Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Your friends' reaction about your kids

Thks for all the sharing! I am very sure I am in the right place!

As I was telling Dottie that I am on the other side of the world. So u can imagine my surprise when I logged in this morning and saw 3 pages of sharing! It took me a while to read thro them but I'm happy to be learning!

Come to think of it, the only friend here who is always supportive is this mom whose DD was best friend with DS when they were both in K and G1. In fact, they were inseparable... to the extend that the sch decided that they should be in different classes from G2 onwards. This friend knows DS8's strengths and his quirks. Sometimes when I shared with her abt DS's unsuccessful attempts esp. when it comes to a social setting (in the playground especially), she understands!!! (unlike parents with boys who think that I SHOULD have exposed DS to rougher playing/ sports since boys will be boys).

There is a chinese phrase that says "playing the music instrument to the cow" ... loosely translated to " u would not get the audience if they are not the right crowd". I will learn to keep my mouth shut and to think before I speak.

HOw abt the term "math genius" ? (which I come across quite alot) I don't know to agree / disagree!


GUess that's what I am going thro' now.

That's so terrible. U must have felt awful then.


U have a smart little one there! When we see their cheery smiles at home, u know u must have done something right!


That's a good suggestion... thks! and how true to the last sentence....

I get these internalized thoughts too!

I can imagine the type of response I will get!?

"Poor thing...let the kid have a happy childhood!"

This reminds me of a cute shirt I saw. It was DS's favorite color with "Boy Genius" on the front. I am sure that I would have gotten this before I had DS tested, but now I feel it's off limits.

My sister in-law got a shirt like that for my son...... he only wears it to sleep in

Having somebody IRL really helps a lot. I am lucky enough that I have a few local DYS families and met others through them as well.

Thank you so much for the Hoagie's link. I really needed it. Lately I have got lots of unsolicited advice regarding DS6 and I am getting fed up with it. People assume that hs is the last option for us and that they need to help us find other solution.

This one is from yesterday, "Last year we had little Johny in our PreK class and he came knowing everything we did during the year. He knew his letters and such. His Mom is really happy with the ... school district. You can go as far as you can in their high school. Have you consider this for DS6?"

First of all my child is 6 and I couldn't care less what they do in high school. Second of all I am happy that little Johny is fine in K, but unless Johny read chapter books to the class at the age of 3 or knew binary numbers at 4 chances are we are talking about very different kids. Of course, I cannot say none of these things. I tried the "You know we have a family consultant (thank to Davidson) with whom we talk about all such issues ...." I got "Oh yeah, my friend had such a consultant for her 2 kids." Yeah, right. We are so not talking the same language.

I get this from people who really care, but they just don't get it. I shouldn't be surprised though. Let's face it a year ago I had no clue how far away from his peers he was. If it wasn't for the tests I may still doubt even his HG status.

I really need to start using something like "We are homeschooling this year. It's amazing how much flexibility it gives us both curriculum and time wise. You know DS6 can do his academics in the morning and then go to ... school to socialize with other kids. He can take gt classes on Sundays and take a day off during the regular week. We really like this option." followed by "How is your child doing?" That could take care of it, what do you think?

That's happened to me a time or two: someone thinks I just haven't explored all the options. When it happens, I'm polite and I listen. I figure you never know where a great tip will come from. (Case in point: I just heard about a local GT school that I'd never heard of before. Granted it's for 7-12th graders, but still...it was new to me.) But I do not EVER feel the need to defend my choice to homeschool.

I usually just say, "Thanks, but we looked at other options. Given where he's at, we're pretty happy with homeschooling." Then I throw out my patented <shrug> to show that I'm not offended, but I'm not talking about it any more. Keep it short, you know?

I don't entertain the notion that some casual stranger knows better than I do--not even for a second. Nor do I feel any need to defend our choices. I listen because I might learn something that could help someone I know if not our family (probably not our family! I've done my research...). But I don't get into it with them. A polite head nod and thanks, a shrug, and then we move on.

Don't let 'em get you down, LMom!

That's probably a big part of my problem. In most case I do feel the need to explain. I will get over it like I got over explaining while I was still bf or doing this or that. Then I will just listen and politely smile while laughing at the crazy comments inside