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Odd that this thread was started. I went to pick up DD 4 from school this afternoon and had a note on her folder from her PE coach informing me that DD was not following instructions. Very basic note with not much information. I would have appreciated a little more information such as maybe an example. All I could get out of DD is she was playing.

A little background: The PE instructor is new this year. DD's school is a private school that goes through elementary which is why they added PE but included the preschool 3 and 4 yr olds.

I brought the note up to my friend last night and she was 100% negative about the idea of preschool kids even having a PE teacher. "They should just have recess and play." She went on to argue that organized activities from a PE coach/instructor is not appropriate for this age level. I really don't see a problem with it. PE is taught twice a week and it doesn't take place of recess. I see it as more exercise which is what our country in general needs to be doing for the young population. Also, there are many after school activities for organized sports at this age: soccer, tennis, t-ball, etc.

My question: did any of your children have 'PE' when they were preschool age? And also is it asking too much of a child this age to follow instructions? Of course, I would have liked to know exactly what she was asked to follow and will send a note to her PE coach to clarify this but she doesn't return until Monday.

I definitely think this is the way to go, but even those types of sports are difficult for him. Actually, if he could do them early in the day it would be better. By late afternoon/early evening, his attention is shot which contributes to the frustration of not being "good enough". We tried swim team, but it was very chaotic, and ds was lost. Also, it took the fun out of swimming, which is one athletic activity that he absolutely loves. He's actually a VERY strong swimmer, but he hated swimming laps and was continually distracted by all the activity around him. At this point, individual or very small group activities are best for him when it comes to athletics. We just haven't found the right one yet. I'd really like to sign him up for the rock climbing place. You get a membership, and then you can climb all you want. They even have free classes for members, and many of them are one-on-one or small group (or even just for a family). Anyway, that's another issue altogether. Right now, I'm primarily concerned with how to handle the PE situation. I really don't want the teacher to dislike ds and think of him as a behavior problem. He's the kind of kid who wouldn't break a rule if his life depended on it (at least not on purpose).

I think the Montessori teachers generally really respect the school psychologist's opinions with situations like this. I am thinking of asking for a meeting with the PE teacher and school psych (aka guidance counselor-she is a licensed school psych though). The private counselor will probably have some good ideas too.

The thing is, the best ideas are the ones that require a teacher to alter her teaching style. I'd prefer to find a solution that requires little effort on the teacher's part because I think we'll get more follow-through.

I love the idea of allowing ds to be more of a helper. He really responds to this kind of thing, but is that fair to the other kids? I don't think so, and ds would probably feel strange about having a role that no one else gets. He doesn't want to stand out as different, yet that's exactly what's happening when he has a meltdown.

Hopefully, if all goes well, ds will be at this school for another 3-4 years. I do want to get to know the PE teacher better and establish a good rapport. We'll get a lot more mileage out of this method, I'm sure.

His dad was really into this as a kid, so maybe this would be a good thing for them to do together. My husband is a great bowler, although we don't go very often. I'm sure there are kid's leagues if ds ever wants to try that. Thanks for the idea!

She does a good mix of team sports and teaching individual athletics. In fact, they've been working on tennis lately. DS HATES it! The did Yoga stretching, and guess what? It was BORING! I wish I could put a video on here of his parody of the Yoga class, complete with exact quotes from the teacher about the value of stretching and the mind-body link. It was hard to keep a straight face. The thing is, he needs to get used to doing things he doesn't particularly love. Unfortunately, we all have to do that on a daily basis (or, at least I do!). Right now, they are doing basketball at PE. I don't think it matters what the sport is. DS is self-conscious about his skill level, and in his eyes he never measures up to the others. Even in an individual sport, he'd be comparing himself to others and getting upset if he's not perfect. He sets impossible standards, and then falls apart emotionally when he doesn't measure up. I think at times, he lashes out verbally because he'd rather blame someone else than accept his own imperfection. When he gets home, it's a different story though. He usually begins blaming someone else, and then breaks down telling me how he's the worst one in the class at _________.

Thank you. I will definitely try to handle it this way. You are right. At least she is reaching out to get some ideas rather than just giving up on him.


OMG!!! I can't believe that! I would be scarred for life!

As a former PE teacher, I will tell this is EXACTLY how I handled a boy in one of my classes. He was most definitely light years above the rest of the boys (5th grade, with special ed inclusion), and I really think this is why he was the most misbehaved. So he became my helper, but ONLY when he behaved. I also had 2 other boys help out throughout class and would rotate who was chosen each day (other than the first boy on the days he behaved). It was truly a perfect solution. He never felt like the only one, and the other boys never felt like I didn't pick them.

Thank you for the suggestion. I will definitely talk to her about it, and hopefully she'll be open to the idea.

When I picked up ds today after school, the regular teacher told me that the PE teacher asked about having a "helper" come out with ds to PE. I think she means an adult Montessori sub. The regular teacher didn't seem too big on that idea because she doesn't want to make ds stand out in that way.

She actually asked if I'd like for ds to be able to come in to the classroom with her on days when he's struggling at PE. Again, I don't want him to learn to give up. But, I do want him to learn some way to cope. Maybe that would help him to know he has another alternative. Just having the option might relieve some of the pressure he feels. The doctor said at this point, our goal/plan should be removing anxiety provoking scenarios from his life so that he can experience a some anxiety-free days for a period of time.

More to think about. It's good that they are trying to help come up with solutions. I love his teacher!

How is the accommodations typically used for an ADHD student in a PE class? What do public schools do successfully?

Katelyn's Mom, both of my dds have/had PE as preschoolers (dd6 is now in 1st, dd4 is in pre-k). I also substitute at their private, gifted school so I have seen it in action. Like your school, PE is offered 2 to 3 times a week and is in addition to regular recess. The kids are expected to listen - as they would to any teacher - but the performance expectations are not high. In other words, they are being asked to kick around a soccer ball, rather than play a full-on game. They are being asked to do things like run, walk and gallop. They are instructed on how to play simple games like freeze tag.

To me, it does not seem like too much for young kids. Both of my girls seem to enjoy it (and my oldest is a very "high energy" type kid).