Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Learning Environments IB, magnet, homeschool & work? Lots of questions

I haven't posted in a long time because it's been busy & DS has not been the squeaky wheel. However, I feel like I'm neglecting what he needs & should be more on top of things. We're currently dealing with public schools but I'm thinking about our other options. DS could do an IB program close by, to a science magnet farther away in a "bad" section of town or he says he'd love to HS. However, I have to work. I know there are others that make it work - how do you do it? Does anyone have experience with any of these?

He loves science, wants to get his PhD in Biology & go help the oil spill since he read it could be decades before fully fixed. I have not seen anything other than very basic science taught in elementary with my girls. He whips through assignments & misses directions. IB offers more project based learning & the magnet is a science specialty. HS is intriguing but I don't know how to make it work schedule wise. Sorry for the ramble, it's just so confusing trying to make the right choices.

Steph,,
Do you have family members who could interact with DS during your working hours? Do you know anyother families who are currently homeschooling?

I would certianly visit both potential schools and observe what goes on during the day. You will learn quite a bit by observation and then you won't feel so directionless. I wouldn't bring DS unless you are already interested in one of the other schools.

What grade is DS in now?

Best Wishes,
Grinity

Thanks so much Grinity. Unfortunately, we have no family anywhere nearby. That is one of my issues with living here & would love to move when oldest DD graduates HS. However, until then, we are on our own.

That's a good idea to visit. I wasn't sure if that was the norm, I've never shopped for a school before but it makes sense. DS is 4th grade and I feel like he's not showing that interest in learning like he was before. He does mention looking forward to being out of school so he can start being a biologist.

I'd be willing to work nights & teach in the day if it means he can get what he needs & be excited about learning, kwim? Realistically, not our best solution but we'll see.

After posting my original message, I stumbled across a support group for gifted in the neighboring district. I contacted her & they are active. Very excited because I don't have anyone IRL to talk to about these issues. Hoping someone there has been to one of these places!

Hey Steph,
I'm so glad to hear that your found a local support group for gifted kids somewhat nearby....that's wonderful.

Personally I think the 4th grade through 6th grade years are so important to establish that love of learning because a lot of hormonal and brain changes start to happen in 7th that make the social life so much more important - at least for myself and my kid. Think back to your own life and ask your son's Dad what things were like for kids in your generation when the go through that change.

We have a neighbor who homeschools by working nights so I know that can work, but it seems to me that one would need to be a very flexible and energetic person with an fairly independent learner for a child...and a way to lock up the TV and internet during the day. But it is great that your work has that option and your son does sound motivated.

What grade do the science magnet and IB programs start at? I think observing the classroom is the only way to know what they really have to offer. You can hear the 'selling staff' talk for 6 hours and walk away knowing less than when you started, but if you sit quietly for 45 minutes, you will know something real.

Meanwhile, it's a good idea to check out gifted summer camp options - SIG,CTY, etc. At the very least you may be able to get the light shining back in his eyes for a few months. Weekend conferences might be a good stop gap too. It was seeing how much happier my DS looked in these contexts that inspired me to take such extreme measures to give my DS a chance to relight the fire of love of learning.

Best Wishes,
Grinity

Thank you, it's nice hearing confirmation that these are important years. DH is not one to rock the boat and it's all up to me. I will definitely plan to make some visits. The science magnet starts next year - 4-8 grades, and IB could start in 5th but it would be the last yr of elementary for that school so not sure socially how that would go. IB is 6th at the middle school so that's an option. I definitely want to get that fire turned up for him. Thanks so much for your advice!!

IB schools, as a group, tend to be great for very 'not 2e' gifties who are fine with lots of product, organized, ok with being given lots of time consuming projects. If your son is organized, attentive, and has above age group emotional maturity than it's totally not an issue. If not, keep an eye out about how these things play out at your local school.

I wouldn't be worried about joining in at 5th, as my son joined a school in 8th and I was so worried, but it turned out just fine. He said he had 'new kid' appeal. Apparently one can't 'time the market' socially. A better question is 'what is the overall character of the kids in this cohort.' Each year going through has a bit of a texture, and it's great if you hit it lucky enough to be in a group with lots of kids who have good attitude towards school.

Anyway...seeing the classrooms in action is basically the only way to know what you've got to choose from. Good luck!
grinity

I know someone who has kids in IB and they skipped her kids pretty quickly. I do not know how they are as a group, but they seem flexible on age and ability, according to her.

Ren

I had an interesting conversation with a fellow mom at DD's school. Her DH is good friends with someone at the Yale admission office. According to him the Ivy league schools hold IB programs up to high standards and see it as a major plus during the admission process.

I think that if you are successful in an IB program, a lot of schools view this as an indication that you can do the work. I have heard that given the rigid structure of IB, it makes it hard to stand out from the pack. Everyone takes the same classes so everyone looks the same. Also, some people are frustrated that they can't take certain IB courses until junior year even though they might be ready earlier. (This may be a quirk of our high school).

Of more concern to are the rumblings that I have been hearing from GT parents who have kids in our local IB program. The heavy workload leads to high burnout. First of all, about half of the kids who declare IB as Freshmen drop it by Junior year. After successfully completing IB, I'm hearing about kids who are not going to college at all (my nephew) or kids taking a year off between high school and college because the kids hate school so much. One friend's older daughter talked her younger sister out of taking IB because it was such hell. Younger sister still made it into MIT:)

I'm very conflicted about whether to steer DD10 toward or away from IB. On the plus side, it is a high school where it is okay to be smart. On the downside, if you hate school so much that you don't want to continue, it seems to defeat the purpose.