Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Learning Environments Documentary about New Yorkers & Kindergarten

You are all correct, and I take back the conventional reaction that the crying was wrong. Thanks for making me feel better at the times when I can't control my emotions in front of DS :-)

Bronxmon, Thanks for sharing. That was brave of you and I appreciate it. I think the documentary will help a lot of people just in awareness. Sorry you had some bad outcomes from the documentary. I can relate to the worries. It's wonderful you can homeschool. I hope you create lots of wonderful times of learning.

I enjoyed the films. I'm so far removed from competitive admissions here in my podunk town. It was really interesting to see the three families go through the whole process.

Bronx, I really felt for you and I think your son was simply adorable. I hope things are going well for you now.

I only got a chance to watch the first segment of this documentary and came away thinking how differently I would have viewed it before I discovered the challenges that come with navigating the school system to help my DS get the best situation possible. I don't know how the rest of the segments progressed, but what I saw were parents who are devoted to getting the best for their children in a bad situation. If I had watched this last year, I might have thought them to be "pushy parents" but now, I am just in awe of the challenges they are faced with.

I also came away thinking how sad it is that there are schools out there that 80% of the children read below grade level. It seems that we are failing entire generations of children. If I was looking at a school with a track record like that, I would definitely be jumping through any and all hoops to avoid sending my child there.

I hate reality TV, but watched all of this in one sitting!
I found the parents very likeable and �real� and am glad each of the kids found a place. The love and sacrifice for their children is quite evident.

I first posted the OP on the tail-end of a "hot-housing" thread that discussed the recent article about coaching kids for the various entrance tests (including IQ)... but quickly realized that this didn't belong at all. So I pulled it out into a thread of its own.

The three families followed in this film didn't seem to fit in the "hot-housing" box. Instead, as someone has already said, they were simply busting their tails to make the best for their kids out of a bad (or at best, imperfect) situation. I think any parent here, there & everywhere has the same goal in mind. Thankfully, though, not everyone has to deal with the highly-competitive admissions as highlighted in the film.

I've wondered if there is some sort of bureaucratic lock-down that prevents more schools from entering the market in NYC? Seems like there are more than enough people clamoring for a quality education and who are willing to pay for it.

After seeing this, I have a totally different take on the earlier article on the same subject. Given that some schools went so far as to provide the parents with sample tests for in-home tutoring, I don't know that I would spend much time on my high-horse before tutoring my own child to compete. If I was steeped in the Land of Competition that is NYC, I would almost be doing my child a disservice by not keeping the playing field as level as possible. And if this meant placemats with practice analogies and picture absurdities, well, sign me up for the whole set.

Bronxmom, cheers to you.

Thanks to you all for your supportive words. I was half-tempted to just lay low and see what you said about this... I think I "outed" myself to avoid having to read anything more unpleasant on this subject.

I'm sure you guys can relate to having a kid you can't hide things from. The "crying" scene made me cringe when I saw it, of course, though I can assure you that it did him no harm to see me cry.

And the test-prep thing is a HUGE problem here. I understand the impulse, too, but it totally muddies the waters. I did not prep my kid at all. I was actually looking forward to the "4-year-old" tests, to get some idea of what was going on with my unusual child, so I went out of my way not to prep him.

NYC is a bizarre environment educationally, but it's a great place to home school.

Just finished all 6 parts. Though I don't live in the area I know about how tough it is to get into the desirable schools since my best friend lives in NY with her daughter. But they didn't go through what bronxmom had to endure because they moved there while her DD was in elementary school. Her DD was waitlisted for their first choice but got into another top ranked school and the next year was able to get into the school of choice.

The pressures put on these children are intense to say the least and then you have bronxmom's son who is PG with some difficulties so he doesn't fit the mold. It really saddens me how the process in NY has been allowed to be so selective that they pass up a child like your son because they fear a challenge.

But on the positive side, it sounds like homeschooling has been a great alternative ... but I do have a question and I prefix it with sorry for being naive... How are you able to homeschool if you are a single mother?

......

Not that I need to include this but since you brought it up ... I saw nothing wrong with showing emotions in front of your son. If I was trying to critic you from the footage all I could say is I saw a mom who was struggling with limitations; trying to find the best options for her child. A daunting task!

Bronxmom - I feel for you having to go through that to try to find the right fit for your son. He was (and I'm sure still is) such a cute adorable boy with a wonderful personality. The biggest thing I realized while watching the documentary is that my son wouldn't have fit in or made it through that process. He seems similar in many ways to your son and I think we would have ended up deciding to homeschool him.

I'm glad to hear that homeschooling is going well for you guys. I'm seriously considering it for DS (and I guess DD too then) but am holding out hope that the school will work with us but he just doesn't 'fit in' or so it seems these days.

bronxmom, I thought the documentary was very interesting! I think all the families were portrayed in a positive light, and I felt sympathy for all of you. It seems like such a stressful, inhumane process.

As parents we want to put our children in an environment where they are valued and accepted--where they are wanted. Getting all those rejection letters must feel like no one wants your child. I don't think that's true, though. He's going to be fine... he has so much going for him--most of all, a mom who loves him and nurtures his strengths.