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    Joined: Jan 2009
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    Hi Bronxmom,
    I have a DS6 who also hates to write. We decided to homeschool for a lot of the reasons listed above. He is doing much better with writing now, actually with everything. His behavior changed almost overnight with the elimination of stress with school. He was so happy during the summer and when school hit, he basically went into a shell and had tons of meltdowns or outbursts. He was a lot like your son in that some days I would pick him up from school and he would have gotten into trouble for this or that only to find out he had a temp of 100+ when we got home. He never complains of aches, pains, sore throat, rarely stomach aches, but he has tested positive for strep several times. He does not have seizures though so does that rule out PANDAS???? Anyways I think he is just not in touch with his body signals or messages. We are working on that. He was a bear to toilet train and still gives us 2 seconds in the car before we have to pull over. Anyways welcome and good luck!

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    Hi Bronxmom,

    Welcome and congrats on DYS. I do hope you find some help there, I second what the others have said.

    I know nothing about the health issues, so I can't comment. Other than, it sounds very challenging and I know that chronic conditions can be so very draining.

    We are in a school district that is also highly sought out, especially for gifted programs. I was perplexed as to why it wasn't working for my HG/PG girls. We also have an HG magnet that is supposed to be great and DD9 should qualify to attend next year.

    DH and I did decide to strongly request that the school work with us in attempting to dual enroll them. We were also worried about *fall out*, however, it's worked very well. Like Questions and Kriston, we've found that when exposed to a learning environment that suits the way they think, they respond beautifully. And since DD9 is also going to the public school in the afternoon, her performance in math has seemed to instantly improve upon having that break from the whole school day.

    She seems to struggle verbalizing her thought process, especially in math. You have to remember, that most schools follow a very linear and auditory sequential type method for teaching and there are very valid reasons for doing so.

    For some kids it doesn't work as well, though.

    As a parent, it's very hard to figure out what the right path is for a child who doesn't seem to fit well in the school system. It's a little disconcerting to look around and see all the other kids fitting/doing well and wonder why it's not working.....

    It probably took us about a year to figure out a good solution, but we did eventually. I'm sure you will, too.

    It's a journey........ smile

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    Thanks all, reading all this is very helpful.

    About PANDAS-- I think one of the strange things is that everyone's experience is different, so it's hard to create a support group or anything. I had not heard about seizures being related to this before-- mostly OCD and tics and behavior problems. I'm not totally convinced PANDAS is what's happening with my son, but I AM absolutely sure that a certain antibiotic (Omnicef, a global antibiotic) changed his behavior, dramatically, for the better. They have changed him to a weaker, prophylactic dose of amoxicillin (just a few days ago) and I think the strange behavior is coming back... so I am confused and trying not to get desperate...

    I am starting to believe that lots of psychiatric conditions may in fact be autoimmune problems-- related to infections.

    thanks again--

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    Grinity wrote:

    Was this in reply to my question?
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    DS12 just seems to 'need' much more time without anything scheduled then I expect. He also hates having'nothing to do. Go figure.

    That is exactly my DS8!

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    Originally Posted by Dazed&Confuzed
    Grinity wrote:

    Was this in reply to my question?
    Quote
    DS12 just seems to 'need' much more time without anything scheduled then I expect. He also hates having'nothing to do. Go figure.

    That is exactly my DS8!

    Yes Dazy, I was posting from my phone, and a bit limited...

    Let me know what you find that works, ok? I'm still shaking my head.

    Here's another Datapoint: At the young scholar gatherings, he can 'go and go'all day and almost all night for three days with only a melt down or two - which I find amazing.
    Perhaps he is an extrovert and drawing energy from the crowd? At home he is an only, and DH doesn't arrive home until 8pm, so things are a bit to quiet.

    We recently got a Wii Fit for the family, and it seems that he is finally going to get some physical conditioning, so perhaps that will make a difference.

    Love and More Love,
    Grinity


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    Grinity - interesting. DS8 has always been able to go and go and go if we're out at museums or a party or playing at someone's house. He has a 5yr old brother and 2yr old sister, and DH doesn't get home until 8:30-9pm, it's never quiet here!

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    Sorry to take so long to get back to you. I lost the forum! They moved it on me! (Thanks for helping me find it, Dottie!)

    Originally Posted by bronxmom
    thanks, Kriston-- do you consider your son "2E"?

    I'll come back when I want to talk more about homeschooling. I do have concerns-- I'm not sure how it will work for the rest of my family; my son is extremely extroverted so I am afraid it will damage him; also he can be infuriating, and it certainly is not productive to keep him home and yell at him. So I need to be sure I am strong enough to do this...

