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We've had this exact experience....who else?



Dissapointingly formulaic......
It's illegal to say that any child cannot be accomodated in public school. Thus, the official mantra: "your child is being accomodated well, what are you complaining about"

In defense of administration: Here, they have attempted to be flexible and provide unique solutions. It still hasn't worked remarkably well, like offering up a band-aid for a sucking chest wound in one instance. Well meaning of course, so what now?


Yeah, and I wonder if an exceptionally or profoundly gifted college student was ever written off by a professor as "not that smart", or "just doesn't get it" because the professor doesn't understand very very superior cognitive process? That would probably never happen..........

When do you dig in your heels and when do you decide it's not worth the effort to keep swimming upstream? Until there is a federally mandated IEP process for IQ scores that fall within a certain standard deviation above the mean we have weak legs to advocate on behalf of exceptionally and profoundly gifted students.

I would love to hear everyone's take on this.

In our GIEP meeting the other day when we weren't making any headway with a plan, I said that DS was profoundly gifted in math and that the curriculum as it exists will not meet his needs. The principal said "Well, it *is* public school...." If any system is supposed to meet the needs of ALL individuals it's public school.

After our brief experience with brick and mortar school options, we pulled our kids then 2 and 3.5, and decided to home school. So, I don't have much to say on this, yet. We are tossing around the idea of using a public independent study school; I may have lots to say by this time next year, if we go that route. I'm not sure how helpful that will be as testing, identification, accomodation isn't required until 3rd grade here. My hope is that they'll be able to give me access to more materials and services, but if not I am prepared to go it alone.

We got:
�there are other kids just as smart as h(im),�
�it�s a challenging curriculum,�
�the teachers differentiate,� ((And they did, as we moved along the advocacy process, still too little too late, though))

and then we got:
"Were you grade skipped? We find that parents who were gradeskipped often think that it's the only way to help a kid, but it isn't!"
and
"Our math specialist spent time with him, and he really isn't a deep thinker in Math." (This in 4th grade - all we were asking for was subject acc into 5 th grade math - like how much deep thought is required for 5th grade Math?)

But looking back, what alarms me the most, is that the school just seemed unable to believe that a child might have a 'mind of their own' during the elementary school years. Thankfully there is more of a recognition in Middle School that a child might have their own wants and needs seperate from the local Adult expectations. I want and expect my kid to express himself politely, and be kind to others, but, looking back, the very idea that he had a mind of his own seems to be what the finger pointing was mostly about.

((scary))
Grinity

That is scary!

We heard: "Well the second grade teacher reports that she is middle of the pack for math"

Me:(already been around the block a few times; so sad)"What are you basing this assessment on?"

-"Ability to recall one digit addition facts with time element"

Oh, for real......girl was multitasking-evaluating condition of nails to determine next needed manicure, formulating workable and marketable plan to solve world energy crisis, while mentally chanting: Find a happy place, find a happy place, find a happy place.......

I must say that the series of emoticons used in your post speak for themselves!

Warning, this is very long!

I am in an avoidance flight pattern, at the moment. My daughter has been given some "unoffical" assessments (no IQ scores). Still even with this written information, letters of reccomendation from professionals in child development, psychology, special ed teacher (gifted program), etc. When I approached some schools for early entry, etc. it quickly devolved into a "Stop pushing her!" and the notes, etc. that I had were dismissed. For no other reason than her age.

The really amusing thing in a sort of way was that I had brought my daughter with me for the first meeting with a school. I wanted her to see the school and observe the other kids to see how she reacted, etc.

Here's what happened: When we first arrived at the school, we checked in and waited a while. Boo is sitting there drawing and chatting with me. I notice a couple of women that looked like they were watching us, but I wasn't sure. I went to the receptionist to turn in some forms and one of the women went over to Boo and started talking with her.

The conversation went more-or-less like this (my memory is a little fuzzy as it was about two years ago. I forgot, which Frog and Toad book she had read).

