Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Things were going good, now it's falling apart

I haven't been on here for a long time because things were going pretty good. But now I'm back. My DD is almost 8 and in 3rd grade this year. She's a very energetic and smart girl scoring 140 on the WISC-IV at age 6.

The 2nd half of 1st grade was GREAT and the majority of 2nd grade was good. At the end of 2nd grade things fell apart a bit and my DD started acting out (she's the poster child for the book "The Explosive Child"). My daughter complained a lot about the review lessons they had at the end of the year.

Anyway, we got through the last weeks of 2nd grade and had a really good summer. We had a variety of activities from art, music, science and a variety of museum visits. She also devoured the "Brain Quest" 4th grade workbooks and other workbooks and a variety of "Brain Quest" flash card/game things.

So, The first days of 3rd grade were OK but this week was a disaster. We were right back to where we were at the end of 2nd grade. I understand how emotional & gifted issues go hand in hand. The teacher is VERY willing to work with us and we have an appointment with her old counselor from 1st grade.

I'm so tired, drained and frustrated already, and it's only the 2nd week of school. Any advice, anecdotes from similar situations is welcome.

Thanks for listening!

You mentioned she complained about all the review lessons they had at the end of last year. Do you think that's what's driving her to fall apart now since the beginning of school is typically review? If so, maybe the teacher will allow her to test out of the review stuff and substitute alternative work. Other advice is to take good care of yourself so you have the energy that's needed to deal with an explosive child and advocate for her. Good luck!

Excellent Advice!

How about a trial skip to 4th? Her test scores certainly support that she might need more challenging material.

If you haven't been on for a while, you probably missed that I have a new favorite parenting book: 2008 edition of Transforming the Difficult Child, by Howard Glasser. The explosive child book is pretty good, but didn't really give me much direction about how to fix it.

Hugs and More Hugs,
Robin

Thanks ---

Telling me to take good care of myself is something I needed to hear. I feel better already

The counselor we see is a BIG advocate for grade skipping. He recommended it back in 1st grade when we all met with the entire cast of the local school district. However, when he mentioned it half the people at the table jumped all over him saying "Oh we don't do that, yada yada yada". Now that we've been at the school for a few years and have really made our presence known, and have a good relationship with the PTO, Principal, Guidance Counselor, etc, we may have a better chance.

Becky, if you want to explore the grade skip, get a copy of the Iowa Acceleration Scale. It helps you consider all the factors and makes a recommendation that you can then take to the school.

Has anybody identified what the precursors are of the upsets? Often if you pay very close attention and take notes on what was happening at the time of the upsets, you can see what's setting her off, which is then a good clue to how to fix it.

DeeDee

Thanks everyone --- we met today with the counselor and he had a whole host of ideas that will help. The principal is also very receptive to meeting with us and bringing along a bunch of other staff to the meeting.

He said the grade skip would not be in her favor at this point because of her emotions, it would just be "too much" at this point. I think though, because the school is going to work with us that we should get some much needed resources/differentiation.

Thanks again!

Keep good notes. Write down all the ideas that the counselor suggested. Be ready to take notes and record all the things that the school suggests at meetings.

Sadly my experience is that the more 'special effort' the school has to put in - well meaning as they are - the less actually happens.

Also - things may go well, but if you end up back in the same position next year, you want to be able to document what was suggested, what was tried, and what the result was.

Also - take a look at this thread. It's about anxiety, but I think that much of it applies:

http://giftedissues.davidsongifted.org/BB/ubbthreads.php/topics/84968/1.html

Love and More Love,
Grinity

Thanks - yes, in hindsight we realized we probably should have had this meeting in August.