Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Diagnosis help

I apologize if I ramble a bit as I try to explain my situation.

Our 8 year old son was recently diagnosed as being under the Autism Spectrum Disorder/Asperger's umbrella. He has sensitivities with clothing and with touch at times. In approximately 90% of the photos I take of him he is looking off to the side. He has difficulty with change and he is quick to become angry. He had little to no interest in reading when he was little but just picked it up in K. and quickly began reading into a 2nd and 3rd grade level. We have a very difficult time getting him to complete his homework depending on the particular assignment given. He is reduced to tears and tantrums sometimes. He adopts an "I can't do it" attitude.

When sharing that diagnosis with teachers, etc., they are all surprised. Now the gifted specialist at his school is suggesting he is "just" gifted with OE's (I'm still learning the dialogue).

I have been given lists of websites to learn from but am completely overwhelmed. I guess I am just looking for a little real-life information and experience. In the end I just want to know how I can best help him.

The best advice I ever got was to spend a few days keeping a journal, and then isolating the number one or maybe two issues that bothered ME the most, and then look into them.

Sometimes, the folks who do the diagnosing are really good at helping parents figure these things out - so if you haven't asked for help - ask!

Jumping in and assuming that the homework tantrums are the worst, see if you can see a pattern to the types of work that cause the upsets:
Is it when there is a lot of work?
When the work is too difficult? too easy? to much pencil?
Is it when he is hungry? underexcersized? overexcited? exhausted?
Do rewards work with him? if so - what kinds?

To what extent has this 'crisis' interupted your ability to just spend fun time together, doing what he likes to do?

Each kid is individual, and while diagnosises are helpful, and sometimes nescessary, it's the sum of the individual challenges that really makes the difference, yes?

Love and More Love,
Grinity

Hello,
Well I can see your confusion, it seems like as a parent when you finally wrap your brain around something, someone else comes along and sees something else. Very confusing. I have a few questions and a few comments/thoughts.

First, what was his actual diagnosis? (Was it Aspergers? Was it PDD-NOS?) And who exactly gave this diagnosis? (was it a developmental pediatrician? psychiatrist? Primary care doctor, psychologist or social worker? and were they familiar with gifted children). You mentioned the eye contact, but does he have other social needs as well? What is your gut feeling? When you read up on Aspergers does that seem to fit for you?

You could be dealing with a gifted child that has sensory processing disorder. Or you could be dealing with a gifted child that has Aspergers. It's so hard to say as I don't really know him. Either way, whether he has something on the Autism spectrum or not, if he benefits from social skills then maybe he could receive some social skills training and working on helping him understand emotions and working on self-control and expression of feelings (geez...can you tell I am a social worker or what?). Possibly even someone at school or if you see more of a need someone outside of school. I agree with Grinity's point. I think that diagnosis can be helpful when it is used for obtaining future services and treatment. But it sounds like you have a good idea about what his needs are.

Hope that is somewhat helpful and I would love to hear more about DS8.

Labels for kids like your son are just words that we stick on a cluster of symptoms. If the label can help him to get accommodations that will make his life easier, then go with it. But if you don't feel that the label applies, then don't think of it as written in stone.

My oldest has AS but has chosen not to inform his college. Therefore, he gets a lot of negative attention for his quirks, and no support. A professor wrote on his semester eval that my son would only speak up in class when he got angry, and then he'd make some very interesting points. He didn't get outside of his little box though, unless he had very strong feelings on the subject. I won't bore you with the difficulty he has had in getting a job, but it has been a real challenge. It doesn't matter how smart you are if you can't relate to people.

I just got Jenny McCarthy's new book, Healing and Preventing Autism. I'll let you know what I think after I read it!

Hang in there-