Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy philosophical question (another)

That's why I say don't feel like you have to have a great comeback. I mean, prep one if you can now, of course, but realize that you don't have to play that game at all.

If you're confident you don't have to think fast!

This reminds me of an RV I saw with a VW bug hitched to the back. The RV's license plates: I pull. The VW's plates: I push.

master of none - your questions get my bp up. lol

I agree there can be different ways to answer, depending on who you are talking with and how you are feeling that day - deflect with humor, offer genunine information, etc., etc.

In other areas of life where people have made clueless remarks, assumptions or comments, I've found my DH's advice to be just plain indispensible:

"Why do you expect them to understand? They won't; they can't. Just let it go."

Having said that, I will also humbly submit that immediately saying, "yes, I agree" sets a good tone, like others have suggested, and then not saying anything more can really work well. Just let it drop (unless, of course, you are speaking with a school and need to advocate).

I'm certainly glad Barack Obama's mother was concerned with keeping him challenged, but it might be too political an answer. This was an interesting article about Obama's mother and I pulled out a couple parts that fit with our discussion.

http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1729524-1,00.html

Ann was herself clearly gifted and highly motivated as was her father. She hung out with very smart people, too. It is not clear how much pressure she put on BO versus how much came from him. She also had her own interests and no doubt BO had to be on his own from time to time - and in a foreign culture. Their early pictures together reveal BO to be a very precocious kid. Its interesting to speculate between the lines of her life and the photos and comments from friends, both in the Press and what can be found from careful searching.

BO is certainly a Gladwellian Outlier as is Palin. Both possess enormous native intelligence and iron will, and both took advantage of unique opportunities at all steps in their lives. Both have formidable, successful spouses and a strong family life and supportive parents who pushed them and then did not stand in the way.

I'm reading Outliers and keep thinking about it in relation to the Cradles of Eminence book. BO and Palin would be good additions for the next edition. It's too bad Ann didn't get to finish her memoirs because the little I know about her story is fascinating.

Didn't read other replies so hope I don't repeat...

Kids need to learn that they have to do things they don't want to. True, and that is why my kid has to do chores and things at home...but kid's don't actually learn when they do things they don't need to.

If they move ahead, they are going to miss something and it will cause problems (make them fail) later. If they stay behind, they are going to miss something and it will cause problems (social/emotional) later.

Children who are ahead, need to learn to work with their peers at their level. How well they can do this is an indication of their maturity. When children who are ahead work with peers at their peers level, that shows their tolerance, not their capabilities.

There is important learning in how to behave in the classroom. If we move a child up, they will learn that misbehavior gets them out of the work. I don't get that one...classrooms should have behavior plans at all levels. And children are not accelerated for misbehaving...or else there would be lots of accelerated children in schools.

(an older teacher to a younger one) Don't worry about the kids in your class that are inattentive and you can't seem to reach them. I've seen lots of them grow up to be brilliant in their careers. And I have seen a lot of them that continue to be inattentive and can't hold a job.

Somehow Martin Luther King managed to learn to work with his peers despite skipping grades.

I read the part that he skipped 9th and 12th from multiple sources. I'm not sure how the math works that he would skip 2 grades and go to college at 15. Maybe early entrance to K?


http://www.hofstra.edu/home/News/UR/ur_mlk.html

That makes sense Dottie and thanks for the explanation. I guess in today's frame of reference that would be "early entrance to Kindergarten" but it was normal back then.