandejsom,

I'd guess that he hates practicing handwriting and reading aloud because those things are boring, slow and don't feed his intellectual curiosity, and they are much more subject to criticism ("That word isn't pronounced that way. This letter is formed like this, not like that."

Have you tried incorporating things that are fun or that he is excited about into the writing and reading practice? My son, who finds writing physically painful and incredibly difficult, was more than happy to write me pages of mystery clues to find "hidden treasure" or "secret messages" around the house. For the reading aloud, maybe you could ask him to find a paragraph that talks about something that he thinks is cool that he thinks you might not know. Or have him read poetry, like Shel Silverstein, where the sound it makes reading aloud enhances the experience, or passages that tell a funny story, so he can make you laugh.

Unless what you are really trying to teach is compliance - which is not always bad skill to have - but don't expect him to enjoy these things, or be happy about doing them, then.

aculady..
Thank you for those suggestions! No I don't want compliance per say (although listening skills need improvement as well). I want to bring out the creative, expressive and funny child that he is.

Sheila

Oh my.

I could have written that, too. Some days she does the majority of the screeching (punctuated by stomping, hair flipping, and pointed sighing).

That entire "tantrum takes longer than the work" aspect is pretty amazing to see in action, isn't it??

Her personality is such that I simply do not worry about "crushing" her innate drive. Not possible, dude.

I do worry tremendously about the strength of that oppositional streak, though-- because being non-compliant just for the sake of contrariness earns a lot of bad things in life.

I figure if we aren't successful in getting her to understand the wisdom of tempering that impulse, someone with a lot less personal attachment to her is eventually going to do it for us, and it's bound to be a lot more traumatic. But I'm just a dumb adult. What do I know?