New here and feeling very overwhelmed. My ds10 is in 5th grade. We are dealing with multiple issues and are starting to think we need to get more help from the school. I am struggling with what I want them to do.
At school, he is usually a good student. He is well-behaved and gets As and Bs in his classes. He is part of a gifted/talented program in our school system, which pulls him out of his classroom for about 4 hours/week.
At home we have been dealing with anger, rapid mood changes, tantrums, and depression. This has been going on since he was a toddler. He seems to be able to hold it together in school so far. His teachers are shocked when we describe his behavior at home. Because of this, we have not been able to get any type of help from the school system previously.
His behavior at home was disruptive enough that about a year ago we started working with a psychologist who feels our son is dealing with anxiety. He recently decided that there wasn't anything else he could do to help him unless we considered medication. We saw a psychiatrist a few weeks ago who said that he has some aspects of depression, anxiety, bipolar, and ADHD but not enough of any one to make a diagnosis. He started him on an ADHD medication to try to reduce the frustration and angry outbursts. It's only been 2 1/2 weeks, so I'm not sure yet if it is working.
My son has not yet made it to 5 full days of any one week of school. He has gone in late or been dismissed or absent at some point every week. The reasons are varied - belly ache, headache, tired, etc. His grades have been very inconsistent. He does not like his teacher and feels she picks on him and expects him to know things she hasn't taught yet. I don't know if this is true or if he has missed something when he was out or because he was bored and not paying attention.
One of his gifted/talented class teachers has suggested that he is very exceptional in his abilities. I am meeting with the director of the gifted/talented program tomorrow. She seems genuinely interested in his issues and trying to find ways to help him. She has already suggested IQ testing. I'm not sure what she plans to do with that information. The psychologist has suggested we ask for a 504. I have read about these types of plans, but I'm not sure what kinds of accommodations I want to/should ask for.
I worry about his social skills - he doesn't seem to have any very good/close friends. He seems to relate better to older/smarter kids. He had a boy in his class part of last year who he talked about regularly and really seemed to like. That child was skipped up two grade levels part-way through the year. My son was very disappointed to not have him in his class.
I'm looking for any guidance at this point. I hate seeing this bright, creative, sweet boy so miserable. I'm desperately afraid that if we don't take some sort of action, things will get worse in future years. So what do I ask for? What kinds of things can I expect for a child like this?
