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Overexcitabilities and SPD still confuse me and I feel like I should have this all figured out by now.

I know that in swimming lessons the other kids don't mind jumping in the pool and having water splashed in their faces and they don't get tired as fast and they don't complain that the water is too cold and have to slowly work their way in. It just seems like he has to work through a lot more issues than other kids and now he is at an age where he finds it embarrassing to take lessons with 6 year olds. He says he thinks that he could teach himself if given the time to adjust to the water and play around but when I take him to the pool, he spends all of his time watching much younger kids do what he can't, and he is embarrassed to try to do anything around other kids.

I would love to find a college student to work with him but I don't know any and I don't think just anybody would be able to teach him. How do I find the right person?

Oh, crud. Obviously I misinterpreted your meaning, acs. Or perhaps over reacted to what you were saying, me being up on my soapbox and all. sorry. I took "issue" to mean disorder - which is just how I interpret or use that word.

I agree with you about the OEs. My son is the same way as yours, often focusing on some sensory aspect of an activity or task and then not being able to participate fully or complete the thing. But I just see as part of who he is and something to be accepted and accommodated.

Lori, have you tried a local college job board? The wording of your ad and the interview process should help identify the "right" person - you'll know when you find him or her. Do you have a local YMCA? Maybe private time with an instructor to build confidence and abilities? I don't think there's an easy answer to this situation. But if he is motivated to learn I'm sure you can problem solve a solution.

No worries! I value your expertise and like many people on this board have benefitted incredibly by it. The real problem is that the terminology in the gray areas is really hard. Issue? Problem? Disorder? Oddity? Quirk? What do you call something when it is noticable, but not a disorder?

When DS and I were at a homestay in Central America and he wouldn't eat any of their food except ice cream. I knew it was because of his OE's but my Spanish wasn't going to let me explain that concept clearly. All the women in the family were panicking because they wanted to find something for him to eat because they wanted to be good hosts and I wanted them to calm down and let him either go hungry, which wouldn't kill him, or even just let him eat just ice cream. And they wanted him to like their food. I told him he had a "problema" and told them that eating ice cream was OK. Then they wanted to know if he was getting treatment for his "problema." Gad zooks! It wasn't a disorder or a "problema", but it was a lot of excitement!

I'm glad that I only have to explain some of DS4's quirks in English (like when he strips off his clothes in public because he gets drops of water on them). My DS has very strange peculiarites about when he'll get wet - bath/shower OK. Clothes getting wet, even just a drip - NOT OK. Swimming in Aruba, no problems, once we coaxed him in the pool and warm ocean. Swim at the cold northern MN lake - OK if it's 90 degrees out and he can go naked. Swimming at the YMCA - so far, he has refused to go back because they make the beginner swimmers wear float belts, which are itchy. I got a recommendation of one of the teachers who is willing to do private lessons in special circumstances (the person who recommended this instructor had a brother with Down's Syndrome, who got private lessons and this instructor was great and super patient.) The instructor called to tell me of a TLC class she teachers, maximum 4 students, and we're signed up for november. We'll have to see! Lori - maybe you could check at the Y to see if anyone has worked with special needs kids for swimming lessons? It's taken us 2 years to find this person - i have discovered that not all members of our Y have regular access to their emails, so going in and phone calls worked best. Good luck. (I'll keep you posted on how our swimming lessons go.)

ACS, your story made me smile even though I'm sure it was quite a difficulty at the time. I don't know, maybe it was your wording, but I imagined your whole family sitting together over a holiday dinner laughing at the story while you related it too your grandkids some day.....


Yes, I hear the Y is supposed to be really good with these situations........if you can find the right person and the right y.

'Neato,you're right, it was funny, even at the time. There was a moment on the third day or so when he was about to take a bite of rice that had green bits (spices) in it, which would have been very brave of him. He was hesitating, but was really about to do it. Then one of the ladies saw his hesitation and said helpfully, "Puede comer helado." He looked up from his rice and said, "Si, helado, por favor." That was hilarious.

Well, at least he learned some Spanish.

The hard part is that I never learned to be comfortable with the judgment DS and I seem to get from other parents. So when they question me, I take it as criticism. Well, my son eats meat, why doesn't yours? If you just cut it up small enough... Why do you let him get away with .... I am just too thin-skinned.

Wow, MON, it's too bad you aren't available for Lori's son!

If I could find someone like you to teach him, I think he could do it.

Only skimmed a few of these, but had to say that these goggles changed everything for DS when he was learning to swim (they also come in adult sizes and tinted/non-tinted). http://www.aquasphereswim.com/us/products/seal_kid_clr_transblu.html

They fit on the face, not in the eye sockets, so they're more comfortable, and even more importantly, they have quick release tabs for on/off so they don't pull hair, aren't too tight, etc. Once he had these, underwater was no problem. He now will swim without goggles, but this was a big first step in swim lessons.

Cool! thanks, questions. So far my DS4 doesn't mind the other goggles, but he definitely won't swim without goggles. I'll keep these in mind in case we have any troubles.