Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Bored vs. not challenged in school?

My DS in 3rd Grade is saying he is not liking school. Below is our conversation. The school has made some accommodations but it's not perfect. He can tolerated some too easy work if it's a reasonable amount. His study guides are filled while reading text books. He has 3 or 4 work book pages to do every day in various subjects. My guess is the test books are not in depth enough to be interesting and there is more review than needed in workbooks. He loves science but is bored? This is a challenge because I don't want to overstate his abilities. I certainly don't know if he could skip 4 out of the 5 days of a subject and know enough. The teacher says it's all essential work. But I wonder. She seems like a good teacher but does not have gifted training. Is the IQ test they are going to give able to clarify what he needs?

I'm wondering how to figure out the difference between not interested and not challenged enough? How would one explain that to the teacher? He is ambitious and loves to learn. My son reads frequently and has some many interests. He has always enjoyed fiction and nonfiction.


Why don't you like school? Is it boring?
What makes it boring? Is it not interesting or too easy?
"No, it's just too much work."
I don't see you as someone who minds doing a lot of work. You have certainly done a lot of Math work that was extra.
"Yes, well I like that work" That's good.

What's bothering you at school? "The reading books they have are too short." You can check out more books at the school library before library day. "OK, I didn't know that."

Do you feel like you already know the work you are given to do? "how would I know that? I'm not sure."

He knows the spelling words, Social Studies Study Guides, and Science Study Guides the first day he brings them home. The teacher said she in not reviewing in class. He is learning new material. He learned very little the last 2 years. The teacher said he is learning about managing his work,(he is the 1st done in class), study tactics (ex. highlighting key words), and appropriate expectations for 3rd Grader like paying attention. He doesn't have to study. I told him to try to feel good about getting that large amount of work done and keep going with the work checking habits. He gets a lot of easy As. I also reminded him to look forward to his independent studies that are coming up. I tell him try his best to show what he knows and be responsible so they think he needs more challenge.

Onthegomom,

That could be verbatim a conversation I have had once or twice with my fourth grader. He was grade skipped in first but is still ahead. He rarely puts in effort at school unless he is really excited about the topic. He often says it is boring and he hates group work because he doesn't like to have to wait for his group to catch up. When I ask him if he wants harder work he says yes but balks at extra work. Sometimes he says school is too much work but on further questioning it seems like he means busy work and not too much hard work. It is so frustrating. It is like having a brand new corvette in the yard the it is only driven at 20 miles an hour and I am dying to take it out and REALLY drive because I know what it can do..but alas...it is not my corvette but my son's.

My son is only 6, but we had this conversation daily before pulling out and homeschooling. Now that I'm homeschooling, it's still a struggle to determine the right amount of work with the right level of challenge and keep the work interesting for him. He also complains of work being too easy, but then when we step it up it's too hard or too much. For my ds, it seems, it's a matter of learning to work at a challenge and to enjoy learning again. It sounds like your son is better at working hard; to me your son's situation sounds more like a combination of needing a little more challenge and the freedom to pursue areas of personal interest. I've also seen, through our own experience, how quickly a child can become an underachiever. It's hard to reverse, so obviously the earlier he can be challenged and become interested in what he's studying, the better! Personally I don't think MORE work solves the problem. It has to be more of the RIGHT kind of work. That said, I still haven't found the "sweet spot" for my little guy.

What does your ds love to do or read about? Maybe he could work on an individual project related to an area of interest. Would that be acceptable in his classroom? I know it's frustrating. Wish I could be more help, but I wanted you to know you are not alone.

Wow, I am so happy to see your post today. I don't post much but was coming here to ask a very similar question. My DS sounds very much like yours - loves science, great speller, easy As. I don't really see that he is very challenged at school and not sure how to handle it. He's such a happy go lucky kid that he doesn't complain but I know he would enjoy school so much more if he was pushed harder. We will find him up at 6:45 on Sat am, reading his Social Studies book! From comments from his teacher, it seems it's pretty much assumed he will always get high grades.

So I have no answers but you're not alone! I don't know if home projects would help or if finding an alternative educational path is right for him. It is very frustrating to see him ready to learn and not given anything at school to allow him that chance to really explore.

I would approach the school and tell them what you see/hear from your son. Then ask in a very nonconfrontal way if they had ideas to challenge him? I got into trouble talking about gifted and said the work was boring for my DS. I have since found out from reading those are 2 big mistakes with advocay. I think I hurt the teacher feeling because she is a caring teacher. But it may not be that her work is boring it is just boring for my son because it may not have the depth he needs. Is there a gifted program or teacher at his school? If they don't provide testing you might want to provide that if you can. I would read as much as you can. Look at the DYS program here and read the books they suggest. I also liked a book called being smart about gifted. I'm new at this. There is lots of support here if you need ideas. You could PM me if you want. Good luck.