Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Learning Environments Adults who were accelerated themselves?

I recall being in with the 4-7th graders when skipped out of 2d. I felt VERY SMALL. I recall walking into class up the center aisle with all the kids looking DOWN on me. LOL. I think I cried. The next day it became fun. Going back to age-peer classes after three accelerations was the most traumatic event of my childhood. My dad told me over Thanksgiving that I all my test scores were at HS level with reading being the highest.

Montana, I was radically accelerated when the school districts took the time to test me. I was very happy with the arrangement because school work became interesting and challenging and I made interesting friends. The easiest skip was spending time with the higher class for 1-2 hours a day then starting with them after Christmas break. The other accelerations were a straight jump within the same school and a jump when we moved to a new district. The latter was pretty easy as well - from 7th grade to 10th with part of the day spent in 7th - I just walked across campus to HS.

My DW skipped first grade with no issues when they moved to a new district. In retrospect, she thinks she could have jumped from 7th to 9th or 10th grade, too. Her interest in school really waned in the 8th grade and she recalls being very bored.

I have a work colleague who was radically accelerated within the same school system for his whole education and was very happy with it, too.

Tagging this onto the the end of this thread. My story is a bit different, as I wasn't accelerated in school - well not *exactly*. The option for multiple grade skips was presented twice during my years in elementary school. An offer from 1st straight to 4th was declined by my mother and another offer during 3rd grade to 7th was, also, declined. Both times my mother reasoned that she did not want me to be around older boys. I remember pleading during the 1st grade meeting and leaving in tears. I managed, over the next two years, to remain fairly optimistic about school. Then came the 3rd grade meeting, I had been aching for. Again, my hopes were dashed. I distinctly remember this audible click inside my head and I officially gave up on school and became the classic under-achiever - still received mostly "A" grades.

During the summer after my 6th grade year I became very ill and had to be hospitalized for about a year. Despite this, I completed all of 7th grade work via independent study within my first 4 months in the hospital; so they sent me 8th grade work.

Fast forward to when I was healthy enough to return to school. I was surprised to be on the middle school campus, as I fully expected to be starting high school. I was in a wheel chair and with the claim that I needed special accomodations the school placed me in 7th grade special education "classes". By classes I meant I spent all the time in the library and didn't get any actual assignments - there were none to give me, as I'd already completed middle school - or even see a teacher much of the time. I'm an avid reader, but much of what was in the small library I had already read and we spec. ed. students were required to stay in a specific area of the library. There must have been an invisible trigger for a silent alarm, because the moment one of us left our designated area a librarian was there to admonish us and send us back where we belonged. All that to say, I was in effect held back and in spec. ed. classes for two years.

At the end of 8th grade, I decided on two things a) I was going to walk again - no matter what, and b)I was done with school. So by the time the first day of 9th grade came about I was, indeed, walking without assistance. Then I approached my mother. I made my demands quite clear, either she sign the papers to let me start taking college courses or I take her to court and start emancipation proceedings. She signed the papers and by the time I was 15 I had two Associates degrees, started two different business that were fairly successful. (I made enough to purchases two houses by the time I was 19 years old and pay off all the student loans I had incurred.)

I must admit, I still haven't finished my Bachelor's degree. I actually, have enough credits, minus a small handful of courses, to graduate with degrees in, at least, two majors. I joke that I should have multiple doctrates and my husband agrees and always says that it would "be so easy for you". It simply isn't my focus right now, and that's okay.

Anyway, that's my accelerated adult story.

Mizzoumommy, that sounds amazing - have you thought about writing it all down?

I desperately wish I had been grade skipped! I was in a rapid acceleration program in what was my normal K year. Then my parents were forced to move states for employment. I landed in 1st grade in a regular public school with no GT program. The teacher sent me to the hall to read my chapter books because it hurt the other kids' feelings. You can predict how it went from there. My parents didn't know enough at the time to demand more from the school and just did what was available.

By my freshman year of high school I only hung out with older kids, had managed how to get exactly a 92% in all my classes so I looked smart but not that smart. I also became obsessed with dance and spent 3 hours a day in dance classes. I was pretty miserable until college, when I had to learn immediately that you have to actually open the books sometimes to pass the tests.

mizzoumommy:

I second that you need to write your story but also I just want to say how strong you were/are. To be able to stand up to your mother is not an easy thing by any means but you did what you had to do. I know people say it all the time but it is so true. Dealing with adversities in our lives just make us stronger and you clearly had your share full at such an early age.

mizzoumommy - wow. That is a jaw-dropping story. How can a school that had earlier offered multiple grade skips, and that knew you had already completed the curriculum put you in a special-ed class (which by the way amounted to child abuse for all the kids in it)? yikes. You have overcome so much.

CAMom - I'm with you. In retrospect, I wish I had been accelerated. I didn't even know that was an option at the time, though. Luckily, i had some last minute acceleration (took all my senior year classes at the local university). But by then it was too late, underachievement was fully formed.

As a matter of fact, I have been considering writing a book about my experiences growing up and, now, as a home schooling parent to precocious children.

Regarding under-achievment, I am right there with you! Although, I took matters into my own hands and pushed things through for the sake of self-preservation, I still have habits of procrastination, hiding my abilities (even with real-life friends that would, probably, be accepting given the chance, etc. Admittedly, I wonder if my current brand of under-achieving comes from generally feeling like I am carrying others. When I organized a group for new parents, I was the one who came up with and followed through with ideas for events, etc. 90% of the time, for example. I don't know if this was because, people truly didn't know how or because they'd rather have someone else do all the leg work. Perhaps, it was a combination. Regardless, it left me feeling a bit bereft and a little used. Still, not sure if this is a gifted thing or not, but it does seem a bit cyclical. I am trying to break the habit of being the driving force things all of the time, but then I feel like I am being a slacker - which I am, as I could easily do it, but I am learning that sometimes it's okay to let go and slack off a little.

Does anyone else out there relate?

Yes, I think overachieving (in the sense of doing more than one wishes to or more than the others around one) can certainly be as bad for someone as underachieving. Carrying others is not a good feeling.

I was a driven little kid, and I think it was unhealthy for me. I don't want that for my children or for myself anymore. Choosing our priorities has become very important to me, and not everything has to be done perfectly by any of us.

As an adult, I am definitely trying to take a backseat more often in organizations. I usually only step in when two factors align: 1) the event is something that the kids and I are really excited about, and 2) it won't happen at all if I don't step in. If the program will be run differently/worse than it would be if I ran it, but it will happen, I just keep my nose out of it. If it is run so badly that it offends me, then either we quit or I volunteer to run it the next year. I think this has happened twice--once we quit and once I stepped in. Mostly though, I just work to bite my tongue and accept that things won't be done my way. <shrug> I'm learning to get over it.

I think a little slack is a good thing, especially when you're homeschooling. You already have a lot on your plate!

I go in expecting that if it's important to me, I'm going to have to do the work to make it happen. That way I'm pleasantly surprised when someone else takes something off my plate. It helps keep me from becoming a cynic and doing nothing.