Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Asperger's?

I just wanted to add that while we have all said that some of the social skills problems that you see in aspergers can be seen in lesser degrees in some gifted children and be completely "normal", if there is such a thing, I would also like to stress the following- Just because a child doesn't have aspergers doesn't mean that they may not benefit from social skills teaching. I don't want to forget that. Someone told me that it doesn't matter as much the diagnoses as long as the childs needs are met.

I totally agree, even though my DS doesn't have a diagnosis and doesn't meet the criteria I still focus on doing some things that don't come naturally to him and challenge him in those ways (ie: eye contact when he is talking with someone and looking off into space, pretend play, some social skills in playing with peers, etc.) It's not like he doesn't have those skills at all, but it's helpful to build those skills up. I teach social skills to children all day long that don't have diagnoses, it's just good to learn those skills, and especially to start at an early age when you can.

Hi chris#!

Oh for pete's sake! finally someone finds a pediatrician who gets that 'poor classroom fit = poor behavior' at just the moment you weren't looking for 'that kind of support!'

I would definitly follow up with the neuropsychologist and an audiologist who does a lot of testing for CAPD. I paid out of pocket to get a CAPD test from an audiologist last summer. The folks at the testing center thought I was nuts when I called asking to spend my own money, but I explained that given my son's 'above grade level' performance in school that I would rather spend the money for the test privatly, than spend the energy trying to get the school to do as I asked. I was my charming best, and got an appointment, and an assesment, and the tester threw in that my son 'certianly didn't act during testing the way the other kids who are there to rule out CAPD caused 'ADHD-like' behavior' act but of course quickly added that she isn't qualified to diagnosis ADHD. She thought that DS12 was charming and hard working and compliant - and she was with him for several hours. And she ruled out hearing or CAPD problems. DS12 is a great kid, but he certianly has his moments. Apparently strong willed and asynchrouous development are enough to make a kid look like an SOB in a poor fit school setting. (( Is there a positive spin word substitute for SOB? I really can't call my son that, can I? He's nice at home....))

Now - as far as Parent Rating Scales. I have a beef with them. I found out the hard way that it is impossible for a parent, who is also gifted, and perhaps also OverExcitable, and perhaps also meticulous about telling the truth and a has a very strong and long memory and maybe a bit on the 'dramatic' side to fill out these scales accurately. Between our Inner-Directed Perfectionism and our Outter-Driected Perfectionism, it's really difficult to ask us to do a parent rating scale that isn't normed to other Gifted Parents. That's my position and I'm sticking to it!

I would encourage any parent who has to fill out one of these to put on their "If I were of average intelligence, how would I view this situation?" hat while filling out one of these 'Parent Scales' and to look at the results with a grain of salt, oK? I really would love to see these parent scales 'renormed' for parents like us!

As for warning against involving the school, I don't remember anything about that right this minute. If you can pull up a quote, I'll try to explain. Most of my ideas are very context related. My only hard and fast rule is - there is no hard and fast rule!

Big question is - all this stuff costs money. Have you got it for this kind of 'investment?' If you don't, then you have to go through the school. If you can afford it, or get the insurance to pay some, I would just do what the pediatrician reccomends. Do something, yes?

Your pedi sounds quite wise to me!

Love and More Love,
Grinity

LOL! Well, given what it means you're saying about yourself, I think I'd find another option.

"Creep" is usually my word of choice for those moments. At least it places the blame for the behavior on him instead of casting aspersions on me!

Grinity - thanks for responding, didn't mean to throw down the gauntlet or anything

Yes, our pediatrician is pretty darn good, thankfully. She is the same dr. who sent us to the emergency room after a couple days of very serious illness this summer with Ds - again, thankfully, I think she headed off a very dramatic case of dehydration and saved ds' body some real damage! Also, she is pretty young and I think that helps too.
Looks like we are in some luck on insurance, so I am going ahead with developmental ped. appt. this next week (I also posted to another thread, bad form, I've cut my posts in 2 on this subject

Anyway, I think it was the '68 point diff between GAI and...' thread, 2e area.

It is funny you should say this: "I really would love to see these parent scales 'renormed' for parents like us!"
I did go through this horrible first reaction of 'Omg! He is 'very very often' on the first 15 or so symptoms!!' Then I re-read about look only at 6 months, consider the kids age, and I was able to back down the drama considerable. I absolutely tried to be honest, but you're right, I just did my best in the end. I imagine the teacher' scale might unconsciously hold more weight with the doc...