Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Pre-school Milestone charts - are they for real?

Thank You St pauli girl

I've got mixed feelings here - remember that the milestone charts are correct, and we are the ones who are in denial about how different from the 50%ile some of our young ones really are.

I grew up in a household were being normally developing was seen as a a bad thing, perhaps the parents were at fault, and not normal. We pretended that we were normal. It wasn't workable.

I am trying to develop the idea that 'gifted doesn't mean better, it just means having different needs.' I don't think it's unusual for intelligent, successful parents to be a bit smug about their strengths - I just don't think it's helpful, or appealing.

I really, really do believe that each child is a gift and a treasure, no matter how they relate to those averages. But if I hadn't been gifted, with a heavy dose of Outward-Directed-Perfectionism, then I don't think the 'we are better' attitude of my family would have bothered me. LOL!

Grinity

I loved this one under the 3 yo paragragh. �Walks downstairs using handrail and alternating feet. My DD2 jumps down the stairs 2 to 3 at a time. Hmmm...

For some reason "gifted" sounds like "better". I really wish there was a different term. They really should fall under "special education" just on the other end.

I fully believe that all children are gifted in their own way. This is just MHO but for me the most special and amazing children are those with down syndrome. I have yet to meet a down syndrome child that doesn't have that glow of amazement and such huge hearts. They melt me every time I am around them.

And as for the milestone charts... I stopped looking at them when DD was a tiny thing b/c it never measured my child and clearly wasn't worth it. I knew the big milestones and as long as my child mastered those in a timely matter I wasn't worried about her. I, myself, had hip dysplasia and was not crawling or walking in a reasonable time frame which clued my mother into the problem so I had to wear braces on my legs to be cranked at night. And I think that is really what milestones are for ... to catch issues and resolve them.

All children have gifts; not all children are gifted!

"Gifted" is a very specific educational/psychological term, short for "intellectually gifted." It is a different way of learning.

Gifts are things that people do well or that bring a smile to the faces of others.

These are NOT the same things!

I think that the information on the developmental charts can be used by pediatricians to ensure that a child isn't delayed (thus, if the child isn't combining two words by the two-year checkup, they might check him for possible delays...).

The Denver II scale gives a much better perspective. It has over 100 different milestones. They're divided into broad groups (language, gross motor, etc.). The test shows ages at which as few as 25% of children can do something, and goes up to 90%.

A nice thing about Denver II is that is has lots of skill groups. My kids were well before the 25% point on some things (e.g. name 4 colors) and were ND on others (e.g. walk well).

That said, some of the milestones do highlight just different gifted kids can be. "Copy circle" (25% at ~3y3m) springs to mind for my DD4. She was drawing circles plus a few letters spontaneously when she was a couple months past two.

I once met a 7 month old baby who was walking (25% at 11+ months). That was something to see!

It's a pretty fascinating document.

Denver II

Val

You know I have for the most part shrugged my shoulders with the argument for not using the term gifted. This term, another term... we will always have people that find it insulting for one reason or another. BUT I am really getting to the point that I agree with those that hate the term gifted and the idea that it is a very specific educational/psychological term is doing that for me. I roll my eyes every time I read that post. The word gifted is generic period. It certainly does not make the general public think gifted? Oh yes that specific educational term. LOL

So if we are going to hunt down the posts and quickly post the same thing every time someone uses gifted then maybe everyone else is right ... gifted is not a great term for our kids.

And I was saying that yes every child has a gift and are special. So I accidentally typed in the word gifted ... sue me!

One of my kids was walking at seven months. Another started at eight months. It was exhausting, as they had the ability to get around, but no judgment. I used to go to Moms groups and all the other mothers would be sitting and talking as their babies sat on the floor. My kids were all over the place, and I had to follow them to keep them out of trouble.

I've read about a correlation between early walking and hyperactivity. It's interesting to note that my earliest walker was indeed diagnosed adhd, and the 8 month walker probably could qualify for the diagnosis as well.

wow lorel. I have never heard that before. Thinking about my friends with kids that walk early I always thought it had more to do with the fact that they were the second kid and trying to keep up. Definitely makes me reconsider that especially with one who is always on the go and hard to center on anything at this point. Very interesting and thanks for sharing.