    It's just such a shame that he seems to be losing his passion for learning-- at age 6!

    I worry a lot about GT kids losing that light, that passion. I think it's a serious issue and not one to be taken lightly. It says to me that something has to change, and fast. Real damage is being done. You're right to worry, I think.

    No, I don't really consider my DS7 to be 2E, though his bottleneck sometimes functions that way. I don't think he'd qualify for any 2E program or anything.

    OTOH, I do often deal with his education in much the same way that I would if he were 2E. Since we're homeschooling, I can do that. I think it would be much harder in school, honestly. It sure was in first grade, where the teacher was VERY concerned that DS was not finishing his work in a timely fashion, and was clearly doubting his test scores and GT ID, though his scores and classroom abilities when given challenging work were in the PG range. *sigh* It was really awful to deal with.

    We had infuriating times when he was in school, but I can tell you that it often (though not always) gets better when the child comes home. Provided you get your needs met so that you're not worn out and stressed out from too little time alone, it can often make a child much more pleasant to be around if he has enough time to work on his own projects and work that keeps him challenged. This was the case for us.

    That's not to say I never yell at him, of course. But it is SO MUCH BETTER than it used to be. A challenged GT kid is often a happy, pleasant kid. Our DS7 made a total behavioral turnaround once we brought him home. He is now generally very pleasant to be around. smile

    Here's one way to help you decide if it might be better for you behaviorally to bring your DS home: think about your son during the summer. Is he easier to get along with than he is during the school year? If so, school might be part of the cause of the infuriating behavior.

    Secular homeschooling is much more common than it used to be, and that's good for extroverts because it means that there are lots of very active homeschooling groups around that meet frequently. I know there are some active in NY!

    We're even sending DS7 to homeschooling "school" one day a week, complete with classes and recess and Legos and people to play with them! I'd bet there's something like that where you are, too. Co-ops are parent-run, and there's probably something like that around, too.

    I'd recommend doing a little research into what homeschooling groups and opportunities are available to you, even though you aren't really ready to make any decisions. Just knowing whether it's a valid option or not will give you some peace of mind. You know?

    Also consider finding a sitter or homeschooling friend to share the social burden of taking him to group activites if you need a fair amount of time alone. Personally, as an introvert, that's one of my big problems with homeschooling--to get him the social time, I often have to be social, too, and it's exhausting to me. That's part of why I say that you will need to be sure that your needs are met. If you are exhausted and cranky, it won't matter if the educational fit is good. Any solution you choose has to work for everyone in the family.

    Now, if you're an extrovert, too, you'd be in heaven with homeschooling! wink Really, calling us "homeschoolers" is a misnomer, for we're very rarely home! grin


    Kriston
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    Kriston wrote:
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    We're even sending DS7 to homeschooling "school" one day a week, complete with classes and recess and Legos and people to play with them! I'd bet there's something like that where you are, too. Co-ops are parent-run, and there's probably something like that around, too.

    Sadly there is nothing within an hour. I'm not in a position to start anything either. But I Think that is unusual.

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    Hi all,
    An update on my son. At the beginning of this week, I was forced to change his antibiotics from a strong, global antibiotic to a prophylactic dose of amoxicillin... On the global antibiotic his behavior was good, his affect relatively calm, he listened and focused-- though at the same time he was strong-willed and excitable as many of our children are-- a regular stubborn HG+ kid... as soon as I switched to the amoxicillin (within a day) his color changed (flushed), his eyes turned glassy, and he became extremely hyperactive and was no longer able to control his irritating impulses. We find ourselves shouting at him. With each passing day, it gets a little worse.

    So all these other conversations about how to help a brilliant but uneven kid are beside the point for me really... There is no point trying to teach him anything when he is like this. I don't even think I should send him back to school (they've been on winter break this week.)

    I am crushed. It is also affecting my marriage, because my husband, though he notices the change, does not think it's that big a deal, thinks I am overreacting, and hates the fact that I am obsessed with this child.

    But I feel deep, deep in my bones that something is terribly wrong!

    I just spoke to the pediatrician, who referred me to an ENT specialist. His tonsils are probably chronically infected and need to come out. But the ENT person has no appointments until March 28.

    I know this has nothing to do with GT stuff but I am at wit's end.

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    bronxmom, I just realized that I had sent you a pm some time ago, and it still shows unread by you. Click on your flashing envelope if you want to read it.

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