"Are you going to be starting school here?"
Boo, "I think so, but we aren't sure, yet".
"Well it's a nice school, I work here. What things do you like to do".
Boo, "I like to read. I just read Frog and Toad and thought it was really funny. Drawing is great, too. See the guy in my picture is fishing. He's on a raft, kind of like Huckleberry Finn in that book by Mark Twain. Did you know that Mark Twain's real name is Samuel Clemmons? ".
"Oh your mom reads that to you".
"We read it together"
"I think you're going to be in 1st or 2nd grade. That's my guess, after talking with you".
"Oh no, I hope to start Kindergarten!"
Cue surprised look, abrupt end to the conversation - the woman left very quickly - and start sequence of impending doom.

The entire time I had been by the receptionists desk, completing another form, while watching/listening to the woman (I didn't know who she was, at the time) and Boo talk. The other woman who had been with her earlier was also observing.

I sat back down next to Boo, who commented "Well, that was weird!" and shrugged her shoulders. About five minutes later, we were called into to see the admissions coordinator - or so I thought. Instead, we met with the principal and the school psychologist - the very same women who had been speaking with and observing Boo in the waiting area! They saw her in action and thought she was in at least 1st grade, and even said as much. So this would be easy! Right?

Wrong, wrong, wrong. So wrong it hurt. The responses were very curt.
Principal, "We notice that according to the paperwork, Boo is only about 3.5 years old. She is too young to start Kindergarten; she needed to turn five by last December".
Me, "I'm aware of that, I am here to petition for early enrollment".
Principal, "There's nothing I can do".
Me, "Well, here are various documents regarding her development from various professionals".
School Psychologist, "These are all based on observation and the pediatrician is in general pediatrics; her recommendation means little".
Me, �What? In the reception area, you stated that you thought Boo was at least in 1st grade. You based that on your observation of her.�
Psychologist: �I was in error, it was a short conversation�.
Me, �Okay, but you base a lot of your recommendations on observation, yes?�
Psychologist, �Yes, but I fail to see your point�.
Me, �Why not trust your instinct then? Why suddenly discount it when the only thing that has changed is that now you know her age? That doesn�t change anything about your earlier interaction with her. Also, why are the observations of a medical professional that has known Boo for years, dismissible?� (By this point I am feel a bit, ).
In jumps the principal: �We here at, School Name, believe that all children should have the chance to be children. Pushing a child is against our core values.�
I didn�t know what to say after that; so I just grabbed my things, muttered �thank you� and Boo and I left.

This was my attempt at �holding on to hope� after the parent/teacher conference with her preschool teacher. I had already been thinking about having her start Kindergarten early and after receiving comments, such as, �she has to learn to be bored:� by the preschool teacher, I thought I�d take a stab at it.

I gave up on that.

I think the flipping the bird emoticon needs to be created in honor of that story!

So what did you end up doing?

When I visited our local public school this fall with the intention of exploring early enrollment to kindergarten, from all I�ve read, I expected the school rep to either dismiss me as a pushy stage mother who thinks her kid is brighter than he really is or admit that my kid was bright but minimize my concerns about lack of challenge in the regular classroom. I wasn�t at all prepared for what happened instead: once she had heard just a few examples of the things my son was doing at age 3.5, she told me he�s a statistical anomaly who will never find true peers or a good educational match in any school, so we should forget about acceleration and focus on teaching him to �fit in� with kids his age.

I heard:

"Even if he finds the solution to world peace, it won't do him any good if he can't tell it to anyone" (Why presume he wouldn't be able to do both just because he started kindergarten early??)

"Gifted kids are at risk for depression, and skipping grades increases that risk during junior high" (I wanted to hit her over the head with a copy of Nation Deceived or Genius Denied)

"Although you're doing your job by advocating for your child, you need to lower your expectations" (I didn't and have since enrolled my son in a very promising private school where early enrollment is the norm and all kids are taught at the level of their ability)