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    Joined: Jul 2012
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    Originally Posted by nicoledad
    Because,and this story isn't a good example, in life you don't always get what you want.

    This sounds so much like what schools are trying to tell us about our kids who understand more and want more and they get to hear "tough life, you don't always get what you want, so get used to it, learn to sit, wait and listen". Isn't that what most of us fight against on a daily basis on behalf of our children?

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    I agree. People tend to like to bash schools on here. I think someone said earlier but my guess is they didn't want to leave a teacher behind just for one kid but they didn't want to give that as their reason.

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    I never heard that sit wait and listen before but maybe that's me. I guess I must be the only one that lives in an area where schools are good. My comment really had nothing to do with schools.

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    I also don't see it as a red flag at all. It could be any of the reasons mentioned above. I'd also consider that they might want him to attend because the field trip is directly related to seething that is currently being studied in class. Maybe our schools are different than elsewhere, but the vast majority of my kids' field trips are either related to current classroom studies (most field trips), classroom community building (typically only at beginning or end of the school year), or arts appreciation or traveling special exhibit in town. The third things on my list are the only trips is really consider optional - and I would still send my kids because I think they are worthwhile and they (here) are usually free or much lower cost than to the general public.

    Have you asked the school yet why it's mandatory?

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    Originally Posted by nicoledad
    Cost was never involved in your original statement. I just never heard of 7 year olds making parental decisions. I certainly never would of asked my 7 year old for any input.

    The OP said, DS7 has already been to this place enough, so doesn't feel like going again just now, and besides they were planning to homschool all day that day, so going on a redundant field trip would just be a disruption.

    In other words it's just a common sense decision.

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    Originally Posted by HowlerKarma
    I think it's a wise parent that rewards logical and rational argumentation in such children at seven. That was always our condition for having one's voice heard-- provide me with REASONS, not whining, and be prepared to back your opinion just as I'd ask another adult to. Do that, and your opinion counts for a lot more.


    I agree with this, and I'll post an article that I think I've posted here before, but is relevant to this discussion: How to Teach a Child to Argue

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    My ds 11 has always liked to go on field trips.
    If he said he didn't want to go I would wonder why and hear him out.
    I can't imagine never asking him for input, even at 7 I wanted him to be part of the conversation.

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    It is the parent's decision, and they can decide after hearing the reasons to go or not. OP's DS7 has already given reasons he needn't go (already been there, wants to school all day at home that day). Nobody else has given any reasons why he should go, so ...

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    Originally Posted by blackcat
    If a student here has a certain number of unexcused absences, like 10 or 14, or tardies (if a child is even one minute late they mark it as a tardy) the school calls CPS and there is a truancy case. I think once a kid hits 14 absences, they have to bring in doctor's notes. Parents have access to an online acct. and I was looking at DS's page yesterday, and they have documented every absence and the reason for it (sick, medical appt., unexcused, etc). There is even a graph showing the percentage of sick days vs. unexcused, etc.

    I wonder if this could have to do with that....they are trying to make a case that there are too many unexcused absences? I don't know, just thought I'd throw that out there


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    Are you serious? That is crazy. Here it would take a lot more than that (like 6 months non attendance) to get a truancy case taken though if my child were late to school every day the school social worker might get involved.

    The only other thing I can think of is that they think you are deliberately preventing your child from attending when he wants to go because you don't want him exposed to things without you being there to control what he sees/does.

    I wouldn't ask ds7's opinion on a field trip but I would listen if he expressed an opinion.

    You don't always get what you want in life but I'm not sure you need to spend your childhood preparing for this. I'm assuming he gets a little practice anyway as most people insist of some diet and sleep limitations. Besides if life isn't fair you should work to make it fair not shrug your shoulders and hope you are always on the right side of the unfairness.

    Last edited by puffin; 06/11/14 02:04 PM.
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    Originally Posted by puffin
    Originally Posted by blackcat
    If a student here has a certain number of unexcused absences, like 10 or 14, or tardies (if a child is even one minute late they mark it as a tardy) the school calls CPS and there is a truancy case. I think once a kid hits 14 absences, they have to bring in doctor's notes. Parents have access to an online acct. and I was looking at DS's page yesterday, and they have documented every absence and the reason for it (sick, medical appt., unexcused, etc). There is even a graph showing the percentage of sick days vs. unexcused, etc.

    I wonder if this could have to do with that....they are trying to make a case that there are too many unexcused absences? I don't know, just thought I'd throw that out there


    .
    Are you serious? That is crazy. Here it would take a lot more than that (like 6 months non attendance) to get a truancy case taken though if my child were late to school every day the school social worker might get involved.

    I know kids who habitually missed 30+ days of school each year, and no truancy case was generated, despite this wording in the law:

    "A student shall be considered habitually absent or habitually tardy when either condition continues to exist after all reasonable efforts by any school personnel, truancy officer, or other law enforcement personnel have failed to correct the condition after the fifth unexcused absence or fifth unexcused occurrence of being tardy within any school semester."

    Policy and practice don't often match.

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